bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №56984
 30.11.2011
He: Let us go.
She: Let me
He: So let’s go.
She: Let me
We are wasting.
She: Give me
He cannot communicate seriously with you.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №56983
 29.11.2011
Chat at work:
SPIDI (13:58:48 29/11/2011)
now I am sitting in the toilet, who is pulling the engagement and knocking I on the machine issued "go in" pen is pulling again is distributed mat then rust and who is running)))))
HEAD (13:59:38 29/11/2011)
I am sorry 😉


[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №56982
 29.11.2011
Yes, the men are not lucky (we have a better shoulder)
We are writing standing 😉
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Especially in the frost.
by mmmmmmmm
In a clean field 😉
It is comfortable))
xxx: but when I go to the toilet I sit on the toilet and do not stress)) or when drunk, for example) do not need to get into the toilet)))) sit and sit)
I can do that too 😉

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №56981
 29.11.2011
Yes is
Being a fool is good.
I laugh, others laugh.

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56980
 29.11.2011
When I start missing an ex-girlfriend, I go to the social media page. I network to the guy she has now, and I listen to the hectic rap he’s composing, and I’m getting better for some reason.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №56979
 29.11.2011
Would you give a man for a million dollars?
YYY: No for anything in the world!! If I could win a million...
XXX: in a point...

[ + 101 - ] Comment quote №56978
 29.11.2011
I sit, steal for teaching a new book from the party of the library, scan in djvu. The problem is how to remove the stamp of the library. Is it little. Three hours forged inets in search of the proge to edit djvu, all on the nerves, tomorrow agreed to settle for the bill.
Here comes the mommy, he says, white piece of paper, where the stamp is.
0 0 old school!! to

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №56977
 29.11.2011
Girls, if in the subway you are sitting and in front of you a charming young man and does not take your eyes away from you... Relax, just behind your back is a subway scheme ;)

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №56976
 29.11.2011
A friend’s story:
- I sit behind the comp, scratch the websites, scratch the music... I watch, spam: "The prediction of Vanga: Something terrible will happen in 16 days"...
Then there is a warning: "Attention! The licensed version of Kaspersky expires in 16 days.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №56975
 29.11.2011
My favourite mantra: "We need to be careful with synonyms. Compare, for example: "the old witch" and "the old witch". Apparently, in essence the same thing, and you come and tell some grandmother and you will feel the difference"))))

[ + 66 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56974
 29.11.2011
Foreign medicine has gone a long way ahead of our translators in the end of ophanareli... I read the instructions of a complex preparation with all kinds of calcium, magnesium and other substances needed in the body. Russian section of instructions: Strengthens bones, nervous system, etc. Contraindications: with excessive use of the drug can cause a temporary state of immortality.

The rabbit! No such side effects. He snorted the pill and went into battle until 30 seconds of immortality slept... The dream of the RPG-shniks, ept!

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56973
 29.11.2011
I just discovered in a practical way that large blankets have an undeniable advantage. You can go into the carpet and put a blanket in it.
WOW: although you can probably make a hole for the face and not use a blanket at all.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №56972
 29.11.2011
Do the task, write a message "why you conflict with others". I don't know how to write accurately that I am surrounded by idiots.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №56971
 29.11.2011
Now the boss (wife, two children) is telling. He had a dialogue with a friend.

She: "Do you know how to raise your mood? Throw on any SMS number: "I am pregnant". By the way, I dropped you. Why not answer? Where is your phone?"
Head of "House"

The boss cries, he says, I don't know what is waiting for me at home tonight, but the mood is really uplifting.

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56970
 29.11.2011
yai (15:22:14 28/11/2011)
I broke the brain of a kiwi.
When asked who would go to smoke with me, one programmer replied that he would go, but he would not smoke - just standing next to me.
I pulled him out of Kiwi’s pocket with the words:
Then hold my hairy potatoes!
he had such eyes)))))))))))) he so jumped away from me)
I cried from laughter)
Lilly (15:27:21 28/11/2011)
You can do it. :D

[ + 44 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56969
 29.11.2011
I wonder who our people are actually voting for.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №56968
 29.11.2011
So, we are sitting in mathematics. He is jumping at the board, painting something for us, telling something about the factorial, and we are sitting, leg for leg abandoned, painting. And then he says, "Do you have any questions?"" Well, one girl raises her hand and asks, "What are you putting here for crying signs everywhere?""
D: And what is it?
xxx: Says "It’s for you, girls, to read this formula with expression"

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №56967
 29.11.2011
If she’s angry and leaves... don’t follow her, she’s probably gone for a tail.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №56966
 29.11.2011
My son, we have a PC! The cat joked on the couch, on the carpet, and even in the kitchen joked!
“Fuh, and I thought the body of the prostitute under my bed began to smell...

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56965
 29.11.2011
A acquaintance doctor said:
The couriers of them are full fools, boys with nine unfinished classes. From the maternity home it was necessary to take a container with embryos (abortions were there, miscarriages) to the histology, it was in a completely different building.
So they took the container to the city.
That was a kickoff.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna