bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №26368
 22.02.2010
Can’t you find "Bentley"? Stop in the tram!

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №26367
 22.02.2010
at my friend's cat in the 12th year of his castrated life twisted the intrigue with a tap! gives the cat in good hands!)))

[ + 74 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26366
 22.02.2010
I’m studying for a programmer; I have the rights of AB categories, I’m looking forward to the motorcycle season to conquer new distances on my Ural with a wheelchair; I love sex; I dress simple but comfortable... But I’m a girl and I dream of finding a guy! I feel like I’ve been fooled somewhere.

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №26365
 22.02.2010
The Minister of Sport is wise. What about the Olympics?

[ + 65 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26364
 22.02.2010
The status:
" Oh my girl! Leave the phone! What? No handcuffs? Show it on your fingers! I write... One, One, One... One... Oh, it’s not one! What an uncultured girl..."

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №26363
 22.02.2010
noamericans (15:58:35 21/02/2010)
I slept shorter 3 hours, I get up topaja to the kitchen, momma what a snack did) well I sit shorter (I wake up completely minutes after 10 as I got up) well I sit shorter I sit on the machine chew, here I stop chewing, I close my eyes and kaiaak gave the grain in the snack)))

noamericans (15:58:40 21/02/2010)
It is crazy ?

noamericans (15:59:01 21/02/2010)
As soon as I got to sleep and take a picture ?

[ + 53 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26362
 22.02.2010
My friends moved to live in the United States. Their son was about to marry an American woman. American parents come home to them, the whole family gathered, even the grandmother of this boy came from Russia for such an occasion. He hardly speaks English. She asked her granddaughter what her mother’s name was. He says Jen. It’s a difficult name, I don’t remember! The good grandson tried to help – “Well, grandmother, there’s a word for Jim, and she’s for Jen. It will be easier for you to remember!" and now is the hour x. comes this American mother of the bride, and the grandmother with Russian pleasure says to her - hello Mrs. Ketchup!!! Everybody was lying. Even the mother of the bride. =) is

[ + 95 - ] Comment quote №26361
 22.02.2010
When I said so
"People, Misha is sick. Bring something"
Dacia walked with a photic.

[ + 85 - ] Comment quote №26360
 22.02.2010
I am an administrator of a flash contact game. Recently came a message:
"Listen to be a friend. Give me a week, plz. I have a session ( ("
The cry of the soul.

[ + 70 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26359
 22.02.2010
Mistake (01:13 PM) :
My father told me that it was real to cook eggs in the microwave without water. I put 5 pieces on a plate for 2 minutes. The electricity to smoke went away, there, fucking, the direct fight began. At the last explosion, the door opened, and when the last egg broke, the whole hole flew to the wall of the refrigerator, and all my magnets fell. He rattled like a salmon, up to tears.
Issue (01:14 PM) :
How did I know I could put eggs in the microwave in the shell?
Issue (01:14 PM) :
Or am I just stupid?
Necroscope (01:15 PM) :
No, brother you are smart!
It is trustworthy!

[ + 87 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26358
 22.02.2010
Gifts for February 23. I did not know what to give my husband an expensive lighter or a knife there is good..I decided not to suffer and go to choose a gift with him, especially since he is not the biggest fan of surprises. And what do you think he chose from all the variety of possible gifts? The Multimeter!! Maybe I’m stupid, but I’t ever buy it as a gift! The second hour is already satisfied sitting in it. I tried everything I could :(

[ + 147 - ] Comment quote №26357
 22.02.2010
I adore this country. I came for lunch, got out of the balcony a pot with a borsch...picked a borsch...heated...beauty!

[ + 131 - ] Comment quote №26356
 22.02.2010
Not funny, but...
Participated in the Competition Teacher of the Year. The whole team helped, the programmer sat with me for two weeks, helped. The only of them all competitors passed the tests without any special remarks, on the "ura" passed an open lesson, all with the application of information technology. Even a video with participants "on memory" made. If not the first, then the second place.
I did not occupy anyone. It won such an UG that it became clear that everything was bought. After that, I wanted to quit the system. The students answered. Thank you guys for being there. And our programmer Vadim is a low gift. bring it.

[ + 109 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26355
 22.02.2010
A student told me today.
I went to Moscow this summer, and so in the subway I did not know where to sit, well, he thinks let me ask the locals, the girl fits, asks the guy - sorry please, we are not local people do not tell? And she in response.
- go to yuhh; he thinks okay, comes to the guy says,
- Brother you can't tell how; he is 100 rubles! The pirate, all fucking, he thinks, approaches the mint, asks how to get there (and a fellow Armenian) he immediately - your documents; in general, himself had to understand.
So, why are you crazy in Moscow?? to

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №26354
 22.02.2010
It is better to suffer for the homeland abroad than to suffer for it at home.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №26353
 22.02.2010
Beard on a blanket or underneath?

Listed in Diaries:

“The best way to spend a sleepless night is to cover yourself with a square blanket.
Because of the cold, he got a large cotton. He cursed everything in the world: which side he did not put, his feet are still pulled out. Even swallowed him. So short, and so on. He swallowed, took the old.
“The straight.” He immediately fell asleep.
In the morning, for interest, I laid them on the floor for measurement. Both in length – centimeter by centimeter.”

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №26352
 22.02.2010
After a week of the Olympics in Vancouver is no longer surprising backwardness
Russia with medals from the United States, Germany, France and even Canada. These are large countries with a large population. But the fact that Norway has collected twice as many medals as Russia is stupid. Because the entire population of Norway is smaller than the number of employees of Roskomsport.

[ + 94 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26351
 22.02.2010
And there are those who remember the cartoon of the mid-1990s "Rocker Mice from Mars"?

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №26350
 22.02.2010
I: Artem, are you extrapolating?
Friend: at night...

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №26349
 22.02.2010
I have dreamed of you today.
YYY: In what ample?
xxx: I love you emm... like I would... love you in general)
I loved in bed.
YYY: Did you fuck anything?
XXX is fucking

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna