bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 47 - ] [14 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65546
 13.06.2012
Work in London

I have a very simple story and when I recall it I get very fun.
Seven years back, I managed to come to England for a 3-month English language course on a student visa.
I think, you understand, a young Russian guy from a poor family, decided to stay here.
I tried to look for a job, but I had a visa without the right to work, so for 2 months of searching I could not find anything.
I did not worry much, lived in a student dormitory, received a high scholarship of £500.
In general, I it.

The easy life is over. The student was polite and the scholarship ended. Then came a big, untouched...a. Well, I did not despair and continued to look for a job, in the internet cafe I was given the phone of Yasha and told that he has great connections, he will help.
I called, answered the “Russian” guy with a strong accent, said that it will definitely help, but warned that it might need money.
I didn’t care, the money was over, and I didn’t want to go home at all. No one was waiting for me there.
I met, I was Yasha, a big, black guy with honest eyes. I agreed that I would be able to work on a car washer for £5 an hour, because I have a weak English for now.
I was in the seventh sky of happiness.
Well, then you know, Yasha, said he didn’t need anything, but the people who arranged needed nothing more than £500, and then he asked me to make a discount, and so they asked for £1500.
I gave the money without thinking, Yasha gave me the address, and also helped buy a ticket for the bus, as the washing machine was 4 hours from London.
I will reduce the details, I came, there is no car washing machine, Yasha does not answer, there is no more money and no one to ask.
Thank God, later everything went well, I have been working for 3 years, I live in a good apartment, I go to the gym.
The story could have ended if it had not been an interesting event that fate pleased me a month ago.

I came after the office, into the hall, changed clothes, broke up, went out to the ring, we had a sparring on Wednesday. A casual sparring partner comes out on the ring.
It is Yasha.

If I am a boxer.
In general, the money came back, and Yasha was slightly sick.

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №65545
 13.06.2012
In the school at the graduation fist and worker fist. The worker won because karate is karate and the hammer is the hammer.

[ + 34 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65544
 13.06.2012
Heat +40 for two months, in the winter - Arctic cold, April - warmer than in Spain, in June - monsoon. We live in a temperate climate.

[ + 40 - ] [18 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65543
 13.06.2012
I moved to a guy. On the first evening, after preparing dinner, I sat down and looked at House 2. The beloved, with a gentle smile, which made me worse for some reason, asked if I had been watching him for a long time. I honestly said three years. Having taken some instrument, he cut off the antenna and said with a laasic voice that I would no longer watch that shit. I didn’t want to argue...In exchange, he arranged to show me cool movies every night, opened up rock for me, taught the basics of programming and became addicted to sports. This is what I am for. Lovely guys! Please do not scream that your girls are TP. You will not find a treasure. Develop their horizons, discover new and interesting. After all, a girl is a clean page on which you can draw your ideal yourself, you only need a little patience. You and the men. Love to you!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №65542
 13.06.2012
She: I feel okay!
She: Not very well.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №65541
 13.06.2012
Zohiko - Ladies: all the men are children!!!! to
Zohiko - THE LORD: first when the little ones give them
KoPraJI (Anton): Then when they grow up, they both ask

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №65540
 13.06.2012
God gave each creature a pair.
The sinful and holy.
The provider gave us a pair.
by Vite...

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №65539
 13.06.2012
I just found a wonderful print:
"It is not clean where they kill, but where they do not defile."
This is really =D

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №65538
 13.06.2012
Commentary on YouTube:

The Samsung Galaxy S II. Then came the Samsung Galaxy S II Skyrocket. Samsung Galaxy S II Skyrocket HD. No, seriously, Samsung needs more imagination...What’s next? Samsung Galaxy S II Skyrocket HD Epic 3D Touch 4G LTE

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №65537
 13.06.2012
XXX (P): Cooking is still a women’s business. I wanted to do a breakdown - I broke the column under the ramstein )))
yyy (D): Well you give it :)
zzz (P2): I am not shouting))
xxx to zzz: ah. Du Hust was just so good.)
ZZZ: Do you have! Hustle...

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №65536
 13.06.2012
Sister yesterday put Mantoux, and yesterday she burned in the sun. Now she is a gremlin: not to urinate, protect from the sun and not to feed after twelve...

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №65535
 13.06.2012
From the Radio Electronics Forum. The fear of mosquitoes.

... and the spark should be very powerful and adjusted to the frequency of the mosquito’s spark, maybe then the mosquito’s wings will resonate and fly away to hell.)

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №65534
 13.06.2012
Don’t animals bother you during sex?
Nersik: My cats love to come to the bedroom during sex. They have a house with shelves in front of the bed. They sit on him and stick carefully. I represent them as directors, and I am a porn actor and actively work for the camera.
Kudeyar: screaming the podi all the time

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №65533
 13.06.2012
I had a barbecue in Milan – documents, tubes, maps, and money – zero. The cards I blocked - and the goats that Sperley sent SMS - squeeze (schiacciarsi). So don't believe - they were offended and when they were taken - I already forgot about it - they had the boldness to file for insult and threat of murder (!) to court. In general, it is half-bad - in Europe and not for that - but the names of the kidnappers pleased me - Kuznetsov and Borisov. and c)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №65532
 13.06.2012
The tape was fun. News: "In the Urals, a pilot with 12 helicopters stole a plane".
According to one of the police version, a group of people could go fishing, and the other - to the bath in the neighboring region.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №65531
 13.06.2012
The Swedes transferred the ball to the Ukrainians.
by V! Towards the Ukrainians!

[ + 23 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65530
 13.06.2012
Just two questions:

To all who are tired of the flood, the heat in the summer and the fierce cold in the winter, who are tired of earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, etc. Come with us to the Kolska Peninsula. Comfortable temperature (+10+15) in summer and warm winter (-10-15). You have no p.

How is the situation with employment and how about speed inets. If well, the entire data center will be transferred there.

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65529
 13.06.2012
The fucking. She killed a mosquito, and the body fell behind the keyboard buttons... Now there is not only a food warehouse, but also a cemetery

[ + 32 - ] [12 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №65528
 13.06.2012
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №65527
 13.06.2012
[0:26:32] sverhoovniz: Cynicism – the reverse side of romance – is given us better))
[0:27:54] Sergei: ah. I can’t imagine what a pearl of soul is.
[28:10] sverhoovniz: and the diamond of the heart?
[0:28:35] Serge: fu ugly you say what)))
[0:29:15] sverhoovniz: It is in you that the pathologist has awakened))) Diamond of the heart, rubin of the liver, chrysolitis of the lungs))))
Sergei: and stones in the kidneys
[0:30:06] sverhoovniz: The Malakhites!

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