Every time I recall this story and it gets overwhelmed by inconvenience.

At night visitors are few and there is a completely different contingent, but since she was in the center of the city, I often worked with decent and polite buyers.

The man came in the middle of the night and stunned with a list of drugs and (hi-hi) other pharmaceutical range.

The list included expensive drugs, a bunch of different types of condoms and ointments, viagra in the maximum dosage, miramistin in the volume of 1 liter, a bunch of remedies from a hammer and means to restore the liver.

I am all immersed in the thoughts of his fun life, piercing and putting everything in a bag, calling the total amount ~~10,000, and encountering a natural question for the pharmacy:

Oh, and why so much!? to

And my answer, which sounded like a lightning and made us rust in a second:

You have to pay for pleasure!

Once, an older brother asked his mother how she defined the "session" in our apartment so accurately while they and his father were on a trip?

“It’s easy enough, it’s my apartment and I know where and what I have, and you are my kids.

Usually there were three to four guests.

1) For a day - two pot soup was prepared, still in the freezer always a stock of homemade peelings, strawberries, cottlets. And one person a day to eat 4 liters of soup and half the stock

Peelings and wardrobes can’t.

I knew you were drinking. Wine or something stronger. It is not enough to just rinse the fuse under water, there are divorces from water drops.

I immediately saw the beds on which your friends slept, you didn’t make the bed. Thank you for not touching my father’s bed.

For these trips, my father and I did not argue, but for prevention, I did. Did you notice that I didn’t argue with you when a girl came to visit, now my donya-snowha?

How defined it? It’s easy, especially in the kitchen.

1) Lazy for cooking and your maximum, it is to roast eggs, potatoes, cook pelmeni, and from spices salt / pepper, laurel leaf.  Immediately I saw that a “foreign” man was carving in my stocks.

Remove the little ones from the table? You have half the crumbs on the floor, the rest together with the cloth, either in the shell or at the corner weigh. Immediately clean floor and table, the cloth is rinse and hangs on the dryer.

Washing the dishes? The dishes are "washed", all around the dishwasher is in water. When the girl was in the guests, everything around the shell was dry. The water towel hangs on the battery and I saw it used (I hanged a clean towel before leaving).

4) The most difficult thing was to understand if you drank? Snocha wiped the fusies after washing with a towel and tried to put them in the same places as I did.

She always ruled the bed.

That is all! There are no tricks ?

Mom and the little one?

And the little one took all the “best” qualities of our parents.

These are what?

Do you know your son?  He is a good guy, kind, responsive, but greedy and sometimes still a harmful one.

Guests went to him, but never stayed overnight, or he did not leave them. For the guests he was always prepared, something on the table, more needed he did not get or put. Of the father's reserves, you often pulled fluids, the father always kept silent, but the little, on the contrary, replenished these reserves and obviously not at his own expense.

Do you remember the neighbor’s grandmother Zina who lived below us?

and yes.

So here is! The next day, when I was back from work. She told me who we had in the apartment, when they came, when they left, about what they were doing, noise or not. With neighbors you need to be in a friendly relationship, they will tell a lot!

The people are silent as long as the people have what they have.

Hello, I am in the store. What to take?
Are you in a mask?
and yes.
Take a box.

I married early, at the age of 21. My husband, though 5 years older than me, and my second marriage, was as tight as I was in terms of family relationships. We scandalized all the time because of everything. They lived the first time with their parents.

Actually the story itself.

Once again, we fell into dust and dust. My parents were at work, so I just went to the yard because I could not be alone with my husband. In the courtyard we then had a straw, the old Soviet, I attached to it as a child with the tongue in the winter. I sat on her and suffered. And here, I see, my father is going to work. He came, asked what happened, and I told him. And we have to say that he was a person not very emotional, at least from the outside) He listened, sneezed, smoked, and kept silent. I spoke and I also kept silent. And then he begins to stir me slowly, catch-catch, catch-catch. Ever higher and higher, I already help my legs to get higher, faster, catch-catch. Oh, in five minutes already high, the spirit captures what tears, laughter hysterical. That’s how I hit for 30 minutes, my oldest daughter, catch-catch. He sneaks silently, smokes, smiles, and I sneak like a child, these are those memories)))

My older daughter, fifteen years old, approaches me and asks:

- Dad, how can you make money online, it is boring to sit at home in quarantine.

-Well, for you the most optimal option is to master Photoshop and stick hats for social networks and websites, you can draw.

- No, so not to study, but immediately start earning.

There is a variant, Yandex Toloka, called.

I register her, put the crack that no adult content was and give her an account to understand. A few days later, she approached me, almost with tears in her eyes, and said:

“Dad, I worked all day, worked and earned almost nothing.

Welcome to adult life, daughter.

The office where I work is guarded 24 hours a day. They work on a daily basis. There is one remarkable character among them. Uncle fifty years old, shouldered, with military training (like the former - not interested) and without a stomach, although work and sitting. It is remarkable that when any employee enters the office, he always stands up. Same with the exit. And if the employee is a man, then he still comes out of the table (a la reception), approaches and stretches his hand. Moreover, he is also greeted not like everyone, but with a compulsory bowing of the head and regardless of the position and age of the employee. It applies to everyone exclusively on the IO. When communicating little speaking, but always polite. At first it was a bit wild and even funny for me. But then I got used to it and now I know how pleasant it is.



So here. With the introduction of self-isolation measures, we men stopped greeting by the hand. It was not easy and not immediately. It was especially difficult to describe the character. A script that has been flawed for decades has failed.



Today I go to the office, this guard stands up, approaches me and stretches the sprayer with a disinfectant. He sprinkled on my arms and returned to his place. The script is updated and fixed.)

I remember one time I went down with a boss in Moscow in the subway at some accidental station. He stood up in the middle of the platform, turned his head and moved to the left for half a meter.

There will be an entrance!

I looked carefully, there were no signs.

“Wow,” I admirably think, “in so many years I’ve learned all the points on all the stations! Okay, at the beginning of the composition, there from the inscription "Stop the first wagon" somehow can be calculated, but in the center...

The train arrives and the doors are opened exactly where the boss has stumbled.

How did you identify the stop? I cannot withstand...

“Ty,” the boss wondered, “What’s on the street?

September, I don’t understand Monday.

Rain on the street! - explains to the unreasonable boss, - a crowd of people at the entrance of the previous electric train on a granite of wet traces showed. You need to be more careful!

After the introduction for citizens of mandatory local journeys from home to house with passes there and back, citizens finally guessed that it does not matter exactly what is written in a paper called the constitution.

Two large panda Yin Yin and Le Le from Ocean Park Zoo in Hong Kong first coupled after the announcement of quarantine, when all visitors left the park. Previously, the panda had been trying to reduce for 10 years

Everything you need to know about the future.

My husband and I came home from the store.
removed the masks. It turns out that my husband is not mine.
Be careful!

My daughter in first class. After the distance lessons, the teacher leaves 5-10 minutes. Information to parents and answers to current questions.

A classmate's mother: - We were asked to draw a basketball ball. Should we perform if we have a release from physical culture?

When my son was one and a half years old, I abandoned the wheelchair. It is difficult to carry it everywhere, there is no ramp, there are narrow doors, there are passages, and it is heavy. The child walked a lot, and already at this age he could withstand five hours of relentless walk, occasionally crawling over his neck.

When my son was two and a half years old, I went with him to the country store 3.5 km in one direction. A couple of stops for five minutes. I never complained, I never knelt. Neighbors were surprised, they and themselves would hardly pass that route, constant descents and rises.

A year passed. My son was three and a half years old. They came back from the store and he said, “Mom, I’m tired.” “How is it? You walked quietly and wasn’t tired?”

He looked at me, “Yes, I couldn’t talk.”

A friend may be unreal. There are no fake enemies.

She has a classmate Alice. On an online lesson, a teacher asked her to answer one question, beginning with the words: Alice, and call me, please.

The girl Alice on the compact activated her virtual sign from Yandex, which immediately boycotted her readiness to the whole class: I listen to you!

One of the boys reacted first: Alice, turn off the computer!

Following the cool chat, Alice flew out real - the voice assistant did her wet job.

My grandchildren study online. I ask the school administration to give money for new curtains and repair of furniture.

I will share another event from my prehistoric youth.In school, class in the 7th, before the Victory Day we all from the 7th to the 10th grade. They gathered from several schools and went to watch the movie "Boys". A rather heavy film about teenagers who remained orphans after the war and who lived in a children’s home. So, in this film there is a scene where one of the pupils of the kindergarten looks after a young teacher he was in love with.  This teacher goes up to the roof of the sarai to light up. He hurriedly pulled off his shirt and removed it. There is nothing underneath it! On the way to school, I sit in the cinema and watch naked female breasts on the big screen. The emotions of the storm, in the cinema, everyone is afraid to breathe.This moment lasted, a dozen seconds, but we managed to see everything we could. It is now I realize that the breasts were small, and in general so themselves. But then the emotions just shattered. When that moment ended, I looked at our cool girl who was sitting next to her. In such a blow and feathers would crash a armoured projectile. After a while, she died and said, "Then write me a piece on this film." So I want to say, under the USSR, "sex did not exist", but they were not the khanji. Now they are burning all over. Showed somewhat late, about the hour of the night on the channel "Home" the movie "Mr. Robinson", so they mocked the main character, the magnificent Zeudi Ariya breasts. At the hour of night! By the way, this film was also shown in the cinema in the Soviet times and nobody mistaken anything. And here I have the question, who behaves in the hange, the communists or the current “liberal and free power.”

When will you realize that the global threat to humanity is not viruses, but kind fools and idiots. And it is necessary to isolate them, not all in a row.

I once asked a highly educated audience an online quest:

I came across an astonishing biography. Who can guess, not Google, about whom it is:

Awards and awards in the Russian Empire
Order of St. Stanislav II of St.
Order of St. Anna 2nd St.
Order of St. Vladimir the Fourth.
in the USSR
Hero of Socialist Labour
Two orders of Lenin, two orders of the Red Banner of Labor
The city was named in his honor and has not yet been renamed.

The educated audience for some reason immediately remembered Count Ignatiev. This answer is wrong. He was awarded the following Soviet awards:
Medal "For victory over Germany in the Great Patriotic War 1941-1945"
Medal "XX Years of the Workers' and Peasants' Red Army" (1938)

Both awards are somewhat bullying, because Count Ignatiev did not take any part in the early twentieth years of the activity of the Red Army, remaining at this time in France and growing champignons. He also did not participate in the Great Patriotic War by age and distrust of the relevant authorities. Well at least not noticed and allowed to write a book.

I wrote about the absolute record holder in the combination of imperial and Soviet awards. The phenomenon is amazing. Owners of the Order of St. Stalin and St. Anna and St. Vladimir in the USSR was simply opposed to the title of Heroes of Socialist Labour.

Unfortunately, according to the results of the survey, he was unknown to anyone. Here is the funniest response:

Oh shit, who is that?! to
I broke all the tsarist generals and scientists with diplomats, the night did not sleep - who??????? to

Those who wish can try to guess by stopping reading. I extend the condition - you can google as much as you want, if some glorious or shameful historical name itself came to your mind, and you just deal with its awards in Russia and the USSR. This is a good way to appreciate the difference everyone else has with this person.

For a long time he lived in a profitable house on one of the most beautiful streets of Moscow. This street is small, short and unknown. Like a quiet forest river, it flows, hidden by the high crowns of ancient buildings, right next to the spacious dams of the Clean ponds. A rare cyclist will fly to the middle of it, how tempting the streets leaving it. I crossed her hundreds of times and stopped for a few seconds to look at her. But along the Chaplichin Street I never managed to walk. Yesterday confused the passing courtyards and stumbled upon the house with the board "HERE CHAPLIGIN lived". Who is this Chaplin? I was surprised, and I searched.

According to Wiki, it is “one of the founders of modern aeromechanics and aerodynamics.” I recommend reading the entire biography, it’s awesome.
HTTPS://ru.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaплыgin,_Sergy_Alekseevich

He also managed to lead the main female university of Russia for several years, the so-called "Second MGU". And the CAGI, from which Soviet cosmonautics and turboreactive aviation grew. Some of his best developments became relevant only after half a century. A crater on the moon was named in his honor, but I kept silent about it in the quest not to burn. Where else will you find the man with the highest awards of the Russian Empire and the USSR, and also with a crater?

It did not survive the supercomputers of our time. But according to his formulas, written with goose pen and ink, they still work.

He cannot be called the father of space. It only helped solve the technical problem – how to overcome the resistance of our planet’s atmosphere. For the same questionable reasons, it can be considered the father of modern aviation. But she grew up on his formulas.

In this biography I was really surprised by something different. Chapligin became an orphan at the age of two - at the age of 24 from a cholera epidemic died his father, a man of command, a very poor man. And the quarantine was violent no less than it is now, with no fewer victims of the epidemic, and no fewer stupidities of the authorities. The widow was probably desperate. Not only from the loss of the closest person in the color of the years, but also from the future - who needs a widow of a speaker with a baby in his arms, in the midst of quarantine and cholera, in the dark corner of poverty of the Russian Empire? Who needs this child?

He had to be raised. Two years is the most responsible age. A new man has appeared in this world. He starts thinking, asking questions.

I do not know how she endured this, but in this unnecessary child she was able to raise a man who would make up the glory of both the Russian Empire and the USSR. Both countries are no longer with all their awards. But they left Chapligin Street, Chapligin City and Chapligin's formulas.

I wish everyone good health, perseverance of spirit and similar pedagogical success in the upbringing of their own children, thrown into the wreck. Quarantine is not the worst time to explain something important to them.

And of course, the day of space.

I remember how sometimes I went to work and dropped unnoticed, but to go to work secretly from the president - to this life did not prepare me.