bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №103769
 07.10.2014
My grandmother is burning. We come from Dacia. The door into my room was carefully broken. I ask: What had to be?
I have no right to sleep on your couch. How you are not ashamed!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №103768
 07.10.2014
[12:37:54] Sofi J: Throw here the case study in our office – the smell of burnt wire throughout the office, the girl in the neighboring building on the lower floors also complains that there is nothing to breathe, the head hurts and all that. They said at the reception, everyone looked like, smelled, found out - the builders at the neighboring building of the lamb roasted :D

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №103767
 07.10.2014
Winter screams: vodka... it’s cold! Spring requires champagne. Beer is cold! And only autumn will come quietly, putting his hand on his shoulder and stealingly say, "Well, what about the cognac?"

XXX: Unfortunately, usually everything happens differently... And only autumn will come quietly, putting his hand on his shoulder and stealingly say: Noxspray, fervex and aspirin.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №103766
 07.10.2014
Friends came to visit yesterday, remembered...
I am waiting for the third, all of this in pregnancy and health - lying down, but allowed to lie at home.
My friends came to visit me.
Nadia cuts the salad to the table and fries the meat.
Xusha extracts the knots that I didn’t have time before introducing the laying position.
I sit on the sofa in the middle of the room.
And not from this nor from this I say: "And I am giving birth to the father of the king again in the days of the king."

A minute of silence.

Then: "Now we understand why the one you quoted was thrown into a barrel and thrown into the sea".

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №103765
 07.10.2014
We use free testing. The code is complex, and often works on the principle: “Buyed bread – the balcony door stopped opening on tuesdays”.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №103764
 07.10.2014
xxx: *link to video* - the spectrum of human hearing
xxx: check your hearing or your columns)
xxx: you can stretch the headphones to the maximum volume and catch the catch)
Go to Nafiq
YYY: I powered this fucking, my cat got crazy
You have a new pillow!

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №103763
 07.10.2014
About love, the most important verse: John 3:16
“For God so loved the world that he gave his only-begotten Son, that everyone who believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life.”
— — —
Give me two!
You know, I have always adored these cults, where the evil fucking jagwe-perversor created people, allowed them to sin, driven out of paradise, drowned once, then sent himself in the form of his son to the Jews to be nailed.
And all this shit he did out of love.
Write more urgently.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №103762
 07.10.2014
The two youngest children decided to bring all the textbooks to school yesterday. All of them! My father barely brought them home from school.
Why Why?! to
- A teacher from the neighboring class will check how they are wrapped.
- Repeat after me: "The Ministry of Health prohibits children of younger school age from carrying more than three kilograms of weights!"
Oh yes, really what? and shock:
- Your task is to get rid of the idiots, and with the norms of the Ministry of Health then we will understand.
Days passed, no calls and no recordings.

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №103761
 07.10.2014
You will plan-
Drop on the hole!
The Cabbage Fight
Android is Blade
You get in the eye!
Tagged iPhones
In the teeth out.
by SAMSUNG
Grab them the grave.
And that there is strength
Drain the earth.
Nokia is ancient.
Let the worms eat them!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №103760
 07.10.2014
X: What are you doing?
Y: I look at work.
X is?
Y: It is well worth it!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №103759
 07.10.2014
XX: The oldest classy today calls me: "On Saturday there will be a city holiday in honor of the family, there and there, your family we have nominated from the school as a positive large family, and you are invited to the parade and in full composition". And he adds: "Come down, please, or I will be blasphemed". And most importantly: "And take the spade with you!":shock: :D I wonder what a holiday is that?! to
Choose to:
October 1 - Day of the Elderly
October 1 - Day of Music
October 4 - Day of GO and CS
October 5 – Teacher’s Day
October 5 - Day of Criminal Investigation
6 October (1st Monday of October) - World Doctor's Day
10 October - Day of Mental Health
XX: the journey invited us to the last :D as patients

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №103758
 07.10.2014
News from Ukraine:

The terrorists brought Russian textbooks to schools in Luhansk.


[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №103757
 07.10.2014
We will survive any catastrophe. Only today we remembered how in the 90s the young specialists who came to production were confused by the calculation of a complex metal construction. One of them refused, he was a trio. The great man also could not, "no you naffig, such a responsibility". The solder of the elderly swallowed, without calculations, as his intuition suggested, and a lenient experience. The iron still stands.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №103756
 07.10.2014
I sell an iPhone 6. Unspoiled and unspoiled.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №103755
 07.10.2014
XHH: but in general yes, so that all 7 lines are perpendicular to a 7mm space.
Yyy: don’t be lazy, Anton, write 2v, 3rd and 7th)))

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №103754
 07.10.2014
to this:

My wife decided to cut her hair. Yesterday I showed a photo of my new hair, asked for an opinion. I said I don’t like it completely, but I like it as it is now. Today I cut my hair, came pleased, asked for an opinion again. I answered honestly that it was bad. He is upset, does not talk. And so every time.
The women! If you are interested in your husband’s opinion – listen to him, or don’t ask any shit!

A brief summary of the author’s style: Men! Ecli you want logical actions, don't marry stupid chickens, or don't complain about the shit!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №103753
 07.10.2014
XXX: What is an oxymoron?
yyy: Combination of untold
zzz: The phrase "I wrote a good code" is a clear oxymoron.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №103752
 07.10.2014
- I came across an interesting article, there is a comparison of Italians and Russians. The conclusion is that the Russians are dumb Italians, and the Italians are funny Russians.
That’s why I didn’t like them so much! Everyone is having fun, shit.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №103751
 07.10.2014
When I remember my grandfather, I will always remember his great sense of humor.
I remember when I was a child, when I was about 6 years old, I came to visit him with my mother.
He met me at the threshold and in his own manner decided to play with me. He put a ball under my feet and says, “Let’s pin, I’ll catch it,” “To my surprise, the ball was unbeatable and almost didn’t move from place. Grandfather even more stunned me; "Pin the stronger! And as I didn’t pin him he almost didn’t spin, and like a pinal he was very much and the leg was already hurt, but the ball didn’t want to spin. I don’t know how long it would last, but my mom came and said it was a strawberry.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №103750
 07.10.2014
Arch: Symbolic
Arch: One-third of Heracles’ feats were to do something.
Arandir: Or give someone a puddle
Arch: Yes, it’s okay if there’s a hydra or a lion.
Arch: but backward
Arch: The Hero that Ancient Greece Deserves

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