bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №106209
 02.12.2014
Just throw that sex nonsense out of your head – and live for yourself, not as they show in the movies. The movie lies.

===

Cinema is nothing. I learned that there are women’s novels. This is where all the roots of the "insatisfaction" young virgins come from! What do you think of the episode: "After breakfast they sat in the living room until lunch, then doing love, then looking at the fire of the fireplace?" Well, guys, raise your hand, who doesn’t have half a day to fucking fuck? Between the case? That is. Young women expect this. This is not to mention that, judging by these opus, a man is not more difficult to make love than to sneeze − you think, a day in the field smelled like a horse! Happiness will come, at noon will satisfy his unseen, then with a smile will fall asleep, and in the morning will bring coffee to bed.
And yes, in these novels heroes do not eat. Absolutely. Therefore, for the young virgins raised on them, the appearance of a normal man, who instead of reading poems and singing sunsets passes the third plate of potatoes with meat, plunges into shock and horror. Well, this is another story.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №106208
 02.12.2014
to this:
Bas from a youth resource has turned into gays from people with teenage children. The wicked.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
You see, in 10 years some managed to get married and have children. Time is such a strange thing.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №106207
 01.12.2014
Two people like each other and want to
Doing love for (exclusively)
Sex and mutual pleasure -> sex. Two people love each other and want to give a friend
Certain guarantees before
Building the Future (i.e. invested
Working together in a relationship –> marriage. Everything else is paranoia, parasitism and
and deceit.
-
Is sex in marriage a deception? And love without marriage is madness? And without marriage and sex is parasitism?
Binary logic is good :)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106206
 01.12.2014
The suggestion:

>>>PizDaint is a Swiss supercomputer ranked 6th in the world with 6.27 PFLOPS. And, judging by the name, he should either engage in calculations of the consequences of nuclear explosions or in linguistic analysis.

PizDaint (or more accurately, Piz d'Aint) is the name of the mountain in Switzerland, translated from the Romanesque language as "the inner peak". The element piz is often found in the names of Swiss mountains, such as Piz di Pian, Piz dal Ras, Piz Dado, and if you are still reading this, Piz della Forcola.

[ + 15 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №106205
 01.12.2014
She wants to get pleasure (for any healthy girl sex is a pleasure, no less than for a man) and any material profit (time, gifts or gifts are material goods), doing nothing for it. Why should you pay for sex, why not get pleasure from each other?
– – – – –
Sex is pleasure, yes. With a skilled man who in bed thinks not only about himself, looking at porn, but also about the pleasure of his wife. It can be done without flowers.
But the average guy gives pleasure to a woman or does not know or does not want to. So here he will have to compensate for it so that at least someone in bed will suffer him.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №106204
 01.12.2014
On the website of the alcohol shop:

07:50 28.05.2013
Olga → I often get this store, I have a small child and have no time to go shopping, and they have a good range and on the date all the products are fresh! The apartment will be brought to the right time and you can not be distracted from homework.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №106203
 01.12.2014
to this:
From the discussion on the News "Apple Designer will refine the hunting weapon Beretta" xxx: More rebranding will be held and will be called IGun xxx: Cartridges can be purchased only in the official store. xxx: Cleaning can only be done in the official SC."
And the new chip "the bending trumpet" - kill the beast from outside the corner!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №106202
 01.12.2014
Session and Debt
Galina: Have you seen the videos of girls singing on vibrators?
I saw them reading on vibrators.
Galina: so, why did I start writing seminar work and generally set up for study ONLY under their singing XD XD XD
Tagged with: ahahha
Galina: I've been playing their song for 6 hours in a row.
I have norm.
I think they can concentrate and normally sing while sitting on artificial vibrating hooks, so I immediately concentrate and gather with the spirit and sheep the horse.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106201
 01.12.2014
Seven years ago I stood somehow in a traffic jamming on the Painting Bridge. Who does not know Moscow is a new bridge, very long, because it goes down the stream of the river, where the radiation - and the shores there are environmental protection, and they can not be paved a road.
Since the bridge is new, the GPS doesn’t know about it and goes crazy trying to put a point on the offshore.
Then hangs, but after a while eats joyfully.
I see a new route.
On the river! with the name of the farmer. With some signs (bags, what?) To the place, the good on the Frunzenskaya coastline should have been.

Two programs in one, fucking.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106200
 01.12.2014
TRYBA: I wish in the new year in everything to be the 1st, to have the 2nd half, not to be the 3rd over, to have your 4 corners, so that everything in life was on 5, to have the 6th sense and to be in the 7th sky of happiness!
Monty Burns: Drink the Baltic 8 and ride the 9
Shineel Gogol: And get a 10.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №106199
 01.12.2014
Non-existent birds are not glutes!
These sprites are designed to save the resources of the server on which the simulator of the universe we are inhabitants is launched.
A variety of sounds is an embient that has gone into synchronicity with the actions of the characters.
We live in the MMO.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №106198
 01.12.2014
Would you like me to give you Rosenthal?

P.S. “Sugging boiling water” is something venereal, right?
and +++++++
Wait, now before talk and winged expressions, we will be there. With this arrangement, I can also say that Rosenthal cannot be given, slavery is illegal.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106197
 01.12.2014
To the joke about the queens on the pants: respected ordinary girl (with pants) sincerely wish to raise self-esteem. Trying to look less victimized. Stop looking at the queen. Dear Queen, success and humility are not synonyms. I'm quite successful, but I don't seal the shelf with a cart, and I don't drop girls with cheeses from the box if I have a mountain of food. And yes, I’m happy to push the queen’s carriage off the doorway so that she won’t find it. Don’t think of yourself as a puppet of the earth, dear ones. Learn to live in a civilized society. With respect, a successful married lady over 30, a lover of fatty cheese.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №106196
 01.12.2014
The Civilization 6. Advice to the player.
When planning an annexation, make sure that the backbone sector of your economy does not rely on international loans.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №106195
 01.12.2014
Gap problems can lead to unexpected problems

Do you need immoral help?
What? what? The frogs!
You are what? This is about anal aid.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №106194
 01.12.2014
To the curious who thought about heating the blood :-).
I read this quote while at work, and while I work in the hospital and because of the duty of service, I often transfuse blood. Blood packs are stored in the refrigerator, so yes, it is heated before transfusion. And the patient during the procedure usually does not feel anything special)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №106193
 01.12.2014
Hey in the group almost newbie but the desire to eat a lot ready to try and learn something new in sex is not selfish
Q: Are you a futurist?
I don’t want a new one.
You simply deny the syntax entirely.
WOW: This is what

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №106192
 01.12.2014
xxx> she called me wild on the sea a year ago in a placard with five girls
xxx> I immediately have some horror film footage, where five girls and a guy went with a crowd somewhere to rest, then "let's share", and first kill a guy

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №106191
 01.12.2014
My sister was tired today. (An important note: it is of low growth).

We came home with her, I sat down at the computer, suddenly she minutes after 5 begins to run around the apartment and look for her phone. He says to me: "Call me". I call her number, the phone rings somewhere.

It turned out that as soon as she entered the apartment, she put the phone on the refrigerator, and then took off her heels and when she looked for it all over the apartment, she did not see it on the refrigerator. Lower in growth.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №106190
 01.12.2014
On the bushes, the holiwar speaks about the beaded queens. Everything would be nothing but a striking moment - the corresponding primadonna, considering herself successful in excuse for the lack of education, ends her reply with a proposal to the girl to "pull the shirt into the store and squeeze over the mountain of food for a regiment of soldiers." To make the queen feel, yes. Considerations of culture, convenience, good taste and other things will be left aside, it is too subjective for everyone. The question is, why do people dig a hole? It is one thing to overwhelm a decent girl with her hatch, who will not blow up the scandal - and it is quite another, if two queens come across in the store and start to find out loudly who of them is the queen, if Crimshild and Brungilda are not confused with the stream, or with the threshold of the cathedral - here is the fear and horror really begins. Thus, it would be to fear their image and likeness, and not to offer for imitation - for their own well-being. Different people will somehow peacefully separate, but the same - shish.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna