One man, a servant of worship, had a dog, a good dog, lived with him for 15 years and he loved her. But then, after a series of unforeseen circumstances, a piece of meat fell into her legs and teeth, which entailed the fact of slaughter, considered, however, as an act of prosecution with the execution of a sentence.

Then the religious figure without performing the Orthodox Christian ritual handed over the broken body to the earth, set up a tomb monument, and as an epitaphia decided to recreate the course of events, forgetting to provide for an emergency exit from the recursion.

Comments to the news about the decline in laptops sales due to the new iPhone6:

The xxx:
"Because of the new iPhones there is a rising price of gasoline"
"Because of the new iPhones this year will be winter"
"Because of the new iPhone black organ sales market is overcrowded"...

YYYY :
In one of your headlines at least there is common sense.

On mobile phones in general and Nokia in particular.

I was washed in jeans after the piano. I called her in the laundry. She shone and turned. I almost died of laughter, though it was my only tyliphon. Then, indeed, almost killed the debilloid, which before drying the battery re-inserted. And still, the infection, worked for six months, though, without sound.

I often have the feeling that the phone is ringing. And in a few seconds he really calls. What is this? The phone can be on the table or in the pocket. It could be written to coincidence, but it happens too often.
- Powerful radiation before calling :) Just wear a foil cap so that you don't feel this radiation.
Start worrying when you’re guessing a caller or receiving a text message before you pick up the phone. and :)
What to do if it is?
Start sending SMS without a phone :)
By the way, it often happens. You go and think, “I need to call my mom.” And here’s my mom calling ?
- Pff, this is a normal phenomenon for a portion of calls and SMS. When the phone came late in the evening, my mother called me. If the SMS on the day of the salary in turn all sitting in the office - the bank writes. If the SMS has two administrators at the same time - something fell and the SMS from monitoring. If a series of SMS from one of the administrators – generally #$@%#@$

The 8-year-old son is studying in the Cossack Corps. From this quarter to them in the squad came the only girl. Now the teacher begins the lessons with the words "Boys and girls!", which naturally causes the friendly whistling of the whistle.

X: Sonja got caught in the country, how to get out?
This is the xxx (photo)
Buy a cage and feed.
ZZZ is cute! What does it hinder you?
AAA: The meeting question - how to get them in the country?

xx: the continuous increase in the density of the fairy finally reached the point of absurdity
I find it hard to push it out with one hand :D
xx: I will take him out with a water blade!

There is a narrow circle of reasonable people, but it is a saving circle.

It is good to live who has a banker neighbor.

Good in the homeland
It smells like shit and shit.”

Ten years ago, I and my neighbors were mocked... in the real sense. The neighboring poultry factory decided not to squeeze with the chicken butt and began to roll it out to the neighboring field. The fragrance filled the surroundings. Billions of flies were fertilizing and multiplying. The butterflies from overfeeding could no longer fly and their walk resembled pregnant grandmothers. The frogs were equal in size to the cats and walked at night with a thick solid bass.The stacks of frogs that ate off left, and not flew south.The frogs dropped the highest pilot and moved in the take-off mode, rushing to the flight. The whole nature rejoiced.
We, who accompanied the inhabitants of the village, were a mosquito-filled protest minority.
It is with shame to admit that at first we naively annoyed the authorities with clauses, forgetting the main rule of this country - "Rush-Rush".
The authorities did not react without humor.
The smelly peasants from the spring called the commission, and shouted, and - a miracle! She has arrived!
to the baptism.
And honestly recorded the undeniable fact that no flies were found at -20 Celsius. Fuck them, fuck them, fuck them. They talk.
Here, you understand, the people of chickens grow, the people feed, and these anti-chickens curl their nose. The smell of it, you know, not that!
And fall into the city, smell the spirits, what do you clean up in the village to do!

I had withheld from my last strength the calls for criminal prosecution. At night, I dreamed of road mining schemes and fire cards.
The demons were constantly trying to catch me. For example, an experienced beetle, grimmed under a deceitful drunk man for a long time persuaded to change the anti-tank mine TM-57 for a bubble.
I refrained from buying.
I did not want to go under Article 205 (Terrorism). Especially for breaking the shit.
It is a pity to drive. The deaf man smelled me painfully, and here on the sufferer even the fecal guerrilla organizes the assembly.
Saved from the purchase in time popped up in the memory.

Yaroslavl boys, thieves
The man was fucking offended.

Help came from where we did not expect. Banker Semen divorced his wife and moved to live in his previously empty mansion.
The flies, not understanding the numbers, sat on a millionaire. Senna was amazed. came to me.
Max is healthy.
The Seed of Stepanic.
and yours. I have a question for you. The National.
I stumble in advance.
You didn’t get a passport, right?
Why suddenly?
Why are these executions Egyptian? There, like the flies were placed on the ground of Kemt for not raising your shlagbaum at the border on time. I thought, and the frogs.
Well yes. If there is no water in the crane. No, Semen, we have nothing to do with it.
And who to?
The cockroaches are shameful.
Explain the thought.
What to explain here? You see the truck?
and well.
Well, he’s fucking out of the poultry factory to that field of luck. Dozens of people ride here every day. The questions?
Oh you are! And long ago?
Yes from last year.
M is. Do you want to slander?
and?
You will not regret going. I am bored alone.
And we went!

Senya spoke to someone on the phone for 5 minutes, then called two security cars, we spit in his Maybach and the cavalcade touched. As it turned out, not far away.
The guard stopped the fucking car, the bodyguard swunged the driver to the right and sat behind the wheel.
The procession began in a new composition. I got out of the hood.
and Senya:
What are you breaking?
It’s the first time I’ve seen a member and a fucker in the same company. Even under guard. Full of Sur.
Where are we going, by the way?
in the guests.
to whom?
The owner of the chicken.
Are we not imprisoned?
Let me cut off his egg personally.

We go to the cottage village. The guard broke, but did not interfere.
Go to the 4th floor building. The self-driving unfolds and drops the content directly onto the upper gates. Yeshua is! This is the smell! It is in Maybach.
I silently applauded. and worthy.
Senna is little. Melting and clamping his nose with a cloth, he approaches the fucking pyramid and throws some white paper from the top.
We have gone!
Would I dare to know what you left there?
The visit card. We ask for mercy.
very strongly!

The next day bulldozers appeared in the field and buried the cacao birds in the tranche for a week.
Since then, we have been quiet, to hunger, to the grace of God. Only the hungry birds whisper and with tears remember the former abundance.
and Amen.

When the boss has nothing to do, the subordinates immediately have a lot of problems.

From the forum:
I did not notice a sharp change immediately. Therefore, the first signal that special changes are coming was the absence of critical days. Test confirmed it. I finally found out when I went to the doctor.

Many have probably heard that a number of drug poisonings have recently occurred in Russia. In order to continue the development of this topic. Title on the news site: "The number of citizens who have been poisoned with an unknown drug is decreasing" Well, yes, it is decreasing, after such poisoning it is probably difficult to survive...
The point is that the number of poisonings has decreased.
The rich Russian language - not everyone is allowed to use them properly.

I am dealing with delivering products to the shops. Work is well paid, but boring to shame. So, if I hadn’t imagined saving the city from starving death every day, I would have been asleep for a long time.

And I imagine that I bring the light of information technology into the masses :D
Any work becomes boring after a while.
Therefore: sport, music, self-development, Buddhism / yoga / philosophy. Who is closer =)

In the zoo shop.
I am :
- Good day, give such a food for rats.
My husband thoughtfully:
Are you sure they can feed people? Buy me normal food!

I asked the girl what she was interested in, she replied:
Yes to absolutely unnecessary things – anthropology, population genetics
Art and philosophical discussions. I like to read
And I study two languages - French and Hebrew, I know English
What about you?"
WOW: So what about you? and :)
HH: And what am I? I found no answer to the detailed description except "I am an alcoholic" =(
This is a success xD

A conversation between two colleagues at work.
My husband complained for a while. The first wife was a brunette, and the second also a brunette. I have dreamed of having sex with a blonde all my life.
Well, I decided to arrange a surprise for him at DR, I bought myself a platinum pearl.
I arranged a romantic evening, candles and champagne, all things.
WOW: And what then? Did he like the blonde?
HH: How to say.
XHH: In the morning he gave me out: "Mom, sex with a blonde, sex with a brunette - one her. I have not noticed any difference at all".

I remembered. My friend, a lover of horizontal adventures, slept with his brother's wife, with the wives of 2 friends and managed to maintain good relationships with everyone.
I do not invite him home. away from sin.

The husband, feeling that everything wildly irritates him, wants to take valerian. After unsuccessful attempts to forge out the blister from the box, the box was violently torn into pieces.
Wife: What is it about you? You can’t get so upset with stuff!
And don’t say... He’s angry himself.

I ordered pizza yesterday. I have 4 thousand in my wallet and 4 hundred notes.
Order of 700r.
The courier arrives. I say, I only have a cutter, or I can give 1200 if I have 500.
He also apologizes - I took the order gave 5k, all the little things for the delivery - keep the order, and I'm going to exchange and we calculate
And I have some swing, give me 5k, I say.
I have just 4300, I have 4300, and you have 5, the difference is 700.
rightly?
He is so – yes, it seems right.
I felt five. The courier told what the previous employer was unclear.
Tom is separated.

After a while I arrived... (Jap)

The parents bought the first view (a long time ago), a friend gave them a porn tape. and. I haven’t seen it yet :oops: Pappa told me, take it, we don’t get to sleep at work.