bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110429
 09.03.2015
Do you want to download one song instead of the entire album? CUE you, not a separate track!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №110428
 09.03.2015
Changing people at work
First, they boast that "they know English well"
and then? trying to tell the news about the volcano, can't pronounce Yellowstone
Translate the "yellow stone" into English
Your eyes are opened like a mad man.

and :)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110427
 09.03.2015
Biology@vk: In the U.S. there was a case where a plastic surgeon used injections of automotive seal and cement, which was very inexpensive relative to high-quality plastic surgeries.
Zloradskij: He made their mouth a brick.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №110426
 09.03.2015
Here is. You can also watch videos about programming in the Java language. One looked and the other. You're looking for a better and clearer video... And in a couple of hours you realize that you're watching a video about how to assemble a house from light bulbs. How I got to this video, I don’t understand.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110425
 09.03.2015
People are superfluous, but money is never.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №110424
 09.03.2015
Yes, to fuck up teachers and psychologists with their early development! I also feel like I’ve gone.
Our three-year-old daughter tells terrible stories in the spirit of the gangsters of the 90s about "a good poor uncle, who had a lot of children to feed and a beautiful wife, but with dull eyes. Then he was put in prison, where he spoke to the birds. And then the evil uncle shot him, and he completely died, and he was buried in a warehouse... in a warehouse. And the wife went to another uncle, also a good one, and still gave birth.
Mothers from the venue look at me with round eyes, like Sasha White’s wife, and they stop talking. And I am saddened to think that it was too early for the daughter to tell about the duel between Pushkin and Dantes... And the whole family of Pushkin-Lanskiy’s shouldn’t have been painted yet... And the poem “I sit behind the roof in the raw prison” was clearly not for her age...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №110423
 09.03.2015
Yes, all the classic Disney cartoons are about walking in the garden and singing, and then the birds will sit on your arms, and then a cool man will come and take you.
yyy: And only "Mulan" explains what to do if the birds are not very hands-on, and the inner rod requires adventures... yeah, xxx?

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №110422
 09.03.2015
There is a displacement of women and old people under the NBU - there is no Maidan.
There is censorship, even the Ukrainian media – there is no Maidan.
The hryvnia fell four times and further - there is no Maidan.
No one has taken it into the European Union – there is no Maidan.
The oligarchs are also in power - there is no Maidan.
Unlimited authorities / judges / prosecutors - there is no Maidan.
Prices are rising, public services are rising – there is no Maidan.
Pensions and wages are reduced – there is no Maidan.
The visa-free regime with the European Union has not been removed, and it has been "turned" - there is no Maidan.

I wonder how many other idiots believe that Maidan was "popular and self-organized"?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №110421
 09.03.2015
Wish me happiness in my personal life... Being single so bad... I’m just on the verge...
And let it go into karma.)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №110420
 09.03.2015
About gifts, allegedly, "masculine": on March 8th, my beloved mother-in-law gave me the flat-collars, which I had almost dreamed of. I have been using them for 3 years and every time in mind, and if possible and out loud, thank you for such a successful gift.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №110419
 09.03.2015
To allocate $40 million to Ukraine for the fight against corruption is the same as to allocate 40 kilograms of heroin to Afghanistan for the fight against drug mafia.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №110418
 09.03.2015
Megadrot: So you will come? We already covered the field, we all came.
I’ll check out my house and call a taxi.
Will you be silent? - I'll call a car soon.
Megadrot: Listen, we changed our mind, don't come. the guys decided to call Olya
Nate: Why?? to
Megadrot: look at the house better...)))

[ + 33 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110417
 09.03.2015
A strange war. We are shown hungry children in the DPR, right away the competition of Miss DPR - with flags and flags

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №110416
 09.03.2015
The disappointed husband came from the third hobbit. One of the discontents is that the dragon was killed in the 15th minute of the film. I cannot agree with him. At home with two children (2 years, 3 months) the same 15 minutes I watched 4 hours. Until it has progressed. This is the series!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №110415
 09.03.2015
My wife congratulated me on March 8. I bought a bag of goat milk. Fresh Goat Cheese. Portrait of a cute goat on the label.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №110414
 09.03.2015
You buy your favorite hamburger and grind it for 10 minutes.
--------------------
This is for a teenager, and for a man it is like coming to a favorite restaurant, order an appetite, then eat a couple of slices of any fruit, drink all this with a couple of gloves of mineral (to remove the aftertaste of fruits) and only then proceed to the dish that has just been prepared specifically for you.
But if you do the analogy with the mac, then it ran into the shelter, grabbed the first one who got in and began to hold right in the vestibule.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №110413
 09.03.2015
Not to promote female chauvinism, but to put the male goats on a bag of goat milk... they did it without thinking. Are they buying?
*I repeat - there was no statement that goats are worse than goats objectively, but in the context of milk, I am sure, they are inappropriate.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №110412
 09.03.2015
A couple of days ago, a young man borrowed from me a single-use shaver (in the sense of new, from a package) and after using it for a while was upset by the quality of the result, and then sympathized that I had to suffer every time.

Justice has been restored! I, by the way, the first girl to get a shave on March 8th (good, by the way, dear)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №110411
 08.03.2015
I told the girl a compliment that for me she was the center of the world, the core of my universe. The devil dragged me to add: “You are my supermassive black hole.” I had to make an excursion to astronomy.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №110410
 08.03.2015
Oh, dictate my husband's list of drugs and wait for everything to bring the necessary and in the right dosages...My head doesn't even knock, goes to the pharmacy, calls me and under my dictation buys...What's special here? It is normal. I’ve seen many men in supermarkets picking up a food cart with lists or dictating...What? “The king cannot think of everything; the king must think of what is important.”

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