bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №54824
 12.10.2011
XXX is
Fucking cats under the horse.

XXX is
I opened the window rysya (my cat) on the window rack used the window

XXX is
The cat saw her and cuddled.

XXX is
jumped out of the first floor window.

XXX is
And on the brick wall he tries to get to us. on the second floor. The Romantic Hero X)

[ + 64 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №54823
 12.10.2011
The morning was an anecdotal.
SMS arrives at 4 a.m. I jump (the sound is good, so I hear the vibration), I go to read. "Good morning" wrote to me from an unknown number. Not very good, okay. Once he exploded, he went, poured water, drank, wrapped himself.
At five o’clock comes the second SMS, “Have I learned?” – I begin to doubt the reasonableness of the writer, because I’m a boy.
It’s 6 a.m. and how many watches do you have now, kiss? Why are you silent?" - I barely calm my nerves and swear to myself not to be nervous.
And in seven, as a culmination, the third "Excuse me, not you". And the fourth ":("
Your mother, a stranger, was lucky that I didn’t know him.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №54822
 12.10.2011
I sit and look at the matrix, so to speak to refresh the masterpiece, and here comes a letter, an invitation to an interview. I'm worried about the sender's signature, what do you think to go?)

"Stolbova Olesya Anatolievna
Department of Recruitment and Development
The Human Resources "

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №54821
 12.10.2011
xxx: Please tell a car within 450 tires, running on diesel or 92 gasoline
YYY: How many letters?

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №54820
 12.10.2011
My beloved stumbled from behind, raised on his arms and threw.
I was scared: You don’t love me!
He: It is not true! I caught it :)

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №54819
 12.10.2011
I come home one day from work, I approach my entrance, a woman opens the home phone in front of me, well, I go after her to the elevator. The elevator was on the 1st, it opens, it goes in, I follow and I say, “I have a fifth!” Then the woman turns around and with cries runs out of the elevator, pushing me and rattling, taking the heart: "Lord! How you frightened me!! I will go on another!"
Well, I smiled, pressed my floor and went...
She would know that after her whizes I barely put on the pants.)

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №54818
 12.10.2011
X: Isn’t it you in the game yesterday with Nick Aleksandra?
Alexzandra: Cheap Chinese counterfeit.

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №54817
 12.10.2011
AAA: Who thinks about online discount coupons projects? Who used and what?

BBB: in the aquagallery with a child went for 180 rubles instead of 600

CCC: Used several times, every time - either the car is dumb washed, learning that they are washed on the stock for a quarter of the price, or they are dumb cut, or you can wait an hour after the recording - because 5 minutes before your recording came a customer who does not pay the full price, or the delivery of any food with a huge delay.
A lot of practice is simply absent in the auto school coupon - but the coupon does not say this, for example. Crossing and falling together.

BBB
I do not know...
In the aquagallery, all the fish swam qualitatively, the morena came out of the pot in time, the shrimp did not hamle.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №54816
 12.10.2011
Sorry, I am just nervous.
She is nervous*
On the first, in more detail.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №54815
 12.10.2011
XXX: You graduate from university, who do you see yourself at work in what position?
YYY: I would like to do such a unique job as to have one boss and no subordinates.
Mary, the housewife is not a profession.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №54814
 12.10.2011
News on Mail:

"Russia destroyed Andorra and broke the Euro".

Well, logically, once in football such problems, why not destroy a small harmless country whose team prevents the Euro.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №54813
 12.10.2011
Gopster: What are you doing?
moiseeva: I drop debian on the notebook and put FreeDos there
moiseeva: tomorrow will come from the dating service, asked him to help set up the internet on the notebook ^_^
Do you start a relationship with lies? :D

[ + 61 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №54812
 12.10.2011
ximik (12:21:36 12/10/2011)
My wife came from the medical examination.
ximik (12:21:40 12/10/2011)
Writing
ximik (12:21:41 12/10/2011)
Lilit (12:10:02 12/10/2011)
Gynecologist Writes Congratulations
Lilit (12:10:06 12/10/2011)
Fuck what?? to

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №54811
 12.10.2011
Kyu (22:45:01 11/10/2011)
You are a little trick!

Kyu (22:45:05 11/10/2011)
Oh is

Kyu (22:45:05 11/10/2011)
not you

Kyu (22:45:16 11/10/2011)
You are a sociopathic ass

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №54810
 12.10.2011
I guessed on-line on the book of fate. I asked a question in the work section. The answer was this:

Find and embrace the cat. Cats bring joy.

[ + 54 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №54809
 12.10.2011
When I was a child, my grandmother struck me a fist in the face when I tried to take cream without asking. Since then, I have learned that stealing is not good.

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №54808
 12.10.2011
Cake (19:17:37 08/10/2011)
Already on the network? How did the operation go, baby? of live?

NFox (19:18:36 08/10/2011)
I leave morally. I will never go under a knife to a known surgeon again.

Cake (19:20:02 08/10/2011)
And what? Uncle Jura raised you, he loves her, right?

NFox (19:22:17 08/10/2011)
and ah. He loves. This did not prevent him from hanging a mirror over the operating table. And in the process it is joyful to shout: you see, this is superfluous, we will cut it off.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №54807
 12.10.2011
Terminator
We got two pictures, two pictures.
Terminator
Walking
Terminator
My birthday was on my finger.
Terminator
Because it is in every picture.
Terminator
Some are alone)

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №54806
 12.10.2011
Pepe and Nick :D
A polite sniper, Pandora
Hm yeah yeah. That is what I say.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №54805
 12.10.2011
Milla, boldly crumbling them in an awhile dress-cake, Bloom, jumping next to the sword on the overweight, the "Zenit" shirt and the screams of "CANAL!!!!111" and me-eatenly flying into the smoke of something fun Jack-all-that-your-mother-Haircraft. Have I forgotten anything?

Does life teach you nothing?
Captain Jack the Sparrow. by Pi-Tan

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna