bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 69 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51264
 04.08.2011
of the best:
Never pour cognac into an ultrasonic humidifier!! to

In such cases, the reason must be indicated. Almost everyone is going to check out. And the rest will run to buy this humidifier and then check it out!

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №51263
 04.08.2011
Everything that is not mine
Everything I can take away is untouched.

Some kind of smart. The school hanged on the wall.

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №51262
 04.08.2011
I used to go to the herd, cut out a couple of goats.
Meat for a week for the whole family.
Resident of Ravnin: I see, to the harsh mountain - harsh prints...

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №51261
 04.08.2011
Pictures of a small wooden house.
I would like to live in a small cottage away from people.
YYY: And around the silence and tranquility there are no machines, forever snoring "by the affairs" of passers... You live in harmony with yourself and the world around you... Great!
XXX is....
Zzzz: guys, this is a sarai

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №51260
 04.08.2011
The day of VDV. I watched Epic. Two busty landers before a guy decided to fuck up. I would help, but I didn’t have time to get dumb...they were really good guys – in front of the UFSB they started to get rid of the guy :-) 3 people in black at once are wider than these desanters. I think they immediately trembled from the sweet voice of these cute people :-)

[ + 69 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51259
 04.08.2011
Five-year-old Wachtang demands that the windows in the classroom be shaded, and that is "how lohi we sit".

[ + 115 - ] Comment quote №51258
 04.08.2011
I went with my friends to the Kuban festival. Who doesn’t know: the festival takes place on the Black Sea coast 60km from Anapa. They found a phone on the beach and as decent citizens decided to return it to the owner. I found the number "mama" in the notebook and called. and further dialogue.
“Hi, I found the phone, apparently it’s your son or daughter.
Yes, this is my son’s phone, where are you?
- Emm, well... on the beach, at the rock festival near Anapa.
My son in Anapa?!? to

[ + 72 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51257
 04.08.2011
A dialogue with a sister whose school was told about Achilles.

Anya: Mom, and we were told today at school that Achilles had a weak spot – his heel.

Yes my daughter.

Anya: And I looked at Troy and thought, Achilles was not beaten by the fact that his arrow was thrown into his heel, but what after that was another arrow 5 in his chest?

I fell...

[ + 49 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51256
 04.08.2011
Levfox: I stood and listened to music in my headphones in the rain. Playing with Bathoven. A stranger approached me and said I was strange. I said I listen to music. He asked me if I had gone away, showing me a cork. I gave him a headphone with music. He was listening! He looked at me and apologized.

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №51255
 04.08.2011
News on the Internet:
Minsk: in the courtyard burned rubbish ― damaged two Volkswagen

The first comment:
Did the rubbish survive?

[ + 61 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51254
 04.08.2011
Comment (as is) to an interview with the recently deceased scientist Sergei Kapica:
Sergey Petrovich, my opinion, that solar cells need to be removed, they attract more solar energy to the earth, hence this abnormal heat of 2010, we will destroy the Earth, there will be a worldwide flood You are a scientist and must understand this, all elementary and simple.
Congratulations to Marina"

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №51253
 04.08.2011
I read English every day!
Why do you read such English?
New Game, Load Game, Save Game

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №51252
 04.08.2011
Being perfect doesn’t mean being thrown in the eye. To be perfect is to crash into memory.c) Giorgio Armani

To be perfect is to be perfect (c) Captain Evidence

WOW: And who is that?

You won’t believe... Captain Evidence is Captain Evidence!

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №51251
 04.08.2011
I read the news "In Minsk special forces and the militia were finding out who was better".
With 80.3 percent of the votes, Lukashenko won.

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №51250
 04.08.2011
To the tariffs for travel in paycart and common wagons of trains, in effect in Russia from January 1, 2011, is planned to apply a coefficient of 2,995. This will lead to a rise in the price of passenger cars and common railways up to 300%.

Comments Off on The Migration Issue Is Solved! Only the healthiest and healthiest will get to Moscow on foot!

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №51249
 04.08.2011
We were sitting at the party, we talked about what color the begemot is.
He is grey.
2: the brown
3: blue, but it is only in the cartoons!
What a mysterious animal.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №51248
 04.08.2011
Of what they have, people are most willing to share their problems.

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51247
 04.08.2011
In our school, a young teacher, herself recently sitting behind the board, was entrusted to somehow conduct a lesson of drawing – in addition to her natural sciences and biology. Already at the first lesson, she realized that the mosquitoes would die from the etudes with scattered gips pears. She decided to revive the lesson and offered those who wanted instead of pear to come up with her unknown beast and paint it in three projections, along with the skeleton and internal organs. We all wanted to be one. But it turned out to be difficult – all three projections at first violently contradicted each other. We brought out a bunch of washing gums and at the end of the lesson presented our creatures thoroughly, in volume - my example then dreamed of me and ran a long track, slightly shrinking.

The teacher easily gave us five for drawing, but she took the entire statue of drawings with her for the next lesson, biology. Or natural science, I don’t remember. Then the defeat began. For each of our monsters in turn, she explained at what minute or so and from what specifically it would throw away the monster - whom the heart caught, who was suffocated, somebody's bones broken at the very first step. For the few survivors of our crazy zoo, she has picked up suitable habitats for them - who is the mud, who is the pampas. They all died of starvation or were consumed. But their lives were not in vain - the most surviving got five. No, this fun lesson was full, and Minober would hardly approve of it. But until now, from the whole school program, I remember him with warmth. I looked at the many strange creatures I met later in life with admiration, trying to guess what the perfection of the design is, and why it is actually still alive running on the light. I even stopped dropping on ants from a burning plastic bottle – what’s called, you can’t build, don’t break.

The school was not late, and I will not even remember her name, unfortunately.
It was just her student practice. But I remember the most amazing of the creatures we created in that lesson – it was invented by the Girl of Light. She often saw her grandmother's inserted jaw in a glass of water and easily threw it in three projections, and made some kind of mole from behind, so as not to pair with the skeleton. This monster brought her a five in drawing and a three in biology, dying on the way to food. The next day, the teacher came excited with some thick-walled booklet and showed there a photo of one of the dolomite Alpine reptiles - this whole reptile was made from the jaw of an extinct mole, ammonite seems to be without any signs of a skeleton. The light of the three was immediately corrected to five with a plus – because these inserted jaws with a tail proved to be the only viable creature we created. It has lived and lived successfully for millions of years, and apparently even ate something. To comfort the teacher of the Light, she said, “Don’t be upset, you guessed correctly that you would still die.”

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №51246
 04.08.2011
The Armenian Radio:
How can the Russian government stop corruption?
With the help of Suicide.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №51245
 04.08.2011
From the news:
Rospotrebnadzor banned “smetanka” and “пломбирчик”
One of the comments: Milk is fresh, sterilized, pasteurized and condensed.
A cow has four breasts.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna