bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №67206
 18.07.2012
You don’t have to be a shit, even if you’re in the ass.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №67205
 18.07.2012
You need to sell this fucking printer.
Q: Have you already posted an advertisement?
He hanged on his refrigerator: If you want to eat, sell the printer!

[ + 55 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67204
 18.07.2012
In England it is safer to cross the road with a dog, in the United States with a child, in France with a beautiful woman. And in Russia, to grind, with basuka!

[ + 30 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67203
 18.07.2012
KJ: Is that what I should think? A colleague went for a week, shoot all the cigarettes, complained that there was no money to even eat to buy. She got an advance, and she went and bought a powder.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67202
 18.07.2012
In Serpukhov on one side of the road are located in a row and approximately three churches of the same size, and behind the corner a fourth. Why are they so many?
Tagged: RAID

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67201
 18.07.2012
XX: this writer =="
WOW: What else did she do?
Oh no, you’re doing Aikido, you know. The dick walked on a dark alley yesterday, she explained one reception to me. There are three men who come to us with obviously bad intentions. And what do you think? She didn't even wait until they dug up to us - not stopping to explain, gently took one by the hand, the one unconsciously knocked, and she like struck him on the floor, until the bones crushed. The other two killed me, and they hit me. Idiots... in general, I then called an ambulance – she accidentally put one of them with his head on the border. And now the menta do not believe that this little and thin thing has put three men, and they are trying to squeeze my bodily =="
Tagged with: xDDD cricket, guy

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №67200
 18.07.2012
I talk to the little three-born sister (C) about whether she slept out:
C: I am afraid of the dark.
I: What, are you afraid that the monsters will attack?
C: No, there are no monsters, you are what!
I: So why are you afraid then?
C is not.

I went to the kids :D

[ + 30 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67199
 18.07.2012
I sit in the office at the workplace without touching anyone and here from nowhere two flies appear and sit one on the right side of the table and the other on the left and slowly crush to me scratching their terrible legs and look at me with a smile. are surrounded. I thought something...

[ + 42 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67198
 18.07.2012
XXX is strange.
XXX is working. Heavy programs are loaded. are processed. A report is made on the laptop in the office. From the tablet, business correspondence is conducted and music is played. Contact and Twitter. In other words, a person does a few things, although close, but different.
xxx: perfectly remembers where he is and what
X: And my doctor, shit, does not remember!

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №67197
 18.07.2012
Can’t you come early?
xxx: not
YYY : Why?
You can’t just take it and come early.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №67196
 18.07.2012
Call her daughter Sparta. Everyone will come and ask "Who are we?and "
vobl: And you will take them into the corridor and cry quietly "This is SPARTAAA!!and "
What is quiet?
If you wake your daughter up, you will listen to Sparta until night.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №67195
 18.07.2012
Alex (12:34:49 17/07/2012)
Hi, request - need for crusher spare parts
The Basic Lion and Rights
They are adaptive!!! to

Anton(12:35:34 17/07/2012)
Hi to
What do you mean adaptive?

Alex (12:35:44 17/07/2012)
Repeated

Alex (12:35:49 17/07/2012)
The Porters

Alex (12:36:01 17/07/2012)
Fuck it 😉

Alex (12:36:07 17/07/2012)
Reversed

Alex (12:36:38 17/07/2012)
I think it’s good 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉 😉

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №67194
 18.07.2012
Pictures from the near future:
You were arrested for pedophilia.
But I just wanted to drop the report!
You all say that!
But I am only 15 years old!
You pedophiles don’t think that.
But I thought...
I didn’t have to think – I had to watch the first channel! for his castration.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №67193
 18.07.2012
With Laura:
111: Skype has confirmed the existence of the bug, due to which in some cases IM messages leave who hit.
222: Erunda, you can not even repair, but simply write in the license that delivery is guaranteed in 98,5% of cases.
333: or just replace the inscription on the button "send" to "I am lucky"

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №67192
 18.07.2012
Know how to value the past you have, in order to build the future you deserve.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №67191
 18.07.2012
The affairs of Dimian's parents went to the mountain, they gave their son to an elite school. But we have even the most super popper school under the EGE sharpened, and literature is still Soviet ferment. The children were asked a composition based on the very satirical poem of Nekrasov "To whom in Russia to live well".

Well, Dima wrote that in Russia only rich people live well, but this is not enough - you have to be very dishonest. He gave examples from his own school. One paragraph of his work was just a paragraph - to whom, how and how much the wealthiest parents stumble, so that their children have excellent scores. And as his own teachers are oppressed, because his parents refuse to battle for grades.

The teacher complained to the director. Idiot, the director was new and evil. He carefully studied this full paragraph and began to call the heroes of the composition one by one. Then he called Daddy. When he returned home, he silently grabbed his belt. The whole family stood up in defense of the damned Dima. My mother said firmly, “Yes! In Russia, the truth is punished. But at least, they are no longer dirty!”

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №67190
 18.07.2012
I used to live alone, and all my things were falling in place.
Now I have a girlfriend, and all my things are clean and beautifully lying unknown where...

[ + 36 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №67189
 18.07.2012
and honey. The forum.
xxx: Hi!I want to consult on this question: I and my young man are fascinated with bullshit - it's beating eggs, he likes to have him sprinkled with spinach, and very much! tell me what the consequences may be, the last time he had blood, but not very much!what is it?

YYY (of the Do you not plan to castrate?

XXX: Well, it’s too much...I’m interested – is it harmful?

YYY: I’ve already answered...

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №67188
 18.07.2012
I do not like surprises. You expect a surprise in the form of a trip to Disneyland for the weekend, and the surprise is the fact that your grandmother will come to visit in the evening and you need to clean up in the room.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №67187
 18.07.2012
I went here on a dating site to take care of my second half... Chat the idea of solitude strengthened...

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