bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №35358
 01.09.2010
I finally bought a cigarette with threatening inscriptions.
Agk: I can see that it has the reverse effect.
Agk: bought 4 packs, all 4 inscriptions different
Agk: I want to buy more, know what else will be written

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №35357
 01.09.2010
I laugh at myself)

He studied for himself in the universe, walked: retired, then recovered. studied well... Oh well!! Agenda for the Army.
I went to the military. They say "Oh, you will go to the VVD! In 2 weeks, go to the army" Departure...BAH! They say we will take it in the spring...
The Spring. Blue hair is foolish. Forbidden: "Your psychological type does not fit in any kind of Russian troops"
Autumn...this is my 3rd time on the 2nd course or take the job of a soft toy seller?

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №35356
 01.09.2010
M: "Oh, gravity, you are heartless shit!" (c)
Yes, I think it every time I look at my chest.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №35355
 01.09.2010
News on ferre.ru
Ukrainian Foreign Ministry wants to ban "VKontakte"
Commentary :
If the title reduces the double point, the intrigue will be more

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №35354
 01.09.2010
My blonde colleague is sitting behind the comp and after a minute of scrolling the mouse wheel gives out: 'eh, what a big exel...'

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №35353
 01.09.2010
Minya always liked the phrase "VAZ engineers developed..." immediately the weight of the concept "Engineer" falls into the area of the plinth. We need to say "The craftsmen of the VAZ have invented..." or there "The men of the VAZ have invented..."

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №35352
 01.09.2010
by KoS [11:08]
We had a guy on Friday to work from the badun came and knocked on the computer)))
by KoS [11:08]
Now he has a new computer.

[ + 64 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №35351
 01.09.2010
I gave my sister a lie detector on the DR, which strikes (well, in general, she loves to torture people). He handed the gift, then immediately sat down on the chair, folded the detector, sharply attached to the table, fixed her hand, turned it on, played music like "who wants to be a millionaire", and asked if she liked the gift. It turned out to like.
Satisfied ^_^

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №35350
 01.09.2010
[9:51:09] MJSN1k: So you have a new number?)
[9:51:30] MJkos: no shit, old only with other numbers)))

[ + 75 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №35349
 01.09.2010
The year 2012. The December.
It was half dark. A small rain
He knocked on the roofs and on the roofs of houses. The light approached me closely and said, “I am cold.” I felt her warm breath and said, “Warm your hands in my pockets.” She put her hand in the right pocket of my pants. Since the pockets were broken, and there were no cowards on me, she touched and began to feel something very hot. Then she looked at me and asked:
What is it?
I had nothing to answer:
This is the end, light.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №35348
 01.09.2010
Rour: Oh, I have a stall flowing.
Mod: o_o
You need a girl.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №35347
 01.09.2010
Oh well healthy. How to do?
On a vacation :)
So why in the city? What about the sea, girls?
and ha. The bathroom, the bathroom, the house :) Rest in Russian.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №35346
 01.09.2010
rastamanchik: and in general, who covers the matyucs with all sorts of stars, will be in paradise boy looking with black squares!

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №35345
 01.09.2010
He is: Well please?
She: What will happen to me?
Noah, I’ll show you something.
How was it yesterday? The fifth?

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №35344
 01.09.2010
and Lena:
Let’s be friends?

by Alexander:
Sorry, but how to make friends with a person who has a head on the avatar to the semi-nude figure terribly crisp (likely in paint), turned into the camera in an unnatural posture, disproportionately large relative to the body and not throwing shadows?
Thank you, but a vampire-hydrocephalus with a curved neck is not my companion.

and Lena:
Go you go! This is not my head!

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №35343
 01.09.2010
A friend writes: her husband is driving, he sees mint mashed with his hand straight, brakes... takes documents, comes out of the car, approaches mint. That "What do you need?"... well you’re going to stop...."I’ve driven the fly away";

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №35342
 31.08.2010
Why the fucking, why? I am sick at home, in my room, I watch Naked Breakfast on Berrouse’s motifs... Mom goes in, the fox, the only time, at the moment of the only bed scene. What a homophobic scene!! The temperature goes up and off.
Emily, what are you looking at?
The movie is Mom!! >_<
Mom: about what? O_O
About the Writer, Mom!!! to

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №35341
 31.08.2010
Yesterday I told my younger brother a story. He sits and looks at the TV: "How did I get this ad!". I: "But when I was a kid there was no advertising at all". I felt like a dinosaur.)

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №35340
 31.08.2010
He is:
What can you see through the mouthpiece?

She is:
by happy coincidence

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №35339
 31.08.2010
It’s time for vacation...

I work as a publishing editor in inform. The agency. The phone calls:

I am allo.
Interview with Hello. You are worried about state control. Have you received a package of oil?
I honestly admitted and honestly admitted that I didn’t get anything like that.
Interlocutor – Strange... (and after a minute of silence adds) Now we’ll send it again.
I am – and why?
Interview – Why? (and proudly says so) We send them all!

Putting the phone I shocked to smoke, and when I returned to the computer, I saw a new letter in the postcard:
Authority: State Control
Subject: Press Release "Contact with the Oil "..

Time for vacation...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna