Listening to neighbors:
Are you going somewhere for the weekend?
We have two dogs and a wife.

From Habr, from the discussion of the cosacks of printing:
XHH: And we have pantone colors (not CMYK printed) picked up by a daltonic. Through the survey of others, “Well, these colors match, right?” the position of a person was given after the 90s.

I was in shoes today. Mother and 5 year old daughter.
Mother with a loud voice:
The daughter! Do not bring me!
A girl with a misunderstanding:
And why?

This is fucking:
here here :
I broke a range of one online sports store, saw pink, boxing, blade, gloves!

and what? Women can also box, don’t you think?

And what, guys can not take pink as pink as a woman? For example, I carry a pink pen and on the question a"what pen is pink? he he (standard dumb hop-goat laugh)" I answer, and the color is funny, I like, there are claims?. Stop coloring the genders, not the children.

My cat’s name is Entropy. Every time I feed her, I increase my entropy.

Not for the weak. After marriage, contextual advertising in the UK no longer offers the services of a photographer or a shirt... She asks without insults:"Does her husband drink?and "
Immediately suspicions arose.

I am ashamed. She took her daughter from school. Back there are the same little schoolchildren and mothers. Loudly with expression. I turned around and told them about the five-storey mat, which I remembered when I was a nurse in the morge. The children were frightened. What had to be done?

The Loans:

"With Mobile-Review:
What is Android Watch?
Yyy: Android is translated as Android or hermaphrodite. Watch is translated as watch, watch, watch, watch, watch. Therefore, the Android Watch is the watch of the hermaphrodite, the watch of the android, the watch of the android, the watch of the hermaphrodite, the watch of the hermaphrodite. These definitions are more appropriate than ever for <models>"

What, in the name of Chaos, is android=hermafrodite? This is an androgyne, smoke the already relentlessly found on this resource Wikipedia. And Android is a chile-like robot!! to

I went to the corner to smoke a carpet

From the story of one professor listened to in the train: “They fall in love, lay eggs, and the larvae come out of them.”

A beautiful Sunday morning. It smelled delicious from the window, and the whole room smelled stupid. In a couple of minutes I can't stand, I climb, shake my head, smell. I can't see the source of the smell, but another head shakes on the side. It turns and smells.

by bezdna.su

Once the Ukrainian militias were simple men with hunting guns. They were sent against them, and they were brought against them. There were tanks, there were tanks. Then the planes. The U.S. has introduced ships into the Black Sea. In vain they are.

She: Well tell me
He is: What?
She: Well tell me I’m the best and the most beautiful. And that I have the most beautiful thing, and that you constantly think of me and want me.
You are the best and the most beautiful. You are the most beautiful, I always think of you and I want you.
You’re saying something dumb. I don’t believe any of your words.

He almost fell in love, but she spoke.

There is a member of our company, one of our founders. The man is not poor, to his 65 years of age is fully assured. And all that worried him was that his neck did not hurt. It looks like it’s dependent on age, and it doesn’t hurt. He decided to investigate the case. We were on a trip to Munich. This is the case and they took him with them. Munich is famous for doctors. We have partners in Germany, and they helped identify him in one clinic for examination. The clinic is expensive and famous, who has not been treated there - and Bono of U2 and Hosni Mubarak and a bunch of people famous.

We pursued the affairs, and this person went to the examination. So there though the clinic is expensive, but as he later expressed – “wrong.” Nothing was found there, not even the smallest illness. Healthy you say. They took two and a half hundred euros in two days and sent them back. He even got upset.

But I did not give up. On the way home, we went to our doctors. examined again.
Well, our family met him as a native, all sorts of analyses were appointed, a few days in the offices were chased and eventually issued:

- Yes, happiness - they inform him - great that you turned to us in time, and in a week you would have been brought to us on an ambulance, and you urgently need several medical courses to go, something serious, you can not hesitate! Let us now fight with the consequences of all your diseases, once so delayed, etc. and t.p...

In short, he goes to them now as to work, in a week he poured them more than eighty thousand wooden, preparations of various purchased, something there in the food refused, but happy now - until it shines.

That’s – he says – the right doctors, not the fact that the Hanss are unsuspecting.

And now go and find out now, where was the medical mistake here – in Germany or in us? But, most likely, the Germans did not look at how to drink.

And our doctors are now suffering, correcting these shit.

Free medicine starts with paid bills. A paid medicine with free bacillus.

Discuss rare names in the forum

The two sons are named Leo, Arthur, and Louis. Everything would be nothing if the name was not King.

– No, these waterslides endure a long time... and then leave.
What do the virgins do at this time?
We cry...
All the time when the waters are suffering?
“No, when the watersleepers suffer... we fuck their brains... and then we just cry.”

In the distant times, when the daughter was small and the husband was the comforter of the shop, we had a cat. Moses was lovingly named and rejoiced in her wonderful name until the birthday of the Komsomol. Oh, these all-knowing drunk comsomolks! "What is this Mosiah, with such eggs," said a fighting friend. "This is Muscat!" That is what it is. Once we were resting in the forest base, and the cat was lost. I found it, but in the process of searching a lot of confused other vacationers with loud screams: "Muscat! Muscat!" Some even jumped out with the bad guys, thinking - to spill the trade. If anyone does not know, there were times of dry law. These are the names...

Today I met a man with a character like mine.
YYY: Didn’t you want to stifle him after 10 minutes of communication? and ;)
XXX: It’s hard to admit, but yes! and :)

On the subject of mail.
worked 1 day in express delivery (in time, personally, to the door): client1 - on the day of delivery to work took the day off, client2- telephone number for communication "disabled for non-payment", client3- "we have no warehouse today, take no one", client 4- telephone for communication "this type of communication is not available for the subscriber"... so it worked 1 day. The fact that the correspondence did not arrive on time, the fault is not only "postalion"...