bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145864
 25.10.2017
The church says that man is sinful and God is sinless.

What is sin? For example, murder of another person. Anger at another person.

The World Flood is the deliberate conscious destruction of virtually all mankind by drowning, after God was angry with that mankind.

That is to say, God essentially teaches only one thing – if you are God, then you can do anything.

And the church teaches to accept this sadomaso as a normal relationship.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145863
 25.10.2017
They wanted to take me to the army while I was studying at university. There was no desire to pay debts to the homeland, but you cannot not go to the medical examination. I went through it. The speed of its passage is faster than in paid clinics. And here I go to the surgeon. Then I just had an exacerbation of valgus deformation (growing bone on the leg) and when asked about the complaints I asked the surgeon the question: "I have valgus deformation, what to do?" One million people answered, “I don’t know, I’m not a doctor.”

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №145862
 25.10.2017
So very natural!
-"xxx: This is a classic of robotics - it is easy to make a robot that flies to Mars and it is difficult to make a robot that runs into a neighboring bar for beer :)"

To Mars - it is in one direction, and "for beer" - it is to go back!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №145861
 25.10.2017
The most difficult thing in an antivirus developer’s work is to teach him how to distinguish viral programs from official applications. They are equally masked, protected from detection, deletion by the user. They do the same thing - collect data, monitor which programs are running. The only difference is that they send information to different addresses.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №145860
 25.10.2017
In Blessed Europe no excise duties and compulsory insurance etc.

WOW, WOW, and why do I get tax freed if I don’t? O_O

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145859
 25.10.2017
Alcohol only makes a woman more attractive when a man drinks alcohol.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145858
 25.10.2017
Near the land plot on which my house stands, there is a LEP. A couple of weeks ago, from the window, I noticed that in the most remote corner of the site, a bird is hanging, crawling with its wings, trying to fly through the fence of the rabbit grid, but it is not possible. At first, it seemed to me from a distance that it was some neighbor's chicken lost, but when I came closer, I didn't believe my eyes: in front of me ran on the grass and waved the wings of a real, and seemingly quite an adult, beautiful gray-and-white frog (then I was told that it was a gray-and-white frog). And it is almost in the center of a large regional city! Most likely, I thought, it hit the wire, damaged the wing, and now can’t take off. Of course, he could not be left so, he would definitely either die of hunger or become a victim of wandering cats. Since I can’t deal with predatory birds, I started calling friends and acquaintances. The Soviets, of course, tried to give everything, but mostly the type of such that to teach him to sit on his shoulder instead of a poppy and shout "piastri, piastri!". We were lucky with the bird. One of my classmates found a friend, who once lived in the courtyard in a volley, of course, he knows what to feed, what to show to the veterinarian, and even from his former pet left a volley. I caught the bird carefully, which was not a lot of trouble, because it was tired of its fruitless attempts to take off and silenced, only looked closely at me with smart eyes, put it in a box under the microwave and waited for his arrival. We greeted, met, he looked at the barley and said that he would take it and show it to a familiar ornithologist, and at the same time told me the story of his barley. The story seems interesting to me, so I decided to write my own.
To this guy, his name is Sergey, once a familiar hunter gave a puppy of a frog, apparently falling out of the nest. Sergey built a volley for him and fed him. It turned out that it was a female who lived with him, grew up and became so accustomed to the man that she took a piece of meat from the owner's hand and swiftly sat on her hand. Yastrebiha lived with him in the volleyball for more than five years and did not show any desire to leave, although such an opportunity was granted to her, a couple of times Sergey forgot to close the volleyball. And suddenly one day in his courtyard began to fly every day of the eagle-samean, who sat on a tree near the volley for days and for nothing wanted to fly away. So the birds looked at each other all day, in the evening the male flew, but in the morning always returned. Sergey became clear that his fiancé flew to his bird, who fell in love with her by ears and now will not fall behind until the owner leaves his beloved. It was a pity to let the bird go, he was accustomed to it, and if it could survive in the wild. But at the same time, Sergey understood that you will not argue with nature, the bridegroom will not lag behind, so he decided, opened the door and left. The bride, not thinking for a long time, came out of the volley, spread the wings, flew, and the couple, having made a bit of a circle in the air, flew away. After a few days, the strawberry flew alone, sat on a tree near her wheelchair for a long time, let the owner come to her, but she did not take a piece of beef from his hands and did not sit on her hand either. So I sat on a tree for a few hours and flew away, forever. This is such a story.
And my deer Sergey showed the ornithologist, there was a stretching of the wing, so my assumption about the impact on the LED wire was most likely true. Now he lives in the "inherited" volley, recovers, feeds on mice, which Sergey catches for him alive with the help of a mouse. Those living on the site of the Caucasian and Alabayan this predator intimidated so that they were afraid even to get close to his voller. As soon as the wing is restored and he can fly, Sergey will release him.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №145857
 25.10.2017
There was a doctor in the trauma. All motorcycles were there, and even in the winter. Motorcyclists acted in the form of a puzzle. His favorite words were, “Tejek-s, this one will pull a thousand details.”
One day I brought a girl-biker. Beautiful and beautiful. When he began to shout over her, he said:
Don’t worry, I’ll get married.
I did not pick. was married.
Now when he is told that his wife is beautiful, he answers:
Do you like? I collected myself.

[ + 25 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145856
 25.10.2017
#gay_gay_round_be empty

“The healthy attitude of a healthy society is manifested in the spirit: ‘Son, you like girls – that’s normal, but the conditional Vase likes boys and he meets a boy – and that’s also normal and has a place to be.”

Here is the error. There is a place to be – yes. You do not need to jump on them with forks and burn on the fires - again yes. But this is not the norm. For example, disabled people and mentally retarded people are not the norm, but in a healthy society they are treated as people. In good health, yes.
Still, there is something unhealthy in the craving of people to the details of the personal life of completely unfamiliar people.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №145855
 25.10.2017
Mom hugged me and said:
- Fu, he is already an adult, big, smells of cigarettes from him. And the little one was so nice, curly and didn’t crawl.
I was very surprised. It was about a beard.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145854
 25.10.2017
LGBT will not become the norm, even if you shake. And the healthy attitude of society is not to plant and not to execute, but to recognize as sick, to try to treat, failed - to isolate in order to avoid.
and gt;
To avoid what? Are you afraid to admit that your fear of gays is based on the fear that you will be raped by gays? Or are you afraid to be seduced by homosexuals because you dream of male pops?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145853
 25.10.2017
XXX: Remove a picture from the soul
YYY: No, I am so ZBS
XXX: I haven’t seen it.
yyy: in connection with the flow of naked photos on the network I linked
I’m not a puppy, don’t you trust me?
YYY : Okay On the wave of unrestrained trust, give me my credit number and key, or do you not trust me?
You only need money and the same grandmother.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145852
 25.10.2017
Levskvik is short. I am standing in the ashan, picking wipes, the grandmother runs, sweats me a package, says, say, read, what is in the composition, I don't see. I say - cellulose, it throws the wipes back and so "tfu, chemistry consistent"

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145851
 24.10.2017
Wuzaza 21.10.17 at 17:37
The danger of domestic medicine is leveled by its difficulty of access :D

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №145850
 24.10.2017
Xenos WIGHT: Gathered in search "quality response to copper" - one of the found options "first response - steal and give"

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145849
 24.10.2017
From the news:
In Nizhny Novgorod, a student of the Academy of the Ministry of Internal Affairs had sex in a nightclub. He was removed

The first stone: "Nibaca!!and "

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №145848
 24.10.2017
As an example, I, receiving a good white salary, calculated the deductions to the state funds in recent years and found that with that money I could: pay both grandmothers their current pension, watch the whole family regularly in a private clinic and still postpone for old age. I am one. With one salary.
And in fact - for the treatment of the whole family I pay extra (free of our all familiar) and PFR on the verge of bankruptcy, so the pension is far from guaranteed to me.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145847
 24.10.2017
From talks of acquaintances:
We have a strange relationship with light. There is no sex, we live in the same apartment. But you know, I am satisfied.
This is called "marry at first sight".
Could we really get married?

[ + 25 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145846
 24.10.2017
>>>>>
Moreover, attempts to make the presence of same-sex marriages, gay, lesbian, transgender people in Russia usual do not bring the desired results. At least until they bring. Therefore, the news that transgender and gay people in Europe are driving and provoking such interest.>>>>
Here is Nippon, guys. The healthy attitude of a healthy society is manifested in the spirit: "Son, you like girls - this is normal, but the conditional Vase likes boys and he meets a boy - and this is also normal and has a place to be. They are the same people as you and I with the same rights." The actual acceptance of the variants of the norm and the absence of a clutter on the subject. We also have pgm-nute obscurity and total uneducation on the topic of sex in general. Therefore, every bitch to faint is afraid of a terrible beast called Gay (transgender, transvestite, etc.) And he thinks he is better simply because he’s ‘staying up’ and ‘this’ doesn’t look like people. The fact that "scraps", the foundations of Orthodoxy, the prohibition of any sex education up to 18 in our legislative level, it is actually scary. Hence the thousands of pregnant schoolgirls 11-16, who seemed not to know that children are not brought after marriage, hence the percentage of HIV-infected almost like in Africa... sadly it is all.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №145845
 24.10.2017
I had to use the subway today. A few minutes after I got into the car, someone put my hand under my shirt. When I turned around, the one who did it said “Oh, I thought you were more beautiful” and dropped it.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna