bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №93687
 09.02.2014
Question: How to determine that the cheese with mold is gone?

Answer: He is nowhere.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №93686
 08.02.2014
On the official website of Sochi 2014 there is a video of the opening. Released to YouTube and blocked for copyright infringement

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №93685
 08.02.2014
Today my grandmother, almost 90 years old, asks: How old are you, 25?
28 soon
She (surprisingly): No fucking herself...meaning 30 soon?
See also: AGA
B: What do you do when I get my first child at 35?
I : probably :)
B: Yes, they are on the fucking, don’t give birth at all:)))

I felt like a heroine of some art house :) but I laughed :)

[ + 43 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93684
 08.02.2014
In Sochi, the correspondent of the foreign media was deprived of accreditation for the fact that he broke the door pen in the hotel and photographed them.

The photo of the rusty water in the Sochi hotel turned out to be a two-year-old photo from an article on the problems of utilities in Ukraine.

When there are no problems, they have to be invented. Don’t give god, the fan with a known substance will stop.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №93683
 08.02.2014
From the Zoo:

Not a cat or a dog. I want something else. And it is desirable that it does not require much care.

YYY: The Tarakans They are silent, unpretentious, breed well, create an atmosphere of family comfort, crawling onto the table during lunch and swirling with their eyebrows, welcoming the owner.

Or the mice. Beautiful gray pieces that will run around the house. And in the winter and all the beauty - lower your feet in the boots, and there warm and soft, the mice with the heat of their little bodies heated your boots.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №93682
 08.02.2014
I like these touch screens, use the app for a year, then finger dirt from the screen erase - learned about three new features!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №93681
 08.02.2014
- One of me in the numbers X X II seemed to be an inappropriate word?
So, how much of your mind has been wiped up once you’ve seen that shit?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93680
 08.02.2014
I don’t have a car, but there’s a huge list of songs I imagine like I’m going to turn on when I’m driving!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №93679
 08.02.2014
Buy a shirt in the store.
I: I like this one.
G: You got all black to wear, buy better green!
I: What do you not know? Every man should have a little black shirt.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №93678
 08.02.2014
> >elik is now uploading an update, says there healed some bugs.
This is FIGN.
I have an e-cigarette, I call it ‘cossack’ because I’m swallowing it with my own mix of fragrances. Charge from USB.
Here 10 years ago to say that I struck the straw with an orange and smoked from the TV - here is where 03 called b :)

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №93677
 08.02.2014
I am alone when I performed the anthem at the Olympics, I sang the Party... Lenin’s power of the people leads us to the triumph of communism.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №93676
 08.02.2014
HH: I understood it all! They need energy!
The cat is upset, you mourn, and you start to lick it.
When you smooth a cat, static electricity is produced, the cat accumulates it and transmits it to its true owners!
Not the cat! Not the cat, the fucking cat!! to

[ + 43 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93675
 08.02.2014
Tell me, am I one of those idiots who still can’t deal with the fucking Windows Media Player and its library?! to

one one. Normal people take it all off and put any hollow player out of hundreds of existing ones to their taste.

[ + 87 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93674
 08.02.2014
Here some write like a Google troll, painting their logo in rainbow colors.
And the American figurewriter one passion as frightened, saying that he will perform with a rainbow manicure.
Dear pederast sympathetic, you can paint the rainbow wherever convenient.
For us, radiation is just radiation. A beautiful and joyful phenomenon of nature. We painted it ourselves, and we will paint it wherever we want (I also speak as a designer): on the Olympic shirt, on the walls of kindergartens, on the packaging of candy.

Or do you think we will abandon it because of the fantasies of unhappy sick people who chose it as their “symbol”?
I say to all normal Russians: Don’t wait.
Okay_

[ + 3 - ] Comment quote №93673
 08.02.2014
Bloody terror... You still say you believe in the Holocaust

And you would go, shit, under Auschwitz. The atmosphere would squeeze. The book came out - you immediately believe what you read, like the last village saliva idiot. Do not reproduce. And never become a teacher, you are a disgusting, stupid, immoral grey.

[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93672
 08.02.2014
About the recent:

..."Where did you see me?" And when you were going to swim, when we were sitting with you, I was always looking at you in the window over the door."Slavik: "And I!"Dan: "And I!"The others were also there. All of. of Birth. It was as if I had no pants :(

Well, okay, let’s say, I believe that a crowd of guys could look at the girl through the bathroom window and stay unnoticed. When it comes to voyeurism, some ninja skills are raised in times. I can’t understand anything else: people come to your house to sit and talk, and you... leave them to wash. This is a new kind of hospitality, right?

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №93671
 08.02.2014
Working with collective consciousness

Hello, O collective consciousness! Tell me the name of one dark cartoon I saw when I was a kid.

There was a dog who in childhood moved the tail of a children’s railway steam truck and she has since laid on passing rails. She lived with her grandmother in a tall house, which then collapsed from the railway station built nearby.
There was either a sleepy, or a stubborn cyclist-athlete with pumped beds, chewing from a deep bowl some bite.
There was a poor grandmother who joined with others and started playing with them in an ensemble, in the ensemble one played on a bicycle wheel, the other on a bullish newspaper and something else.
There were frogs that these grandmothers cooked for lunch.
----------------
This is "Trio from Belville". Nothing is dark! A great cartoon! A pleasant view :)

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №93670
 08.02.2014
and diligent:

You are all so naive. I can ask for a passport at least from my 60-year-old grandmother, and I can’t sell her cigarettes and alcohol if she doesn’t show me that passport. Because the law is so. Not because you look so ugly. I could ask every fifth. by a number. Unfairly every third. And it’s not because I’ve got my free time and I’m crazy, but because I have an order from the boss and they can be fined. But when I still pay attention to how, blatantly, the undoubtedly thirty-year-old chicken rejoices in her sudden youth in the eyes of the cashier, then I am, of course, frightened.

You have to go to work with your talents. Beautiful shape, a personal cabin, a turniket, maybe even a cobra from a gun will give. You will like.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №93669
 08.02.2014
Comments on Pikachu:

I have deep Russian roots. My name is Tymoshenko. I live in Russia. I am the embodiment of the USSR!
YYY: Look not to break up.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №93668
 08.02.2014
My companion loves Baptists and Jehovah’s Witnesses. He walks on the sidewalk, and in front of him, half a hundred meters away, two such "typical" people come to meet him. Uncle aged under 50-60 and a guy aged 25. "That is all He thinks, “I’m crawling and crawling". Then they said to him, “Hello, do you believe in God?” And only he wanted to ask them about his address or something like that, as they continue: “You see, our pastor/archbishop (I don’t remember who governs them all there) had a revelation from God, and we distribute consecrated condoms on his instructions. Do you want to buy?" To say that he was stunned — say nothing. He silently turned and went on. And only after a few minutes in the space, he said: B*t! They are geniuses!

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