bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №20188
 10.09.2009
In our organization, the dress code is not introduced, but it is necessary:( once every six months came in a cushion, swallowing your back when you sit. So I got our Nikolaich on my back while I was sitting behind the computer - the organization’s stamp was squeezed!! and then still pursued me for half an hour with a pen and screams "I have not had time to get the inventory number!"
70 years old, God give him health.

[ + 67 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20187
 10.09.2009
I work with a loved one in the same company. He often helps me with work issues, adding "you will work out in the evening". Sanna in the morning, going to work, carelessly walked around the house in a puddle. There was a spontaneous sex. now has a status in the ass "for the first time received a prepayment"

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №20186
 10.09.2009
My son almost two years. He does something on his own, including Going to the pot.
We go for a walk. I am small: "I need to write on the road".
The son is good. Son of Executive. I wrote on the carpet in the corridor.

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №20185
 10.09.2009
From the news:
American villages were visited by a gynecologist
In the U.S. state of Florida, a 76-year-old retired man was driving around the area and, pretending to be a doctor, offered women to undergo a free gynecological examination, as well as to examine his breasts.

No comments ) )

[ + 72 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20184
 10.09.2009
Answer to:
If after a long trip your husband swears that he has nothing with women, then he is either an onanist, or impotent, or blue, or a liar! Is the fourth option preferred?

------------

Does the fifth option please you? He loves you. You are very spoiled girls.

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №20183
 10.09.2009
Numbe®One (09:28:15 10/09/2009)
Did you know that your father killed two rabbits with one mouth?

Numbe®One (09:28:25 10/09/2009)
He also raised a tree.

The Tree (09:28:31 10/09/2009)
and ROFL

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №20182
 10.09.2009
I organized myself in the car park to work as a driver.I fix a car for a week....I didn't get acquainted completely boring.I think to go and call the bat to work.And there the phone is common and through the glass the controller sits... I get a notebook and I call him( and my working phone was recorded next to it, i.e., the controller) now I call the number takes the tube woman...please call Musychenko...and I wait.... here through a loud communication I hear-Musychenko to the phone 2 times))) I knock on the glass and I say that it is I))))she gives me the phone and says- boring Slavochka yes?))))) I was red.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №20181
 10.09.2009
You can imagine, because of my illness, I can’t taste or smell! and :(
xxxh: my younger sister declares to me... "Sad that you are not blind, so you would fuck dinner. :D good...))))

[ + 69 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20180
 10.09.2009
Optimus Prime and Dumbledore are the heaviest losses this year

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №20179
 10.09.2009
I recently understood that loneliness is when you feed a fly in the post, in the hope that it will not go anywhere for winter.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №20178
 10.09.2009
From the Forum:
According to today's system requirements, 128 MB of operating memory is sclerosis

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №20177
 10.09.2009
Prep at the lecture:
"The third half of the table will be the largest..."

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №20176
 10.09.2009
xxx: sweet, I sometimes get bored of you, and I think you'll call now, and you'll call. Do you have this?
YYY: Of course it happens! Here, for instance, we go to the roof, dragging with a partner LVS shelf 33U to the 3rd floor, which weighs 100 kilograms. You are calling! )
XXX: Sculpture

[ + 132 - ] Comment quote №20175
 10.09.2009
I apologize in advance for not having any sense of humor. I hope the community will support.

05.09.09 in the area of 23:00-00:00 at the crossing of street. Plekhanovskaya and Ul. Pushkinskaya had a serious accident:
"Infinity" at a speed of 140-150 km / h, driving on the red light, crashed into the 9th, both cars turned, and "Infinity" eventually crashed into the next 10th. At this point, people approached her: the owner and the girl (21 years old).
The man with a stroke of the brain and cuts is now in hospital.
The girl died.

From Infinity, a guy and a girl came out, looked like, then he said he was sick, and he goes to the hospital. No longer saw him.

The case needs to be made public, because the guilty party does EVERYTHING so that there is no information about the accident and the accident itself.

Inhabitants of Voronezh help the mother of the girl who died in the car accident. Do not pass by, please. Please help us. Place this post in your home, and help to draw attention to it Russian media!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №20174
 10.09.2009
Money is rubbish and women are a vacuum cleaner.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №20173
 10.09.2009
Speeches of German School Students

In German schools, as in Russia, children write works and referrals. In some places, these breeds of unstable minds make them slip from the chair in the rocks of laughter.
Having recovered from another attack of fun, after reading one of these opus, I found the strength to translate some of the German school folklore into Russian.

So, what is the world of second-class students in Germany:

1st The Muslim Bible is called Kodak.

Fuji in Japanese is when you die.

2nd The Pope lives in the vacuum.

No bad idea!

Three In France, criminals were previously executed with gelatin.

4 is You can only marry one woman. This is called monotony.

Unfortunately, even secondary school students already understand this.

5 is We all have our own room. He doesn’t have a dad, so he has to sleep with his mom.

You are not lucky, Dad.

6 is Garden dwarves wear red caps so that they are not moved by a grass-cutting machine.

is logical.

7 is Men cannot marry men because then none of them will be able to wear the wedding dress.

What a pity.

8 is Life insurance is the money that the person who survived a fatal accident receives.

Absolutely exactly! And then he lives somewhere in Brazil under a fictional name.

9 is On the weekend, my dad took the first place at the rabbit exhibition.
What a wonderful dad.

10 is It is better to adopt. Parents can choose the child for themselves, not have to take what they will get.

This also works for domestic animals.

11 is During the day, God lives in heaven. Only on Sundays he appears in the church.

And constantly these pain of choice, about such a number of churches.

12 is My brother fell from a tree, and now he has a brain shock.

Thirteen The northern hemisphere rotates on the opposite side of the south.

Ecuadorians are happy to have breakfast in Africa and dinner in South Africa.
of America.

14 is Cows walk slowly to avoid spilling milk.
The smart ones.

15 is Rainworms bite after they only have a tail in front and back.

This is also completely logical!

16 is Peach is an apple covered with a carpet.

And “skinned” peaches shave before selling!

17th I am not baptized, but I am vaccinated.

You can be sure that it is much more useful.

18 is After humans ceased to be monkeys, they became Egyptians.

I did not know that! But I bitterly suspected.

19 is Spring is the first of four seasons of the year. In the spring, the chickens lay eggs, and the peasants the potatoes.

Here is the seat!

20 is The uncle took the pig into a barrel and quickly slaughtered it along with his grandfather.
My grandmother was left “for later.”

21 is My aunt had so much pain in the joints that she could barely raise her arms above her head. The feet were the same.

22nd The Earth rotates 365 days each year. But once every four years she needs one more day. This day always happens in February. Why so I do not know. Probably because in February it is always cold, and turning a little harder.

23nd My sister is seriously ill. She takes one pill every day.
But so that if parents do not see, or they will be worried.

What a caring daughter!

24 is The most useful animal is the pig. From it you can use anything - meat from hand to hand, skin on skin, brush on brushes, and the name for insults.

Translated by c German Gerzen ( www.pentagra.de ).

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №20172
 10.09.2009
Where did you get your tail?
The Queen of the Elves gave me.
Where did the tail come from?

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №20171
 10.09.2009
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
YYY: Well Titan is not bad such, Nickel so no
Wolfram, take care of it.
XXX in English?

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №20170
 10.09.2009
XXX: International Day of Literacy
Theme: Sponsored

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №20169
 10.09.2009
I have a new nick, please change my name. and :-)

f.0.x: what did you have?

Chapter 22: The Princess

f.0.x is very nice. No difference to me.

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