bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №19828
 31.08.2009
What Is Win7 Better?
WOW: It doesn’t brake, it doesn’t hang, it’s fast, comfortable...
Is it two?

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №19827
 31.08.2009
Official Russian Serve of Wolves:
Are there Russians here?
WOW: No
zzz :))))
Let me know where the Russians are.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №19826
 31.08.2009
The Prehistory:
The late evening. We lie in bed with my wife in a hug (he stands, but I am already asleep). I hear some movements start.
I: What are you doing there??? O_O
Sex and what? ?
I: Do you let me know?? to
And suddenly you will refuse.
I - O_O

Then there was a stormy sex)))

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №19825
 31.08.2009
At four o’clock in the night, I watch on television some cashmarking about a spacecraft. As the team died, rescuers stuck on the ship and as it goes: visions, corpses, dismemberment. And every 15-20 minutes let ads, and necessarily among the videos advertising kid school, where a girl sits and sings to the toys: "Mommy, the first word, the main word...."
Then again 20 minutes of bleeding and disarticulation, and the girl says again: “Mom... "Jut.
There were moments when I started to think it wasn’t a advertisement, it was part of a movie, to enhance the psychological effect.

[ + 97 - ] Comment quote №19824
 31.08.2009
Do you also feel invulnerable when at night, in the dark, you quickly get under a blanket and stretch up to your head? ^ ^ ^

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №19823
 31.08.2009
I am married to Winnie Pooh.
2nd O_O?? to
I come home, my wife is sitting. Eat honey spice, turning it into honey, and drinking tea with honey.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №19822
 31.08.2009
I am on a business trip.In Uzbekistan.I am in the airline in a row.Summer..Warm.After me, 2 guys with long hair are in the row, all in black - out of the player is loud music, on the jeans chains.I accidentally look at their legs - both dressed in shorts with clamps attached to them for stiffness. The metals)

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №19821
 31.08.2009
The Zoozooz:
Crisis, I open up the dungeon, denge in place and with them a note from my younger brother: "The sense of conscience, or rather fear, overcame greed in me."

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №19820
 31.08.2009
List of groups of girls VKontakte

♥♥Female logic, sγk@, phenomenon...♥♥ ▪ XENIA DOG MUST DIE!!!! ▪ ★ Ksenia ★ Forever ★

A shit, a phenomenon.

Old Fox

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №19819
 31.08.2009
Greetings to all! I want to know your opinions. What to do and / or how to make a guy can not breathe without a girl?

In order for a guy not to breathe without a girl, I can offer this option.
In one of the exits, visit the nearest terrarium with a guy. There to show ingenuity and provoke the situation that some cobra (in fact cobra) bit a guy. Under the action of poison, the guy will develop paralysis and start to stop breathing. Then you need to quickly move it to a pre-prepared room with an artificial breathing apparatus equipped with a power system from the foot drive. The guy is connected to the device, and the girl is put on the pedals of the dynamomachine to produce the necessary electricity. Without a girl, the guy can’t breathe.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №19818
 31.08.2009
3G on the forum.

3G is the third generation. Its main advantages are video telephony and high-speed mobile internet.

For example, video is not useful. I am still burning by my mother's voice when I'm busty, and now even the picture will be seen

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №19817
 31.08.2009
What happens if an unbreakable wall is struck by a >all-destroying ball?

The vision becomes dim, the world becomes blue and an inscription arises.

Fatal error
A problem has been detected and windows has been shut down to prevent damage to you.

[ + 65 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №19816
 31.08.2009
Answer to:
xxh: at night from the shift went, in a civilian, but with a tabular trunk. I met three idiots, they asked me to smoke, and I didn’t smoke. They asked me about my boldness. Two were shot in the leg, the third escaped. Will they go to the police to complain?
____
I wonder where this happens?
These insects will come to the hospital with bullets in their legs - and the mints will 100% start looking for a night sniper.
And reporting for two missing ammunition in a tabular weapon, what will you do?
And then, the shootings at night probably woke up all the old ladies around. 20 fingers at the same time.
It is strange that there was no sniper.

Even in Chechnya we don’t do that.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №19815
 31.08.2009
Phoenix
What are you going to do tonight?? to

Soontir
In general, I was going to buy a bottle of hennessy and go to the pissed girl and fuck up.

Soontir
and tk. I don’t have any money on hennessy and I don’t have a dirty girl – I’ll probably drink a beer on the bench))

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №19814
 31.08.2009
The ECB News...

29 August 2009 11:03
The director of the Yekaterinburg circus will select personnel for the police
Without his recommendations, the applicants will not be able to serve in the IMD.

No comments... I love this place.)

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №19813
 31.08.2009
Friendship is when you are late for half an hour, knowing that no one will hurt you, and you see that no one is still there.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №19812
 31.08.2009
This story was received by e-mail from a friend who himself dug it somewhere.

One of our brave police officers was given a vacation. Members of the “mines” according to the rule, stated:
“Take a vacation wash.” The vacationer and five colleagues, seized everything necessary, went to the garage of the culprit of the celebration. They came, drove the car out on the street, laid a newspaper on the workstation, said the first toast for the holiday!
A neighbor comes to the garage and asks the vacant man to help him deal with the car. The neighbor and neighbor are leaving. The time passed, five menta colleagues, after drinking a few toasts without the owner, began to rebel: "He went - and disappeared!"
They decided to joke with him. They removed everything from the workshop, as if nothing had happened, took the bottles, snacks, went down to the basement, closed the iron lounge and continued to celebrate holidays. At this time the owner returned, saw that no one was there, and decided, "Don't wait, fools! have gone!” He drove the car into the garage, crashed the wheel into the cellar, closed the garage to all the castles and went home. The next day I went on vacation with my family, somewhere in the
In the village for 24 days! When they returned, the first thing the spouse sent her husband to the garage, in the cellar for the products that were stored there.
Now strain your imagination, and try to imagine the stress he experienced when he opened the lounge and saw there black bearded rings! And the smell! Fortunately, all my colleagues survived.
And what was the noise in the Office about the disappearance of five operatives, it deserves a separate story! And that is not all!
Imagine their faces when, after everything became clear, the boss's order came out:
"All days spent in the basement - to consider the participants of events a holiday!"

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №19811
 31.08.2009
Congratulations to! You got into the GAI program, and we immediately start with the question of 500 rubles, why are the straps not attached?

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №19810
 31.08.2009
Kuzya: It should be nice to watch a movie with a beer and a beloved wife...
I’m not your wife yet.)
You do your duties =)
I don’t wash your socks!
I can wash them myself.
I am not cooking!
I can do it myself...
I don’t clean the house!
I can do it myself...
Liz: Fuck, how I’m glad I’m having sex with you, not you.

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №19809
 31.08.2009
Polcanium (15:25) :
I still have no food... again. It is :'(

asya (15:25) :
Where is she going? (where is she going? Do you eat it? 0 0 0

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna