bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №95627
 21.03.2014
The internet disappeared. My daughter is wandering around the apartment, suffering from worklessness.
I would go, I would walk. I didn’t sit at home at night when I was 17.
D: With whom? I do not have a guy. I will go to study in a big city... and I will change providers there, like gloves! I stand up to everyone’s death! I will not forgive a lost package. They will still run after me!
I: Hey, grandchildren, I understand that I can’t wait at all.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №95626
 21.03.2014
About the Referendums.
In 1991, a referendum was held on the preservation of the Soviet Union. 76% voted in favour of preserving the Union.
Russia is the successor of the USSR.
On March 15, 1996, the State Duma of the Russian Federation, as the successor of the USSR, recognized the results of the 1991 referendum as legally significant. And, in accordance with them, repealed the resolution of the Supreme Soviet on the denunciation of the Treaty on the formation of the USSR.

That is, just tell no one, the legal Soviet Union still exists.

Several separatists gathered around. Laws must be observed.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №95625
 21.03.2014
And how do you think this is paid in Europe and the United States? And how much, admit to yourself, your studies in science would be in demand abroad?
and...
1) A few of my friends have just left abroad (and those who do science - and, by the way, people of creative professions). So, this is paid there incomparably higher: so that you can live, not exist. You’re probably very far from that if you think it’s the same.)
I have thoughts about leaving, too. With a great desire, it is quite real. But – you can’t believe it and maybe it sounds funny – I love my country and my city, I’m afraid that I’ll be tormented by nostalgia.
It is not specifically my studies in science that are paid extremely low, but my studies in science in Russia in general. Again - ask how much a docent and a candidate of sciences earn on average. The state of science and education indicates that everything is sad in the country.
The connection between the education of the younger generation (I am not only about the desire to read, by the way, I wrote - about ignorance in general, low level of knowledge) and the decline in the quality of education / problems with receiving it - in my opinion, direct. By the way, I not only mentioned the closure of the budget magistrates, but also other points.
3) Oh, the difference is precisely that somewhere a person can postpone his/her life for old age (and worthy), and somewhere he can survive it at best.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95624
 21.03.2014
here here :

My life will never be the same, I grabbed kiwi with my skin.
It is...
From the same series: Thank you to my friends for giving me a Bulgarian (angle grinder) for my doctor, which I wanted for so long for the country affairs. It was for her that we opened cocos all night, with the juice of which we then drank whiskey.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95623
 21.03.2014
XXX: Ukraine will really hit the hardcore. First there were archery and catapults on the Maidan. Recently there was a barrage at the border.

I understand, now the guys need to build a zigzag.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №95622
 21.03.2014
to this:

This is the life of the hero:

I also deal with retirees (not entirely hypothetical). You just open your eyes and look around - you will immediately see how they live.

By the way, the apartment issue is also very acute (the ratio of wages and apartments prices). For many years, I have lived in a 1-room apartment with two other adults.
____________________________________________
There is no need to talk about the retirees how bad they are living. my grandmother eats and meat and bread with oil is enough, and for 1.5 years 200 thousand rubles accumulated not at the expense of her life and gave me to buy an apartment. who worked, he and the pensions normal now receives, and who complained about life, those and now cry and talk like everyone heroically
____________________________________________
You are Galvin?

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №95621
 21.03.2014
XHH: Kola is an intelligent, he knows English well and C++ and still does everything.
Is this the colla in which my computer has the status of a satanic machine"?

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95620
 21.03.2014
to this:
#23(2014-03-19 13:47)
In the brilliant work of Strugatsky, "The inhabited island" tells about a world whose inhabitants are constantly exposed to zombie radiation. Several times a day the intensity increases – then the majority falls into patriotic ecstasy, and the smaller, not prone to zombies, experiences physical pain.
The radiation generator was installed by Rudolf Sikorsky, a Earthman, a galactic security worker who decided to make the world more correct.

Not for ignorance and blasphemy of the Strugacki brothers. Psychogeners were invented and applied in Saraksha long before the appearance of the earthly. Read more carefully

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №95619
 20.03.2014
We discussed with colleague (k) "Nymphomaniac" Lars von Trier.
I: Did you watch "Nymphomaniac"?
Q: I watched the first part. Until the second hand reaches.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №95618
 20.03.2014
The only city to which this applies is Berlin.

The question is that the meaning of this has changed a lot)))

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95617
 20.03.2014
From Habr:

XXX is
Of all that I have tried Lightning is the most convenient:
1st It can be pulled on any side.
2nd It holds very tight, but is easily inserted and removed.
Three Small and beautiful (subjectively)

YYY
My girlfriend says the same to me.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №95616
 20.03.2014
I can’t tolerate being regretted!
Cumi: You can’t do it?
Nika : Yes.
Cumi: The poor...

[ + 23 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95615
 20.03.2014
The ancient Ukrainian city of Taganrog.

Taganrog was founded in 1698 by Peter the First and became the first Russian naval base, the first Russian port on the open sea coast and the first city in Russia built on a regular plan.

[ + 18 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №95614
 20.03.2014
The sick:

In the brilliant work of Strugatsky, "The inhabited island" tells about a world whose inhabitants are constantly exposed to zombie radiation. Several times a day the intensity increases – then the majority falls into patriotic ecstasy, and the smaller, not prone to zombies, experiences physical pain...I watch Russian television: apparently, the phase of increased intensity has come. Most of the population is beaten in patriotic ecstasy, and I am sick and angry to impossibility.

He is sick and angry, and he looks and looks, there would be no book to read.
A schizophrenic masochist. to the psychiatrist.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №95613
 20.03.2014
If admin cleans the basket, it’s depression.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №95612
 20.03.2014
Comments on the video "Dragon in the Verkhovna Rada":
PS1X is O! Rada worked in the regular mode!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №95611
 20.03.2014
are confused.

The label on the bank (conserves).
"Calmar with the taste of crab". Who ate whom?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №95610
 20.03.2014
In the office of the chief of the shop stand on the closet three cushpo of different sizes: in the large a lush green plant, on average a few small grooves with leaves, and in the smallest, located in the middle, only the soil. Each cash is signed "Names" - Tychon, Tychon and... Tychošnik.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №95609
 20.03.2014
I remember a daughter in the first grade decides: “My grandfather and grandmother had 5 goats. They ate one. How many goats are left, first is the reef. Hussey is sorry. Then he starts adding all-grandfather, grandmother and goose. I say – what are you doing? Why do you add Grandpa and Grandpa? She thinks for a long time, and then shouts joyfully – I understand... They need to be taken from the goats! And then the goats will be whole!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №95608
 20.03.2014
Last year’s story took a new turn:
It was under the new year.
Deep evening, closer to night. Under the windows they smoke, and in the whole voice a bunch of students-puddles. Mom can't stand it and decides to punish this codle: takes the camera with the flash and clicks "in the emptiness" several times from the window to scare. Students on the street instantly silence, after a few seconds the most courageous shouts:
"What are you doing here?" What are you doing here?"
"Yes", - answers mom, - "You violate the rules of residence, and so - you will be expelled and places will be released!
Within a minute, the whole bunch of smokers evaporated.
and our days.
The incident is gradually forgotten. Evening is closer to night. Beyond the windows, they smoke again and whistle with an unpleasant whispering female voice. The mom takes the camera and makes a couple of “targeting” clicks (must have a flash to notice) from the window. There was a long and thoughtful silence behind the windows. The question is "Why are you there – do you photograph us"? Nifiga like this - a thoughtful voice from the crowd (very similar to the previous one) broadcasts:
I know, she will show these pictures to the commander, and he will put them on us afterwards. I have to go out and")))))
Public Saratoga Radio directly in action

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna