P is a boy, D is a girl.
The scholarship has arrived.
P: Agha, 2960
D is 5850.
Q: I have a member more.
D: And thank God...

XX: I have an idea. Once such a drunkard has gone with the deterioration of education in the country, then, probably, it makes sense to find in every subject the key points that you need to crush the young breed.
WOW: Let me explain.
XX: For example, a geography teacher should hardly invest in the memory of students that Russia is on the same latitude with Canada, not with the United States, so wait in Moscow for the weather, as in Washington (which is approximately on the latitude of Madrid) - the top of idiotism. But if you want to be equal to the United States, equal to Alaska, the Aleutian Islands.
WOW: It is interesting. And yet?
XX: The teacher of chemistry should find out that of all alcohols you can only use the ethyl, which is C2H5OH, and then it will be digested.
UUU: In anticipation of the new examples, will I dare to assume that they relate to Russian language and mathematics?
XX: -Tsya and -Tsya is generally as a table of multiplication to know. Which few know, by the way. I am speaking to you as a math teacher.
You know, don’t tell chemistry teachers about your ideas.
It was ? ? ? ?

"Nick must be original"

A long time ago, just starting to use the Internet, I chose a nick from one little-known book. When I wanted to read it again, I searched in the internet, but it wasn’t there! Nick was absolutely unique. A couple of years later I tried to find this book again - I did not find it, but I found two more with my nickname. It was the first time I really wanted to kill a man. Two people, to be precise.

And the most heroic is to twist a pot of pigeons in a forty-degree frost at high humidity!

Our tester is very bulging, everyone knows about it. Today when a man from the neighboring department came in and asked, “Warner, do you have an alcohol tester?” we showed him our tester without any humor. He thought for a long time about what we wanted to say, and we, in turn, thought for a long time about what he didn’t like about our tester we showed him.
When it came to us that he was asking for the device, we hit and began to roar loudly. Chel, apparently, thought we were idiots and left without saying anything.

I invented my religion. I will worship the dream.
Tagged with: "sleep"

I hear the sound of the iron curtain falling down.

There is a radio shop in the city. The owner of the store does not like the word "radio details"... Dialogue by phone with him (he is also the seller):
I, - Allo, are these radio details?
He is – No. (He hangs the phone)
I think I was wrong with the number. I call again:
I, - Allo, are these radio details?
He is – No. (He hangs the phone)
I suspect something...I call back:
Hello, is this a store?
The pause...
He is yes.
Do you have radio details?
He, with anger in his voice, was not radiated! The electronic components.
I am, and I will be. (He lifted the phone)

The cryptocurrency exchange:
Noctradamus: kesha587, moreover, the home plants of Russians emit oxygen that terrorists can breathe, according to MPs.

Irina: I noticed that you feel somewhat calmer and more confident at work when you’re on vacation.

A German doctor made the correct diagnosis thanks to the series "Doctor House"
I thought it would happen someday xD :)

... will anyone tell all these people about paper sparkles or will they die, sick, ignorant?

In universe the same) I take the exam on the comp, in the tests. With me I have a printed tap, in which of 1000 tests there are only those 25-30, in which you need to insert numbers (well, I don't go for such tests, they don't go). The rest I just learned.
The gender of the group is copied from the phones.
I am burning by a teacher with a paper fork, I think everything will be taken away now, if not expelled.
And he instead rejoiced as the child began, say, so long ago did not see students with paper spurs, all with phones and phones.

Case from life: broke the newly purchased vacuum cleaner of the company "XHHH" I call the warranty workshop I talk to the girl operator:
(I)- Service center of the company "xhx"?
(D) Yes what do you have?
(I)- the vacuum cleaner broke, he is still on warranty, wanted to know your service address
Do you have a repair or replacement?
I don’t know, I would like to replace.
D – What about him?
(I) I don’t know...he’s whispering loudly, but he doesn’t whisper.
(D) Here you are all the same men, unless they are replaced immediately.
(I) Emm girl, are we still talking about my vacuum cleaner?
(D) Go you... short guts
P.S I didn’t call back ?

Zombiracer: We had one big boss who didn’t build anything out of himself. I was riding a motorcycle. I smoked an electronic cigarette. We gave him a cinderella on a motorcycle. He was delighted :)

We got married on 21.12.12 at the end of the world.
And after a certain time, we started all down, what we wanted to not be able to do, my husband's business is not profitable.

The commentary:
For the first time I meet a person who still believes in the end of the world over the past year %(

Today, my younger cousin, still a high school student, opened my eyes:
Q: What are you working on?
I: Yes Yes
C: And why then? Did you learn badly in school?
I am :?! to
Only those who study poorly work.
I remembered my acquaintances, and indeed...

PivoKot: So what do these informal people know of all kinds of willingness to oppose themselves to society?

In 1985, after buying a green aniline dye and welding in it under my mom's guidance knot-linked shirt, I became the owner of an incredibly steep shirt.
Wearing this shirt under the school uniform, I brought the troop ("land admiral") and sounding up to the outbreak - they, splashing with saliva, spit "for this is the colour of the most likely enemy"!
But they could do nothing.

Although only a few years earlier, I think it could have been so easy to go a 101 km.

When you avoid taxes, somewhere a small child of a clerk who lacks cocaine is crying.
Cocaine is always lacking.

from JJ:

I have a acquaintance with Misha. At three-and-a-half years old, the boy already knew words such as “imbridging” and “brachiation” and could explain what they meant, while not pronouncing “r”... One day, I asked him “Misha, why don’t you make friends with Ilya?”
Misha replied, “He is not obscured, he does not argue with me!”"

Received from the head of the ears, he said, you can not call children by their names, it is unethical and unpedagogical. Well, what if there are seven boys in the group, and five of them are Daniels. Solved the problem: gave parents the task to come up with a loving nickname for the child, which can be used by the educator. Now I have in my group: Luchik, Masik, Frikadelka, Dalek and Aziraphel the Light, the Future Lord of Asgard.