The Flying Walk
I came for a seagull.
Escaped from the eyes.
The Mechovoy Pidaras. 

A wonderful dialogue:
Batteries in the mouse
Neighbor: so you have more in the refrigerator.
Husband: there is the size of another... эххх... you’ll have to pull the toys
And here is my cry on the whole apartment: X** I will not give!!! to

The neighbor has a fairly wealthy mimic, but here he even swallowed over Jim Carrey.

Osin: He wants to be fast, cheap and high-quality, so he still has a lot to understand ;)

All of the above.
From the dictatorship of the group: a fun chimpanzee (chimpanzee)

My son is 2 years old and doesn’t like to shave. I persuaded him to go and cut his hair. I say to my husband - go ahead, until he has changed his mind, and the husband does not want to go, and this one gives out: Son, with whom do you want to go, with mom or dad?
Who can guess where I’ll take him now?
I write this post on a women’s forum, almost word in word, the first comment from a friend killed:
The husband? of injury?

In women with small breasts there is one big plus – conscience does not allow them to attach great importance to the size of your penis.

I will tell you my sad story. In school, I studied quite well, thanks to the love of reading, I wrote various dictates and generally appreciated and respected Russian language.
One day we went through phrases. The authors of the textbook believed that we should already have a certain stock of idioms, and therefore proposed to name phraseology on the picture and explain its meaning. There were eight paintings, there were eight people in one row, so the teacher said to do it in a row.
And here is my turn. In the picture in front of me is a horse, covered with apples on the neck. It is clear. "A horse in apples," I say, "I have a horse".
How many times can I repeat that phraséology is not interpreted in a direct sense! The teacher cried. A horse in apples is not a horse. You know, say the pigs in oranges, when a man, roughly speaking, has eaten? Here "the horse in the apples" is the same!

teachers (the teachers do not call their language).

In the fifth grade he received the only 4 in the year in Russian language. I don't remember what I used to do (I've only started after this incident).

In the control composition, in the phrase "roses the sunset", suddenly a part of the root appeared "weets", and "roses" and "o" - presets. Therefore, "it is necessary to write " once", and you are generally clever." =/

Formate the assholes, the ugly hobbit. The naked.

Everyone thought that Russia was on its knees, and she was just putting the ropes on the ropes.

NagleChok: In short, painting with oil
NagleChok: Coming to their ancestors at their home yesterday
NagleChok: Father undermined and let us play with Nastycha
NagleChok: Well, my younger sister, so, swept with soft toys, well, in my childhood, I got 2 rubles of crazy clouds from machines, well, their chihuahua fell under the hand in an unclean folder. Well, imagine this picture – I open the door and see our Cadet flying out the window 3! The floor. I think it’s Han’s dog. But no, this monster crashed into a tree and remained on it.
NagleChok: But that’s not the whole picture yet. We do not have forestry, but the road is under construction and we went there to ask for a forestry.
NagleChok: Do you even imagine this picture? The buoy grandmother tried to explain to them that our dog was on a tree and it had to be removed! The men stand out and don’t believe, of course!
NagleChok: Well, how can they explain how a dog is on a tree? Shortly while his father was filming him, he also fell on his face. Probably a vengeance.
NagleChok: Morality: Don’t wear soft toys while you have cats or dogs in the house!

A granddaughter walks out a dog, instead of a guide, uses a red laser indicator light.
-
But here I have a dog on the spot from the laser ray does not react... the cat is wearing, trying to catch, and when the dog dedicated, she first looked at the spot on the floor, and then on me with the view of "well you are like a child straight."
True, her reaction quickly changed to the time to hunt a cat, the causal link between a fire running on the floor and a running cat (which the dog is so pleasant to drive into the corner and eat for his ass) caught quickly.

When you’re a child, the worst thing in life is to watch the candy run out. Nothing changes when you grow up.

...and in the meantime, a small dwarf dwarf approached the Yellowstone ghetto to throw the All-Power Chip there.

The best way to get rid of phone spam is not to throw the phone, but quietly put it on the table and keep doing your business. Verified and works.

My husband calls the workshop.
I have a problem. Printer for 7 years. At first he worked normally. Then he refused to take the paper - but after a time. And yesterday I got in the rice and stopped taking paper for printing at all. How much is it worth?

Yesterday I found a cat in the lower abdomen some subcutaneous bag.terrified.tracked to the veterinarian.doctor me,expanded my eyes - here is this bag?- I, frightened to swallow my eyes even more,I answer-yes.doctor leaned to me and whispered,so I opened my mouth-This is a animal. :)

XXX is Hi! Please order 20 mice, we have 2 in stock.
YYY: Somewhat quickly the mice in the expenditure. Do you have cats?
and the cattle))

Talk to a friend from the village.
Hi, how about myself?
Friends: Yes, the situation is shit. They shoot me here, I hide behind a tree. I'm not very comfortable talking now, let me call you later?
And all this with a calm, smooth voice. The harsh morals.

In the dictionary of the harsh Chelyabinsk six-class student: it did not get up.