bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №75847
 14.01.2013
The increase in power in a pair of horses is usually well noticeable only by the owner. Because if you do not notice it, it will be very sad for the money spent.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №75846
 14.01.2013
xxx: Pleased advertisement in the Moscow metro: "You will be able to meet with Orthodox priests and get a free consultation psychologist".
YYY: Meet an Orthodox priest and get a psychologist consultation for free!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №75845
 14.01.2013
Ginger ‎(11:15)
In the night from Saturday to Sunday, an unknown man broke the lock of the front door, entered the apartment of a businessman and stole two wristwatches worth a total of 2 million rubles, male clothes worth 1 million rubles and a cat of the Bengal breed worth 120 thousand rubles. Ruby was to the police.
I fucking
Fuck to Fuck
of the diamonds?
I have 5 years to work.
Ka ‎(11:18)
Fuck, Fuck, Fuck for what
Ginger ‎(11:18)
The cat is to blame for everything.
He broke everything.
Ka ‎(11:24):
Well, yes, who else could know that the watch and clothes for 3 lamas, well, and an alibi to myself - I found myself not on the washing machine, I crushed for 100 strings, I dropped myself with the kidnapped, and I was also sorted off.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №75844
 14.01.2013
Gnomes do not like elves. It is axiom. This is Canon. This is an inviolable rule.
If you read it somewhere or see it differently, know that you are foolishly lying. Because no sensible technician will voluntarily cooperate with the Ipanut humanitaries. =) is

AASTER(s)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №75843
 14.01.2013
*Lilac*:Please tell us if you can buy and put the 1C program on a home laptop, for the accountant.
The license is not expensive.
Version - preferably 8.2, configuration accounting Prof. But if there are other options, we will consider, of course, for remuneration.
(Then it will need to be updated periodically - I will immediately ask for advice on this issue.)
Gobzavr: Please tell the medical staff if it is possible to steal a bowl of bread for employees. I will eat at work with a few people.
Buying in the store is not expensive.
Version - preferably black, configuration with an outline. But if there are other options, we will consider, of course, for remuneration.
(Then you will need to steal the pancakes with the mac periodically - I will immediately ask for advice on this issue.)

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №75842
 14.01.2013
Judging by the screams of my neighbors, from "Sunshine" to "Pidoras!" only one step

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №75841
 14.01.2013
Saphiroth:... And this warm piece is beating in your hand like a little heart...
Mirca: Anton, we’re still talking about your socks?

[ + 19 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75840
 14.01.2013
I noticed that on the cape of my silver bandley there were nearby ugly crustaceans. How to get rid of it?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №75839
 14.01.2013
By the method of pouring wax into the water, I reminded myself of a Stranger, Varenik and some unknown to science helminth.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №75838
 14.01.2013
Female and male flirting is like art gymnastics and football. Women go out to the pitch purely with tapes, and men specifically to score a goal.

by Bl. I would not compare it to football. Especially in Russian.)

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №75837
 14.01.2013
Superman 2 in 1980

You must learn to beat your ass if you want to be a peacemaker!

The First Principle of the United States

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №75836
 14.01.2013
Question: A good name for a domestic flying vampire mouse?
One of the answers, literally a scream of the soul:
MacGyver1968
11-16-07, 10:13 PM
The Ex Wife.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №75835
 14.01.2013
Commentary on the Italian bath from the latest collection:

A great corner!

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №75834
 14.01.2013
The husband's reaction to the wife's experiment with an intimate hairstyle (made a smile at the salon)
Oh, and the shit smiled to me.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №75833
 14.01.2013
xxx: category sims - it is generally lol
xxx: brutal humor, sexual themes, violence scenes
YYY: The Sims? Yes, maybe there you can create a gay and destroy families, kill, but rude humor???Ahhh seriously?
xxx: yes
xxx: "your mom lauma"

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №75832
 14.01.2013
She: And I dreamed of a dirty girl today, what would it be for?
Tag: to epilepsy

[ + 17 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75831
 14.01.2013
Placed an action with gifts for repairs of apartments, noticed later (much later - a month later), how the action was written (the gap was missed).
Here is the action itself:
Order a repair!
When ordering the repair of the apartment, you get a gift: a toilet van.
I wonder what customers think. and :)
The rhinestone...

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №75830
 14.01.2013
The realtor. I do not know who accepted applications there... the street "26 Baku commercials" and the street "Sto Livarov"...

Your neighbor on the party there accepted applications, with whom you were struggling in the classes of fools and walked through the classes!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №75829
 14.01.2013
Early in the morning, I went through the park to work, all in the snow, white and beautiful... There were almost no people, only a young family.

A little boy, shouting "shish", picked up a dog's cock and wore it to his mother. I don’t know how he gave it to her, but my mom slipped and fell :). Dad just stood, watched and didn’t react. Then the boy said, “It remains to be found this protein.”

[ + 37 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №75828
 14.01.2013
It turned out that there every businessman took the child under the wing so that the company paid less taxes. 20 thousand each month on the account lists, gifts, clothes, food. And you say, about >children do not think

Take up and stop throwing in about local care for children. Worked with the "Children's Houses", they are there so fed, so fed, that every time tears turn to the eyes from the abundance of childhood happiness.

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