bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 91 - ] Comment quote №23388
 07.12.2009
One day my wife and I were invited to a wedding.
And here, she shows me a girl with a 5 bust size and a big decoult, look, say, what. I say "Yes, good." All, you didn’t talk to me all night, like go to that cow, once you liked it.
The next evening, we seemed to be reconciled, we went to bed and I, the fool, laughed, "Those yesterday five were very big, and today three, but small."
I didn’t give it a week. :)

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №23387
 07.12.2009
KHH: Of course, some people can’t buy.

For everyone else, there is a MasterCard.

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №23386
 07.12.2009
Putin is always out of sight.
I watched the live broadcast. A woman is calling. Grit said I have diabetes, and there are no free medicines in the pharmacy. What to do?
Putin was not confused and issued: "A few years ago, there were no free medicines at all. Now we have multiplied! This is..."
It is only me taught in school that if zero is multiplied by any number it will be zero?!? to
Indeed, it is a burnt-out and a people...

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №23385
 07.12.2009
Tagged with FAR'a:

User: If you copy files from the left panel to the right, the progress bar grows (filled) from left to right. Is it possible to make the option that when copying / moving from the right to the left panel the progress bar grows from right to left?

Admin: It is not funny.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №23384
 07.12.2009
We are not afraid of the swine flu!!Because we are blue ?

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №23383
 07.12.2009
The Medical Forum:

Question: What happens if I lose my virginity with a vibrator?

The doctor’s answer: There will be no virgin straw.

Now we know about the profession of K.O.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №23382
 07.12.2009
Verified by personal experience.
If you want to invite a girl to watch a movie, NOT in order to watch a movie, then know that Twilight is absolutely not suitable for this :(

[ + 83 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23381
 07.12.2009
Mother learnt to read the history of messages in aske... Bliaaaaaaaaa! She would have better found the porn folder. [...]

by V2208

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №23380
 06.12.2009
I have a super seat! She’s asleep, next to her bed there’s a boxer, on the boxer there’s candy in an open bag (sister bought it), my phone charger and other stuff. And here I climb for the charging and accidentally plunge a candy ball right on it. She wakes up and looks at me in confusion.I expected to hear anything in the style of what I am a bad fool, etc.As anyone else would say in her place, but she said take a candy if you want!!! Continue to sleep.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №23379
 06.12.2009
I recently entered the office, and there a colleague calls someone on the phone and calls just when I went in. I hear the following words from my colleague:
Q: Hello, is this the Mendeleev table?
There is something responding.
Q: I would like allyic acid.
Answer something again.
Q: Okay, I’m waiting, connect...

It turned out that he called the chemistry store “Mendeleev’s Table” and then waited for him to be switched to another manager.

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №23378
 06.12.2009
Seven feet in the forehead, cutting the seed in the shoulders, the eye is a diamond... in short, the one is still a wicked one.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №23377
 06.12.2009
xxx: my computer writes "one of the usb devices is not recognized" I think that for henna, I have nothing but the mouse connected. Then it turned out that the cat laughed at the end of the yousbishnik rolling behind the table and it locked it.

yyy: fucking not recognized XDDDDD

I now seem to know why my previous mouse was not recognized.

[ + 77 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23376
 06.12.2009
An old acquaintance told my friend:

I came to Cyprus 5 years ago, soon bought a car, and the girl has no rights. Well, nothing, the first two years did not stop her at all. Then it happened... The Cypriot policeman asked her to show her rights. She is immediately nervous, neither alive nor dead, she thinks - well, she got. With shaking hands, he opens his wallet and touches his Latvian student ticket. And he is beautiful, in the form of a plastic card, with a hologram, a photo, the icon of the European Union... But all in the Latvian language.) He looked and looked, twisted, stretched back, and said - thank you, happy way )) So she still rides on the student instead of the right ))

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №23375
 06.12.2009
I go on the street in the inst, meet mom (m) with the child (r) (years 6 probably)
From a distance they hear their controversy.
Wear a shirt!
R: I do not want.
M: Dress up, or it will be worse!
I pass by and I hear the indignation in the child’s voice:
R: Here is my aunt (shows me) without a shirt
Don’t look at your aunt! At this pace, she will not live for long.
I’m so quiet, and I’m even slowing down to listen.
M: Here she will get sick and die!
I’ve never been so excited since morning!

[ + 53 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23374
 06.12.2009
Never jump from 7 heights or higher.

We are cleaning away from the idiots.)

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №23373
 06.12.2009
ellustrator: I'm trying to read "Sockel and Snoop" Acuina. It appears that the writer was bitten by Donzov.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №23372
 06.12.2009
xxx: I have gone
YYY: for now
XXX: So far
I go to you, fuck you are like that.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №23371
 06.12.2009
From Forum
Hello, Dear Visitors of the Forum!
I have such a problem.
Half a year ago, such a virus got caught somewhere: when the computer is turned on, it regularly in about 1 hour makes a sound similar to knocking on the door. The rest of the time he does not give up.
Kaspersky does not see it, the reinstallation of the screw does not give anything.
Per there is a program that will analyze all the software that runs on the comp and will be recorded... In general, at the next manifestation, so that you can see what was loaded.
There may be other ways to solve my problem, I am happy to listen to the recommendations of specialists.

Cheatministrator: Isn’t that from the ass, by chance, the sound?

Tatra: You are absolutely right.
and 5 points.
thank you.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №23370
 06.12.2009
Q: How did you wash your shoes?
Yyy: In absolute secrecy, so that my mom doesn’t see.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №23369
 06.12.2009
Many recruiters are confident that if you touch a weapon with your foot, it will appear in your hands with a click.

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