bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №77947
 26.02.2013
Project Manager: Nikita, you at least pretend to be working!
Nikita: If I could pretend to be working, I would have been the project manager for a long time.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №77946
 25.02.2013
Thin trolling by pharmaceutical companies.
I’m going to the subway today to meet the Negro. On the cheek patch "body color"

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №77945
 25.02.2013
Navi (09:21:10 25/02/2013)
of Dada. Take a normal IQ test.
PRAVO (10:30:42 25/02/2013)
* Reference to the classic Eisenhower*
Navi (15:09:00 25/02/2013)
I will not pass him. I don’t understand questions.
PRAVO (15:09:26 25/02/2013)
In fact, it’s also a passage...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №77944
 25.02.2013
Olgherd: You go like this, you look – "Oh! It is on W8!". Anne no, package from RIV GOSH.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №77943
 25.02.2013
XXX Do you want to go to the airport?
Do you really think I’ll be able to catch up in the air?
I will be the first person to come to the Jews.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №77942
 25.02.2013
I love February! Three days less pay.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №77941
 25.02.2013
From the protocol: "When the fire was extinguished, a body of 1976 birth was found"

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №77940
 25.02.2013
A new road from the street of Podolsk and Kharkov street to the MKAD will open in the south of Moscow in September this year.

The total length of the highway is 5.4 km. General designer – JSC "Mosinzhprojekt", general contractor – JSC "Dormost". The cost of construction is 3.6 billion rubles.

It turns out that a kilometer of road costs 666 666 666,666 rubles.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №77939
 25.02.2013
X: Mother on assignments, diplomas. Payment by fact

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №77938
 25.02.2013
The grandmother in the interview was given mother aid - dry milk, 4 small packages of kefir and a magazine of Forbes. You are mocking, dogs.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №77937
 25.02.2013
Moscow Mayor S. Sobyanin has allocated Depardieu an apartment where the actor could keep the keys from the apartments presented to him by the heads of the regions.c) The Twitter

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №77936
 25.02.2013
It is not the letter B, but the general alarm signal on the railway - long and three short... You can also signal with the letter C" - three short - the signal to the train to get back...

I wonder who of the authors of this council was driving in the locomotive cabin? Sound insulation, which allows you not to shake up from the noise of the engine, will easily protect the ears from the sluggish bips of the clutch, and at the distance where the driver will hear them, the driver in the car will only cross and have time.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №77935
 25.02.2013
So, the long-awaited Black Mesa (for those who are not aware: Half-Life remake) has been released.

You know, if 10 years ago I had been told, “Let’s go, guys, in 10 years you’ll be playing GTA 3 on your phone, I’d probably believe it.” I have always believed in technological progress. But if 10 years ago I had been told that I would have the first "half" on a modern computer to be unplayable...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №77934
 25.02.2013
I bought in the MTS cabin a USB switch to charge the phone via a USB cable.
I tried, learned to download files on the socket, it is true that it was uploaded on the socket, I could not view))
In general, after half an hour of downloading files on the connector I sat the phone, hot charging)) but not charging (

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №77933
 25.02.2013
I switched on Skype to talk to my mom. I turned on the camera, I sat down. My mother looks at me but is silent. Then so accurately: "Young man, and my daughter where?"
I am "Mom, what are you doing? That is me! You don’t see my sibling? What kind of person am I?"
Mom: "I see the chicks. But these guys are so strange"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №77932
 25.02.2013
XXX (14:47:47 25/02/2013)
I went on borders,
YYY (14:47:54 25/02/2013)
Y-Y and Y?
XXX (14:48:13 25/02/2013)
The border was scared, but the wheel bended.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №77931
 25.02.2013
xxx (short) in Finland there is a punk group consisting entirely of people with Down syndrome.
xxx: although we have such groups at all to the ass))
YYY: We have a whole government of such people.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №77930
 25.02.2013
With the advent of high-quality games on mobile devices, classic toilet dialogue
What are you doing there for so long?
In football, I play!
I have lost all my sarcastic colour (

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №77929
 25.02.2013
xxx: (((((( read here in the community "intercepted": "My neighbors from above are constantly fighting; and when they start to kick something heavy, maybe each other?, their child locks up in the toilet and begins to tell poems."
I can’t do that, I’m sorry :(

Yyy: Don’t worry, this neighbor below clearly misunderstood something. Why should you read poetry in such a situation? I don’t think it’s poetry, but magic. Of which, in fact, parents and sausages.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №77928
 25.02.2013
The morning. Trolleybus No. 3, on which, in addition to the tablet with the number 3, there is also a tablet with the number 13. Three young girls come in, one of them rushes to the conductor with a natural question: which route the trolley bus goes. The dialogue:
Is it the third or the thirteenth?
and yes.
What is "Yes"?
What you asked, the conductor coldly answers and turns away.

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