bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №107469
 28.12.2014
And what, is the hospital pregnant women-not yet-deleted with a severe course of pregnancy not placed?
Everyone’s situation is different: one employee broke his leg, after a couple of weeks everything was remarkably hardened and got out (it’s true, another week his office work was limited), and the other – also broke his leg, but with a shift, surgery, a killed joint, the implantation of some kind of metal stick... for more than six months on his feet, hardly the final disability passed. Probably, and here the same - where one quietly finishes at least until the eighth month, the other will not get out at the second from the hospital. And the same woman with the first and second child can work differently.

The discussion here reminded me of the old quote "Look - I have exactly the same leg, but nothing hurts!"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №107468
 28.12.2014
Sysadmines more than other men hear the phrase "go into me")))

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №107467
 28.12.2014
to this:
Here’s how you live as a brutal cyclist and you don’t know the grief, and here’s the oh! The mouse!! And suddenly you are all such a girl-girl, standing on the board and demonstrating the upper “la” of your lyrical soprano.

Upper left, it is:"Blue Blue"???? and :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107466
 28.12.2014
The ruble falls.
The euro is growing
Engage in this
Soon is New Year!!! to

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107465
 28.12.2014
How to eliminate manipulation? When they speak quickly, there is no pause. Where there is no pause, there is no room for reflection. It is a continuous flow, hysterical-paphosic, with repeatedly repeated human-hateful vocabulary, it melts you in emotions of despair, fear and aggression. You are fully and entirely in the power of the speaker. These are basically military strategies: you don’t have to think about it, you hear the “Ply!” command and somewhere on social media you’re already shooting the one you’re pointed at.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107464
 28.12.2014
Translated into a language where the causes and consequences are correctly arranged: the woman was lucky with her health and all pregnancies were easy enough, so she continued joyfully to build new and new in the presence of young children. If it had been rinse for three months without the possibility to eat anything, and then put it on preservation at all - of course, it would have grown up before the new pregnancy of the older child at least until school.
So it wasn’t a “no problem during pregnancy because a bunch of children,” but a “no problem because there were no problems during pregnancy.” As a result, the logic turns out - the Olympic champion is running - so his leg is not broken. Let's go and you on your broken leg, jump off the couch and run, you are lying here and sleeping.

ZY: You can't tell me, WHO's scared of all the toxicosis discussed here? Include already the rubric "the cat ate a tree, the cat ate mandarines, the cat ate olives"!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107463
 28.12.2014
This is how you live as a brutal cyclist and you do not know the sorrow, and here - oh oh! The mouse!! And suddenly you are all such a girl-girl, standing on the board and demonstrating the upper “la” of your lyrical soprano...

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №107462
 28.12.2014
It brings memories:
I was unlucky – I got pregnant in the third grade. Misses are unacceptable, for misses of work, and classes we have 6 hours...Eat no time, and not for what, because your child is your problems, as my mother told me and closed the refrigerator to the lock. Well, I studied, I slipped out of the skin, just to not let classes go...On the last day I ran like a racer, I passed a disgusting colloquium - I go home - I feel everything, it is time. I came to the nursery, gave birth in 45 minutes, I didn’t have time! I have classes! And when I now, many years later, read about the regime of the day of pregnant women, and nutrition - I just cry out of envy. Well, this is what I do - indulgence to capriciousness turns any woman into a monster. And if the conditions are very tough, then there will be no caprices.

of harsh conditions. I go in the tram, the term is 8 months, a lady floats up and rushed, that is, the youth of today - will never give up. The old lady sitting in front of me embarrassed her, saying, “Look at who you are chasing.” A woman reluctant to acknowledge her wrongdoing cries:
You’ll think they were born in the steppe before!
The old lady looked at her carefully and kindly said:
Well, if you gave birth in the steppe, you are still in the tram.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107461
 28.12.2014
In general, I think the saying "as you meet the new year, so you spend it" is not quite correct. Rather the opposite "how you spend, so you meet"

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №107460
 28.12.2014
DerArto: 2014 is unique. In it, people who had no money savings felt happier and calmer than those who had them.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107459
 28.12.2014
Damn, three days before the New Year, and they are about politics and hormones. Champagne and mandarins were discussed. Do not forget the anecdotes.

If you had a million dollars, what would you do?
and nothing.
How nothing?
And why?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №107458
 28.12.2014
Here I like these friends who are looking for a sponsor on the "sponsorship", starting with words like "I am looking for a decent man for a rest together.". "Ordinary" is the one who, having paid for her journey, will understand what she will ultimately not give?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №107457
 28.12.2014
Yaroslav Filimonov
Under "Smoke May Beast" even a video where a cat lacks milk becomes hardcore.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107456
 28.12.2014
I call a friend on the phone, takes a daughter:
Hello Hello Hello.
Hi to you.
Dad at home?
No, he is sleeping
When he comes back, let him call.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №107455
 28.12.2014
There are people (and most men are like them) who don’t like children at all. Even their own. Because children are selfish, hysterical, noisy impasse ages up to 12, and then they turn into teens and get even worse.
*****************
As in an anecdote:
A man stands in a museum in front of a portrait of Hitler's mother and says, "What a beautiful woman. Why should I not have an abortion on time?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107454
 28.12.2014
Among the abandoned women there are sometimes those who landed successfully.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №107453
 28.12.2014
Yesterday my 12-year-old son participated in the Christmas school show.
He announced in advance that he was given the role of Joseph Stalin, who tells something to a woman. We were not very surprised, because over the years in the school played many roles, for example, the epic role of Arbuz. Since the show was to be held in a second foreign language (German), we did not specifically specify who, what and why should be. Need to, need to.
It was said - done: the grandmother brought the general lamps to the pants, got the officer's "sweat" boots, made elegant beards, a french with marshal chiefs, looping, a red folder of Generalisimus with a big star, etc.
Prepare to shine.
The disorder was suspected immediately before the show, finding a classmate in the costume... King Solomon.
Before the very beginning of the drama came to light: yes, the son got the role of Joseph. But not Joseph Stalin. Just by Joseph! Who is telling the good news! The Virgin Mary!! This is a Christmas show!!! to
There was no time, and the son went to communicate the good news in the form of Joseph Stalin.
In his costume he had great success. With each of his appearances, the moms in the hall began an unstoppable hysteria, accompanied by tears, cries and quiet enthusiastic cries from somewhere under the chairs.
Since the son was in some confusion, because of the awareness of the burden of his guilt in "confusing" the plunge, the dramatic pauses from Joseph Stalin in the degree of slump, the reaction of the hall, the feeling of universal unity and enthusiasm surpassed the show of Ivan Urgant.
It is understandable – imagine, Joseph Stalin comes to Mary – and it doesn’t matter what he told her there (in German) – anyone would believe it!
Appendix, to the Feast specifically for You: a photo of Joseph carrying the Good News of Mary)

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10205116943470500&set=a.1318879219340.47466.1451565715&type=1

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №107452
 28.12.2014
If a black cat crossed your road twice, did it cancel trouble or double it?
If the cat is vector, then canceled, if scalar, then doubled.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №107451
 28.12.2014
This is:
There is a cruel truth of life - hormones are thrown into the bloodstream and together with the blood get into the brain. You are so proud of yourself and so stubborn in your reluctance to perceive or at least look at information long confirmed by multiple medical studies that is just unpleasant to read. I don't care, but it's not easy for your loved ones to live with such a self-satisfied limited person.
___
When I was about 11 years old, I began to have menstruation. Adolescence, all this, happened, was covered with anger, irritation. Until one day, soon enough, suddenly did not come to my mind, which covers me before menstruation. That is, I am angry for no reason, but simply "hormones". And so I was ashamed that I, as a reasonable person, was controlled by hormones and instincts... I’m 27, the last six I’m married. I still get angry sometimes. But I remember that it shouldn’t control me, and I hold myself in my hands, maximum – headphones in my ears, music, and get distracted, if it’s really bad – I think of the autumn forest, not before meditations. We think of a child, and for some reason I believe that no medical research will convince me that you can break down on loved ones, justifying yourself with hormones... We are people, after all.
It is....
The fact that all people are different, and the attack of hormones affects them unevenly removed specifically to bring themselves to the example as a model? Oh you naive boasting rabbits.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107450
 28.12.2014
I also roam:

At the very beginning of the 90s, when the ruble did not collapse, he inherited a lot of money, for which he could buy three cars, if they were sold as they are now. As a result, following the advice of people like you, after all kinds of reforms and devaluations, he bought just one refrigerator for that money.

and----
I was presented in that period for 18 years a bookshelf, such as with a start-up capital for independent living. The money was for three-quarters of the new Jigules. But I gave it on the condition that I would film it in N years, I do not remember how much exactly. By that time, it will accumulate a whole bowl. An urgent contribution without the right of withdrawal before the deadline. As a result, for this amount, I bought a jacket on the market, but could not pick up the pants and handed it over to the commission. Six months later, when the jacket was finally sold, I bought a chocolate for that money. This is how I ate almost a whole new car with tea in 5 minutes.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna