Polish fishermen caught in the river Oder a giant soma of more than 3 meters and 20 kg, in the belly of which were found fragments of human bones and the metal distinctive mark of the SS of the Second World War.
Sergey L
By the way, individual especially distinguished somes were even awarded titles and presented for awards.
Dmitry V
Som has been partisan in the water since 1940 :) and helped the partisans to destroy the fascist ugliness,
bone and
And why all these bones for 75 years did not come out naturally, the soma had constipation?
Why not remove the thriller? "Some and Other"
I need a monument to be erected...I can arrange to collect money...

I sell an old helmet (good, expensive, laser, integral).
The little boy saw and decided to play astronauts.
I think, well, let it play, what he will do to him, the helmet is designed to fall on the asphalt at speed.
It turned out that the helmet was not designed for the game of astronauts.
I do not sell a helmet.

Head of Fire
I went on a week trip and missed it.
I made a compliment to the secretary that she looked better.

PS Secretary, we have a 65 year old aunt, square-nested design, small roast
The face is more like the grandmother in the rear of the enemy, and if it is painted, then the painted grandmother in the rear of the enemy

Everyone laughed, including the secretary.
She even said dreaming "Maybe he wants me... "

Strange these Japanese... First they invent a bunch of sexual perversions, and then the most interesting things are smeared with pixels. c) Palich

You don’t understand anything in life unless you have seen the eyes of a giant mastiff fleeing from a two-year-old girl shouting, “Ki-i-isya-a!”!" © Shubar

I sit in the lobby of the travel agency, looking at the wall with advertisements. A large scratched inscription with sticky foam-plated letters: LifeInSpain (letter S slightly shifted to the left) I end up sitting, tapping on the inscription LifeIS pain and catching myself on the thought that I can’t disagree.

xxxh: yeah, I will tell you briefly what happened=))) the funniest news - I finally removed the appendix!! (Nond after the 7th attack, well, here I was the fault I didn't believe until the last one that it was ON - the symptoms didn't fit).
xxxh: voooot, and then the circus began - they say to me "you are sticky to stick" and I am like Luke Skywalker "Neeeeeeeeeeet!!!! I don’t want a scar!!" and me so "and we will do without a scarring!" here and I agreed=))) now I do not have an atavistic organ, but there are three holes in the pulse and a glue video (5th series) where the operation is filmed and as a doctor I have a laser scalpel there so fun "pshšššššš""vvvvvvzhik"=)))
xxxh: and I was glad that I was given this video (surprised since I was the only person who asked for this in the home horror collection =))))

D: Yes, call me a man!
Q: Okay, how can I help you?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
In one book (I do not remember the author, so as not to lie) there was a man with a strange name Peter.
Everyone somehow got used to it. Then I asked him why he was called so.
His parents came to register and asked them:
How would you call the boy?
and Peter.
Peter was recorded.

The snow melted and melted the hearts.
My first date in the spring. My husband invited me to a restaurant. It seems like usual, but not. Meetings in the evening, on weekends. This insists on Friday at lunch.
Well, I think a joke with you – Friday is Friday.
We met, as if we were sitting well - and he has a sad-trist face!
I ask, why at lunch?
Would we not like each other? In the evening I have no time anywhere, so I can not hurry to go to the store for a rope and soap.
Here I started to roast, and this spider didn’t even smile!

And the news? I asked.
There is no difference. Let’s say you’re tired of the movie and switched the TV to the news. And you see that the exchange rate has changed in the most fatal way, the miners have fallen in the mine, their children have been insulted by pedophiles, and the economic reform has stolen the future of all the citizens listed. Have you ever wondered what the full amount of information the world media reports about?
It is not so easy to formulate.
“It’s really simple,” said Apollo. It reports on instability and suffering. The world is non-permanent – otherwise there would be no need for news. Instability and suffering are almost the same thing. One inevitably leads to another. Even when suffering is disguised as the pleasure of what is bad for someone else today...
And the internet?
The Internet is our most promising direction. Do you spend a lot of time online?
Well yes, I said. – Although now more and more in the hamlet... But it happens.
Then you must know yourself. A person always goes into the network with the anticipation that he will now catch out of the ocean of information something valuable, interesting and necessary. What happens in three or four hours? He stands up from behind the monitor with the feeling that a flock of pigs has passed through his soul. Moreover, I would say, the Evangelical pigs – in which all the evil spirits of the Middle East had settled before. The man swears he will not waste his time on this wash. Tomorrow he will repeat the same experience.

In our school a few years younger was a boy named Rudy.
He had an older sister, a very nice handcuff, and we, the high school students, liked it very much. The boy was asked about her, and he is flegmatic like that. He once issued:
In the younger classes, the sister was irritated with mercury, and in the older ones, the chest.

xxx: I have a friend here for a cat looking for a house, no one needs it?
YYY: Can I take a picture? Or an abstract cat.
Zzzz: I also don’t mind taking a cat.
ttt: zzz, abstract cat - inherit

The authorities will help Mikhalkov to open the fast food network "Eat at home"
__________________________________________________________________________
Those two rats still wrecked their yards.

xxx: to be honest, the artist from Pasha so himself
xxx: < child's drawing, strongly smelling on the penis>
You will never guess what it is.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYY
YYY: What is it?
Yyy: I don’t even have any assumptions.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I found in the spaces of one of the social locations... "a racing club and a stone under it all:
Tension will remove the gas pedal dropped into the floor, fatigue will obscure the smell of burned rubber, and feelings will kill adrenaline! Speed is a drug that will make you happy.
Oh heh! I had a long time ago a VAZ2106... basically the first car! So when I saw the girl on her, she was terribly scared! switching from 3 to 4 transmission loudly shouted like a sink, said that the run was not very, but if we advance... and the speedometer shooter was already steadily going for 180 and sought to go to the second, or even the third circle... and the girls were eating... They eat!! to
Here's what the cut 2 wheels from the sprinkle in the speedometer do!

Humans are ungrateful animals. First, promise you will kill me if I do, and then, abnormal, what hell have you bound me, where are we going, and why do you have this gun?

Today is WOW. The department at the lecture began to talk about the difficulties arising when transmitting high frequencies. To explain, I began to make an analogy with a water tube. I started by drawing this same slang on the board. And then he drawn up a man in the genre of "stalk, stalk, cucumbers" (immediately arousing the audience's enthusiasm) and signed with big letters "ya santechneg". After which he thoughtfully quoted Ostap's question about the ability to draw, addressed once to Kisa. It turned out that it was not easy to photograph with laughing hands. and :)

In a week I will be forty. I was crying over that joke.

The guy really felt my mood.

When I was 14, I thought 40 years was so far away that it would never happen. It will, but not me anymore. But now I am almost 40, and I understand – it really won’t be! Because I am still 14. There are no adults. There are older children. Sick, gray boys and girls.

Only after U.S. intelligence was finally convinced that there were no Russian troops on the territory of Ukraine, U.S. special forces risked to come for training.

This story was told to me in the museum. I'll tell you later, otherwise it won't be interesting :)

A young man lived in a small Siberian town. Young, 30, sports, ideas and everything with him. He worked in the factory, studied and led an ideologically literate lifestyle.
But he had one big dream - of course blue, unrealistic - he really wanted to find his mother. He no longer expected to find his dad, he felt that he was no longer there, but he wanted to find his mom, his mom. But where can you find a mother when you are the son of the enemy of the people? The boy at the age of 3 got into a nursery, where he was given a different name and surname, and the old data was classified and subsequently destroyed. There was no connection between him and his family. The only thing he remembered from his "old life" was that they lived in a big city, around high buildings, and his mother was called Luba. And yes, he remembered one moment that confused everyone to whom he told him, and that he had already learned to write off on childish fantasies. He remembered he was going to the kindergarten with his mother in the elevator! This is the kindergarten in the elevator.
And he remembered that they were not going down, but going up.
Of course, no one has ever heard of such a kindergarten, and the guy himself has already become accustomed to the thought that the past cannot be returned.
Years went by, the guy learned and, as they say, got into the stream - in the early Brezhnevsky time he grew up to the chief engineer of the factory, and went to advance not just to where, but to the capital.
It was a summer day, Saturday, it was hot on the street, and the guy decided to ride a river tram. Next to him stood a grandfather, very intelligent and conversational. Having learned that the man (and he was already over 30) had never been in the capital, the old man began to conduct him an extensive tour of the places that they swam. Here on the left they swam through the pool "Moscow", and on the left was the gray grove of the famous "House on the Riverside". The old man, obviously familiar with the local life, began to paint the sweet life of the inhabitants of this house, and when the river tram was almost equal to the Kremlin, the old man pointed to the man on a piece of the body of the back of the house, which rose in the form of a superstructure and said: See this superstructure? It is the only kindergarten in the Soviet Union that is on the roof. There are children in the elevator.
Man, what about you? The heart? The Doctor!
......
Further, there were endless inquiries of tenants, associated with a considerable risk (the house only stopped being tightly guarded for a couple of years), and the miracle still happened - the mother of Luba, who survived many years of camps, was found in the usual Moscow public office.