Son to the cat: - Fu, Masya, as opposed, the ass is licking.
I: – That’s how educated people don’t talk. Say it decently.
The son thought for a moment: - the cat is licking his rear!

Casting for a Beauty Contest
The cast member: My town is called Barsuki. Once there were many lakes. There lived a lot of barracks. They built dams.

Comment 1: It looks like it is not built. So everything is okay with me.

Commentary 2: If you need OkeyGoogles for this, then you are not okay with it.

UUU: Delivered a description of the cleaning agent for something there: "XXXX" kills all the microbes. Even a cosmic vacuum combined with a temperature of -273 degrees does not kill all microbes. A "XXXX" means all, no-no

The revelation of Kim Jong-un's brother did not establish the cause of his death.

According to the ancient Baha'an, he died of openings.

> Suppose you are even beautiful.
1st I will treat you as an equal as a colleague. And I don’t give flowers to my men at work, I don’t serve champagne, I don’t bowl with tenderness – hold, beer, brother. Agree
They don’t need such women. Freedom of choice, market, all business – if you want to be strong, be strong. And those who are willing to change the borst and beauty for attention, do not bother. No, you are a man!

A guy, equality is not "like a man". If you say that a woman must be a man to be considered equal, then you do not recognize women as equal, you believe that there are only men and as men.

>> To speak does not mean to roast or to roast
>> True literary speech

> I, of course, understand everything, but how long has it been "roasting" in the meaning of "laughing loudly and unstoppably" - a truly literary speech? O_O

Since then, it has been a “literary speech” ≠ a “sharp high style.” That is, from about the time when the old Державин moved the horses, and descending into the tomb, he allowed everything; more precisely, I would love to ban, but I could not spy on everyone. Buffos, a parody, a game of contrasts, grotesque, the opposition of styles, deliberate spaciousness - all this is quite self-sufficient, for example. And "soundlessly roasting, suffocating and glowing with two tears in the corners of the eyes" is quite a literary description. It does not necessarily have to be about the salon "elite", the character and rust has the right.

I work in a publishing house, among other things, I am engaged in the selection of paintings for scanwords. I spend a lot of time in Google and Yandex pictures. There are no restrictions on the subject. An important point: since there are certain requirements for the images, you have to replicate a lot of images, for example, a bus, until you find a more or less suitable one.
The funniest comes closer to the end of the working day, when confident contextual advertising begins to servicefully put in a row of offers to buy burning trips to the tropics, pneumatic tools and elite puppies. Or offer to join a group of cookers, get a fluier and order a parody artist for the holiday. How diverse and bright I am, it turns out, live...

Alex and I agreed to meet for nothing to do. However, the date and time were not immediately agreed. “I need to talk to my mom,” the boy explained. I didn’t mind being the most important person in my life.



Here we finally walk through the park, Alexey is tense and concentrated.

Do I study? here there. My mother advised. I work out there. In the neighboring department with my mother.



There was a phone call, the guy knocked on the phone: "Mom, I can't talk now, I'll call again a little later. Yes is normal. Yes we met. Nicole is like that. Shirt was worn.”



Finally, I come to the question of dreams.

Well, I would like to travel.

Where would you like to go?

Alexis turned up:

I don’t know, I have to ask my mom.

XX: Do you remember you turned on the music, and I spoke that it was a wild shit?

YYYY: Yes

XXX: The Name of the Pillow

I took a taxi tonight. The driver on the phone has a type of alarm, there is also a function of an alarm button, in case the driver is in danger or someone does not want to pay. In general, this time, I witnessed a conversation on the ‘racy’ of the following content: an alarm button worked in the private sector of the city. Free taxi drivers broke there. The reason - the woman came out of the taxi and said that her husband is now calculated. The man was drunk, meeting the lady with a three-storey mat, force pushed her home. The taxi driver knocked on the door, opened the man and said he would not pay for his wife’s trip. After which an alarm button worked, taxi drivers pressed, began to insist that a man or woman still paid for the trip. The man promised to pay now, but only to find the wallet. He went into the house, returned with a gun and shrugged, as if he did not hit anyone. Called the police. Then I got out of the taxi and I didn’t know what happened.

I got out of the car and I think - it's how much you need to be a bullshit to risk getting a term or a bullet from the police for 150 rubles. 150 rubles for you!! to

I was 5 years old. We lived in the village at the time. My mom and dad taught me to read from the age of four, and reading became my favorite activity. There were no bookstores, and the children’s books that were in the house were quickly running out. I kept telling my mother’s stories. My mom decided to write a story for me.

For several evenings she diligently carried out the printed letters on the spreaded leaflets, painted drawings, and a couple of days later gave me a book of her own manufacture. This book was about the rabbit (I remember the drawings).

I did not like this book. I said I’t read such a story that it wasn’t true.

My mother asked me to read and assured me that this was the true fairy tale, but after useless admonitions, she threw it into the oven.

18 years have passed.

I only now realize how valuable this book was.

It’s been almost 15 years since I quit this job. I recently had a dream: I fell into slavery, and I and other slaves were taken there by bus. So I want to go out...

I have a cat. He does not allow himself to glow. Because when you touch it, it immediately hits the current. At first he just ran away, but now he begins to attack in response. If there are electrics, please tell me how to ground a cat?

We decided to go on a shale with a company from the city to the village. I have already arrived there, I went to refuel and at the same time to buy on the gasoline barrel for the fire. And here is my friend from the village, Nestor. (I saw him only as a child, so there were no common themes) I smiled, said that I was very happy to see him and, say, we went to the shelves, went with us. Christmas holidays, why not? He was a little upset, but agreed. He was driving behind our car. They sat well, cooked a shale, laughed from the heart, everything was like a picnic. And only at the end there was a strange dialogue - And why did you call me with you, we don't even know... And so I learned that it wasn't Nestor at all.

I read the post about the police in Kazakhstan and remembered the case. Two years ago I worked with my mother in the apartment. At 8 p.m. the doorkeeper came to us. Here it began. A neighbor's grandmother came and arranged a scandal that we don't let her sleep and in general, she will call the police now. No explanations worked, and when the grandmother began to shake openly, the doors were closed before her.

About an hour and a half later, a lieutenant called us. Of course, nobody was no longer noisy. Everyone quietly discussed, wrote all the necessary papers and sent him with God. In 20 minutes I come to the kitchen and see the machine. I call my mother. First the stupor. Then we start roasting.

Here the question arises. What to do that? If you call the department, the lieutenant will be fired in the best case. He left no data. Where to look for is unknown. He does not return to the machine.

In short, we called the department and said we liked the lieutenant very much and we’t see him again.) I was grateful, almost crying. I asked what we said on the phone when we called the department. In exchange of kindness, we accompanied him and the machine. A week later he came and handed me a bottle of champagne and candy.

The morality? There is no morality. My grandmother could have been shot.

It was in his youth, in the late 1990s. We fought often, for and without. Those who lived in the sleeping areas of small towns know.

We go at four o’clock in the morning after some hustle. On the opposite side of the road, along a parallel course, there are four other drunk people. Maybe the guys got bored, and they started harassing us. We guys are calm, so we try not to pay attention to them. For a long time they endured their provocations, but at some point the patience came to an end. Revenge is inevitable. Silently we cross the road, automatically we understand the opponent, and, in the best traditions of the militants of the time, we punish the villains. When the passions vanish, we see one of our guys (Timotheus) standing next to the alleged sparring partner, both smoking, discussing something enthusiastically.

As a result, the hooligans, realizing their mistake, quickly withdrew, and we rushed to find out from the comrade what it was, and why he did not support the attack on his front.

Following the words of Timothy

(T): I run to the man (C), I stumble...

Q: Will you fight?! to

T: Well, in principle, I can’t fight.

Q: Will you smoke?

T: Let it go.



Since then, Timothy has been called a diplomat.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Yyy: Yes, nothing good... The valve is knocking, the oil filter is clogged, the catalyst performs its functions a little more than half...
xxx: From your metaphors I only understood that valves have to do with the heart. What do you mean by the rest?
The oil filter is the liver.
Is the catalyst a lungs?
No, but the kidneys.
XXX: Okay... And the dude hasn’t done it yet?))

Seafarers are angry? I once bought a M&M box, 1.5 kg... And there was a storm, I collected these candy, then, about a week, gathered around the corners. It seems like you collect everything, and the night comes and the unfound candy rolls out and begins to fly in the cabin!!! to

News website headline: "New Zealand police caught a suspicious hunter with a bank of yogurt on his head".

xxx: Well, fucking, for the genius of creativity there they have headlines? They met a hunter whose head was stuck in the bank. He caught a suspicious man. If the police were not New Zealand, but, for example, Dutch, the title would not have caused the slightest rejection.)

If you have achieved complete independence, look closely around: maybe you just didn’t need anyone.