bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 13 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №86727
 08.09.2013
Let me start with a small prehistory. I live in a remote house, where mostly prosecutors and the Ministry of Internal Affairs work, with a guarded parking lot, video cameras at every step and other delights. Once, with the help of a program for amateur video editing and his tablet filmed as a satellite falls on the parking lot and posted on YouTube. The next day, at the parking lot where the satellite fell, the cars were dispersed and the asphalt was taken, and the YouTube video was removed. You are talking about anonymity on the internet.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №86726
 08.09.2013
In the courtyard we have a lovely mansion with a table and a couple of benches. It is good to sit in it in the fresh air... probably... theoretically, because nothing good can be in our country and the bars are smeared with a solidol so that alcoholics and drug addicts do not sit on them. Here is just something these vigilant citizens have calculated: I don't know how alcoholics, and addicts sit on it quite successfully... and they even have fun sitting there.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №86725
 08.09.2013
A tired rider.
The Gypsy Camp
and constantly checks
Hands with a horse

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №86724
 08.09.2013
The meaning of the profession "economist" I understood being unemployed for more than a year.

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №86723
 08.09.2013
What I disbelieved today in this world...the only store where there was a lubricant for the cooler is a sex shop...Of course not quite for the cooler, but the fucking even in the car stores in the center there was no solidol(
But now the computer is quiet and smells like strawberries.

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №86722
 08.09.2013
“And now something folk,” Leps said and sang, “I’m going to live in London.”

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №86721
 08.09.2013
We were five in the area yesterday. Two guys look like factory.
Do you eat smoking?
Hold on!
and thanks.
Do you wear a beard? Being lazy or religious?
and lazy!
How are you at work?
Breathing is welcome if it grows. You can wear a sweater with elephants.
...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №86720
 08.09.2013
my neighbors below the second month from the balcony carpet hangs...Dry what?
No, they just have a place under the carpet in the apartment.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №86719
 08.09.2013
XX: You are so evil!
Why do everybody call me so?
XX: Well, at least remember how you bought a bicycle lock and attached it to someone else's bicycle.The owner went out and removed his castle, but was not ready for the fact that there would be another one. And when you went out and stumbled on it, saying it was your bicycle, we came to this conclusion))

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №86718
 08.09.2013
I lost my favorite hair rubber a week ago: I searched everything, and I found it today.

[ + 11 - ] Comment quote №86717
 08.09.2013
Since I was a child, I have been interested in the question: why do the Basics of Life Safety teach the military affairs?

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №86716
 08.09.2013
Interview on one of the Zello channels. Participants get to know each other.
Boy: I am Sergey, from Khabarovsk, 72 kilograms, 183 centimeters, 24...
The girl: Oh! Twenty and four centimeters!! This is yes!!...
Boy: 24 years...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №86715
 08.09.2013
Comments on Manga:

Yasha5588: How many dead animals can be dragged on>_<
Dying: Living animals are harder to drag - they brag.
XTihiroX: Death, you already know

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №86714
 08.09.2013
[xxx] Played a total thief new for Sparta
XXX was attacked. Force ratio of 1/3
[xxx] I placed a pair of squads of copers on all passages to the point of capture, and I ordered the shore armies to carry out the tactics of exhaustion.
A third of the enemy landed. killed all of them. The ratio was on my side.
[xxx] All the others are displaced. I am building a new line of defense. I close the holes. I wait. Archery enter the ranks of spy carriers and open fire - miraculously kill the commander.
[xxx] And here is the enemy’s first squad from the run-up hitting on my spies...
xxx and that is all. The game flew.
[xxx] This battle lasted for an hour. What a fucking shit. All my diamond fruits in military tactics and strategy have gone nowhere.
[xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[yyy] If your story were a movie, I would say it has a very sudden ending.)
[xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx You sit in the cinema and watch "300 Spartans". Before the battle, Leonid speaks of courage and courage. In the next scene, they run against each other. And here is the first Persian with screams and a spear in his hand jumps on Leonid and here on the screen a huge window of the screw, a characteristic sound and it is written - "The app finishes the work. Do you want to report the error to our experts?"
[yyy] =D

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №86713
 08.09.2013

00:56:27 xxx
And my girlfriend is giving birth to my doctor.)
00:56:35 yyy
Every year?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №86712
 08.09.2013
Review of Great Wall Hover on the well-known website:
Author: Mikhail Viktorovich
The real disadvantages:
A two-second turbocharging that you should always remember when starting
- about the passport expenditure of 10 liters - not even dreaming
The native curtains are too short - change them immediately for long curtains.
Marriage betrayal on the back sofa is extremely difficult.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №86711
 08.09.2013
The people suspected something when the wife of the president of the country bought a bag of salt and two boxes of lights in the store.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №86710
 08.09.2013
The old tomatoes.
A familiar historian, a collector of Siberian folklore.

It was long ago, before the king. There was a Lord of the Tomsk diocese to travel through the surrounding parishes with inspection. I decided to start with the poorest. I came, I watched - the churchwoman is old, the child is poor, but the matter is done, the services are going well. Poppy young shoutro runs, even on the table someone covered something, the stool put. Sitting to Dinner. He raises the toast:
Drink a drink, Lord! We drank and ate. He shakes again:
Let’s drink, Daddy, one by one! One more, and one more...
There was an inspection.
How long, how short, did the lord go to the richest parish. Look - the church is large, everything in gold, the parishioners are merchants and industrialists. Pop walks thick important, the beard shakes. Dinner is over, the table is broken. Sitting to Dinner. The toast raises:
Let us drink, Lord, at first! We drank and ate. He shakes again:
Let us drink, Lord, for the second time! Then the third, the fourth...
He returned from a trip, and a week later he issued an order: the poop from the poorest parish to be placed on the richest, and the poop from the rich, on the contrary.
The offended pop came to Tomsk, and to the lord:
Father, why did I get so ugly?? to
The Lord answered:
No matter, it will be useful to you. You will not be, a caregiver like that, drinks of other people to count.

[ + 110 - ] Comment quote №86709
 08.09.2013
When they say “10 years ago” I think of the 90s, not 2003.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №86708
 08.09.2013
xxx: I'm a loader, and I don't want to unload the fur before 11 p.m., I want to read at my Hobbit warehouse!!! to

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna