bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №104049
 14.10.2014
To get to know a man, Tamara does not go to a restaurant, theater or museum, she just comes to the supermarket and chooses one of those who have long chosen pelmeni.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №104048
 14.10.2014
Where can I get a salary of 40,000 rubles without education?
in Belarus

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №104047
 14.10.2014
I recently got to work. The group is fun, not a day of anecdote. As soon as the boss blows out, sorry, sort with the words:
I don’t eat sweets anymore!
I: What, did you get caught up?

© TheSlayerAtheos

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №104046
 14.10.2014
You have already busted.
Friendship is when one cares, wastes time, puts a bubble, and the other uses it stupidly. And the most important thing in the concept of friendship is that the object number 2 holds the object number one, as a spare option, or simply as a convenient toy, while regularly giving the object number one the hope that this is what will happen. And what you are writing here is described by one phrase, already sounding on this resource "Shovinist cretinism in virgins", and in the course of both sexes.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №104045
 14.10.2014
>> pricing: "CD single-use b/u".
*********
The menu in the strict Soviet plum, one of the lines:
"Pelmen B/U" As it turns out, the correct version of the decryption - "No vinegar". We just didn’t invent it.)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №104044
 14.10.2014
Once my grandfather (an aviation engineer) came home and asked his grandmother (a surgeon) about the disease that happened to his colleague. He said the following:
D: Listen, here xxx has hemorrhoidal conjunctivitis, is it not dangerous?
After about five minutes of laughter, I answered:
B: I don’t know if it’s dangerous or not, but you just stretched your eyes to your ass.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №104043
 14.10.2014
Agriculture Minister Dan Jorgensen said it was time to ban sex with animals in the country.

Roof: Roof: Roof: Roof:

Origin: It's time to stop this evil, the striker said a month later, and the stewardess was excavated.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №104042
 14.10.2014
From the Tyrant

How to remove flower numbers?

Open the paddle.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №104041
 14.10.2014
And to me, in the slogan "Gazelle-changes everything" I hear "Gazelle-changes everything" and I remember our first car, in which my husband changed almost everything, and she still wildly ripped, did not peel, ate oil and boiled even in the winter)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №104040
 14.10.2014
Nafiga Microsoft bought Minecraft.
YYY: The pastion has already hit everyone. In the second service pack there will be tanks.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №104039
 14.10.2014
Dialogue in the office.
Collega A: No, he doesn’t eat fish. Only what he himself will catch.
Colleague B: Yes, he and the women too.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №104038
 13.10.2014
Anko
I know how to make two types of pizza.

Anko
"square" and "square"

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №104037
 13.10.2014
After none with Moldova, many fans are interested in the question: can the Russian football team get to the 2018 World Cup?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №104036
 13.10.2014
XXX: My mom told a story from my childhood, I mean in my childhood I was very hard, up to 11 years old, and when there was a kindergarten there was a quiet horror. There was a morning in the kindergarten, all the children are teaching verses, and I am teaching, I do not tell my mother, the teacher said a surprise for parents. Well, in the morning, it is my turn, I get up with all this coloring, with a huge red band on my head, in clothes imported from abroad from relatives, I open my mouth and I give "Kha khichit vohon khaja, kachaul, ghabez phopaj.
All the words in this verse were with the scratched letter “R”... people laughed, cried... and knocked very loudly at the end.
In the end, it turned out that my teacher hated my mother, and here... played out... And I got rid of the fear of the scene and forever worn out in my memory a lovely poem :)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №104035
 13.10.2014
My beloved neighbor has been drilling for a few years. As it turned out later, the neighbor painted a painting on the wall with a perforator.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №104034
 13.10.2014
Prove that you are not a camel!
yyy: Buttons, legs and tail - here are my papers!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №104033
 13.10.2014
xxx: I am sure that even in the zombie apocalypse, there will be a bunch of idiots who will defend the rights of the "alternative living".

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №104032
 13.10.2014
I realized from my life experience that the first sex after coming from the army is a million times more cool than the first sex in life!!! to

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №104031
 13.10.2014
Nazgul:...I know why toys in the kidder are easier and easier!
Korotkovat: Tell us this mystery, O Great
Total decrease in ICQ!

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №104030
 13.10.2014
A friend complains that she can’t choose a decent refrigerator:
Most refrigerators have failed the main test - they do not get a pot with borsch. A lot of small shelves put a piece of raw material, no more. At the same time, they have a freezer with one giant drawing box, the bodies can be hidden. Well, what a diet: from cheese and bodies. Absolutely unbalanced..."

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