bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №93627
 07.02.2014
My wife wants a trainer. Knowing the experience of friends, suggested to buy a hangover immediately. Insulted...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №93626
 07.02.2014
Discussed trip to Morocco, route and composition of participants:
Q: Did you think or did you think?
YYY: It will probably disappear
XXX: What is it?
yyy: Agadir tarudant uarsazat sugar marrakesh emsuayra casablanca
yyy: Route for 10 days)
Zzzz: I think you called someone.
X: I thought it was about N, too.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №93625
 07.02.2014
I should shave my beard as a girl leaves me. I start growing again – it comes back. I have to shave again. He goes again. Is it specifically?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №93624
 07.02.2014
dimitri_jv: News headline - "Krasnoyarsk police stopped selling alcohol at night".

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93623
 07.02.2014
XXX: I would fuck you!! to
yyy: better tell me what to do if the hot keys do not work in libreoffice?? to
XXX: What will happen to me?! to
YYY: Well I just thought that since you like to fuck you probably have Linux, it would help.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №93622
 07.02.2014
X: Why are the tourist backpacks whispering?and ;
y: and this is that when a bomber crashed into the abyss to imitate...

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №93621
 07.02.2014
Comments to the news "The Bank of Russia and the police agreed to fight bitcoin together":
XX: There are no other problems in the economy. You can also do bitcoins.
YYY: Yes, thanks to God. We live in graceful times.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №93620
 07.02.2014
xxX: By the way, I remembered, at the expert council on computer games, which was in Douma, there was a guy told that they had a game, where it was necessary to find a cat, so they suddenly found that someone spent 100 tons. On some improvements there game, they began to call him, it turned out that yes, he did not accidentally, but intentionally spent them, it was some high-ranking official from the regions.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №93619
 07.02.2014
We went to a taxi yesterday, we talked on the eternal theme:"a woman driver".And a taxi driver tells the story:
I pulled out, he says, some girl out of the cottage, asked, how it made her get there.I say: Well you are, sign what you do not see?
And she: I say, I go, I see - the turn is dangerous, I decided not to turn and went straight...

The hell of logic, blink))

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №93618
 07.02.2014
WAN: Well why don’t you bring the work to the end?
Wanna: Well I...
Start of.Well, say, if you fuck your wife and you don’t finish – will she be happy?
A: Well this is...
Start of.Well, and here too. End up please!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №93617
 07.02.2014
It was cold at 20. And the fact that someone in this world is colder, I do not get warmer.
Stop measuring downsides, now winter and cold at this time of year is NOR-MAL-NO! Here they will hit you in Siberia or us in Peter the frost in July, then we will sympathize with each other, and now let us reconcile with the weather that has formed over millennia and we will warm up on each other.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №93616
 07.02.2014
Working in technical support:
A client called me, the company said, I am a accountant, they call me so. here you sold me a fig program, nothing works, here red, there was not held, here was not counted, now come and fix everything to me
I’m trying to explain to her that we don’t fix user errors (free of charge), but if she has questions about the methodology of working with the program, I’ll gladly answer her.
Q: What are the mistakes? I say user errors, that is, those errors that were made by you as a user when working with the program.
She is so superstitious - you didn't understand me at all, I said, I'm a accountant, not a user!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №93615
 07.02.2014
You are as fat as well...
I just wiped out the cream.
I am not about the face.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №93614
 07.02.2014
Good fairy: And what do you want? and :)
arxont: let’s connect with you at the first level of the OSI model

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №93613
 07.02.2014
This is:
as it is in our way: to get a corporate disk with the name autograph of the performer, be lazy to open it, get it, insert it in the ROM.. it is easier to find it in the net.

— — — —
In fact, smart, in a few years will sell as a collection rarity. Unopened disc with autograph of the artist.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №93612
 07.02.2014
Why do children talk about tooth fairies, I don’t mind! To feel part of an enlightened Europe?
yyy: I gave my childhood mouse teeth ""
ZZZ: I am a dentist

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №93611
 07.02.2014
I sit behind the comp, I write a diploma, papa (p) suits:
P) What are you doing?
I write a diploma
(p) aaah, or I think why serious you sit, straight like my mom, when the borscht is cooking.)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №93610
 07.02.2014
Judging by the trajectory of the movement of the Olympic fire, it could simply be sent by Russian mail.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №93609
 07.02.2014
xxx: Who uses the air humidifier, please tell me: which one do you have? Are there problems with the compatibility of the humidifier with cats?
Yyy: At first we had a simple ultrasound, but it had to be abandoned - left a white plaque all over the house, whatever water we used (from the crane, from the filter, drinking from bottles). Yes, and the cats in his wire bite over - to the word about compatibility with cats :)

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93608
 07.02.2014
There is no toilet there. It can’t even be called a sandwich, it’s a sandwich.

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