If you do not stop the rise in the price of carrots - Vladimir Vladimirovich can go into history as the Wolf of the Carrot.

Xxx: Once I was sitting on a wheelchair, on a seed stack. Grandfather started sharply with a turn, and I was driven off the stake with a centrifugal force. A drop of meters from 3 and 20 centimeters from the head fell a healthy drin, which this stang had to be pressed.

And one day, my grandfather and I were sitting on a chariot right behind the horse, my grandfather decided to catch up with the red horse and ticked him in the ass with forks. The Redhead was frightened and struck us from foot to head.

My grandfather was still smoking, and when we were riding a cart, he was riding on a seed stack and smoking fireworks. Fireworks were thrown aside after smoking. How many times we burned, I can’t count.

Once I wore cows, sitting on the Rice, and my brother decided to joke, and gently knelt the Rice with a chestnut. The red rose broke straight, and right was the forest. I fell off the tree almost immediately.

One day in the spring, my brother and I went for a walk, early in the morning we crossed the stream and bowed the whole day, and when at three o’clock the day decided to go home, it turned out that the stream turned into an unshakable river, as the sun burned and the snow melted friendly. I had to swim. That was the first time I was rubbed with vodka and pissed at the same time.



You can continue very long... really interesting life in the village )

Xxx: There was a moment, I raised one mountain eagle "brotherly" so it coincided with 300r he lacked for the necessary business (made him a discount, I got 0 earnings). Well, with everyone happens...

He: Brother, thank you very much, I really did not expect, if you ask me, at any time, as I can help.

Recently called

He said: “Hello brother, you remember you gave me a gift then...

I: I remember, do you want to give me money?

He: Yes, no problem at all, but later, who am I calling, can you borrow a couple of rubles? Very needed!

Advertising of Russian banks: “Let’s go around the world for your money!”

It was told by a man who spent 17 years in Stalin camps on a political article.
When he was released in 1953, he was given a goodbye gift by the sludge. He says to them:
“Thank you guys, but why do I need a knife? You know, I don’t go with a knife.
They are him:
Everything is right. You live on the Column now, why do you have a knife? And tomorrow you go to Moscow, there can not walk without a knife.

What is this Russian French Soviet champagne so expensive? You are a carrot, what do you do?

U: A modest question, how long have you been married?

Z is 8 years.

U: Repair survived at least one?

Z: Three moves, two repairs, the construction of the house is now maturating.

A very strong marriage :)

People stick to their stories until they become horror films.

It was told by the writer Andrei Rubanov, who sat in the second half of the 90s.

“I remember a case.
We are sitting somehow in the investigative prison “Matrossia Silence”. Summer is very hot. There are about 150 people in 32 places. 15 degrees, that is, if on the street +30, then in the chamber +45, and absolute humidity, from body vapors and breathing. And in addition, everyone smokes, although from the moisture cigarettes hardly burn. They are all cowards. The elderly, who had a weak heart, fainted, their hands and legs were carried out to the corridor, with the permission of the guards, and they were placed there on the cool coffee floor to shake. The ventilation did not work, but it was allowed to accept fans from relatives. We turned down, who had money in the families, pulled four large office floor fans into the chamber. It turned on and it got worse. But there were engineers among the arrested, and even one aircraft manufacturer with a MAI diploma, they said, and you are doing the wrong thing. Do not direct the flow of air into your mouth. On the contrary, all the equipment must be raised on the windows, and installed strictly on the outlet, so that bad air can be driven out, and good, fresh - will flood itself. Because it kills not heat, but moisture and lack of oxygen. So we did. That summer, the body guards, when they came to us, respectfully said that we had the coolest camera on our floor.
Since then, I have taken more attention to engineers.
Don’t get sick, take care of yourself.”

If you have smoked, and the food in the bowl has never appeared, then you are probably not a cat. I have to go and work.

“The Boy in the Striped Pyjama.” A heavy film.



YYY: 7 GB

A man from the former...

(February 24 in Ukraine)

She: -Slu, I want a set of rolls on the 8th of March (oil, 2 loaves, oak and tuna)

I: Taxi, where is my gift for 23?

She says, “Now 23 is not recorded.

I: So on the day of the Ukrainian Army or Cossacks, I don’t remember any gifts too!? to

He said, “We have never recorded them.

I: So I’ll buy it.

* ordered her a set of rolls and something else, took a set of seafood

The evening of March 8

**I come in the evening from work, in anticipation of a meal of a variety of seafood**

She said, “Mommy came in and we ate all the rolls with her.

I: No, I took you. I open the refrigerator, where is my seafood?

She: - And my mom and I made pizza from them, but it didn't taste good, don't take them anymore!

I: Where is my share?

She: -Well, we picked up the moricas, and the pizza was thrown out, I say it didn't taste good!

Oh my God, how fucking I was.

xxx: also sneeze, I can sleep in front of the monitor, jumping somewhere on the Plotva. With the phone in hand, it was easy.



YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY



Zzzz, don’t wake up

Money ruins a man as much as it can buy impunity.

My grandfather in Civic fought against Kolchak and had a fighting horse named Boy. Usually, in a horse attack, when the squadron of lava went on the enemy, the boy fell into a rage, and, overtaking everyone, he strongly broke forward.
Once again, when the boy left everyone far behind, two white-cossacks jumped on the grandfather. Then he barely escaped from them. After the clash of silence, it turned out that someone cut off one ear of the boy. The loss of the ear added the horse of the mind and he no longer broke forward, trying to hold in the middle of the cavalry lava.

On August 1, the Russian Federation introduced the obligation to wear coloured pants.
Green is untouched.
Sirenes put the first component.
Yellow two components.
Raspberry vaccine developer and healthcare worker.

Usually the most willing to express their opinions are those whose opinions do not interest anyone.

She grew up in a house next to a trolleybus depot. They make a lot of noise, annoying everyone. But I was born when they were already there and I didn’t know how it would be without them. By them I checked the time and the weather, if the first time they went, then the hour of the night, to roll, and sleep for a long time. If the second time, then four, it is on the route and sleeping nothing left. When it was raining, the horns were shrinking in a special way, and when it was frosty, it was cracking and sparkling. Now I live where there are no trolley buses, around the woods. But sometimes I dream where I hear their noise. I wake up, and it’s about an hour... or four.

The Lebanese-Israeli border Israeli patrols are circling the area. Suddenly a bullet whisper is heard.
Nemo is a Lebanese sniper.
So why don’t you remove it? The newcomer asks.
He’s been there for two months and hasn’t found anyone yet. And if you remove him, go and know who will be put in his place.

Xxx: My husband is quite impeccable. To scratch with me, to scratch, to scratch eggs - for him in order of things. To my complaints, he answers that this is natural and at home he does not intend to restrain himself. Okay, I decided, I’ll hit you with your own weapon. She did not do hair removal, ate garlic for the night, cracked near him, sat down to cut her nails in the zone of his visibility... What he said ENDELF WE HAVE A NORMAL FAMILY!!! to