bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №150809
 14.08.2018
There was an interesting young man in our class, a second-year-old - Eldar. He made a hole inside the pocket of the pants, pushed his reproductive organ there from the inside and offered the girls to smell something interesting in the pocket. The whistleblower quickly flew through the school. Ella Albertovna, a tough woman, soon arrived at the scene of the accident and, without words, put her hand in Eldar's pocket, but did not pull back. Ladies with many years of pedagogical experience strongly compressed the subject. She dragged him to the end to the head of the educational department. In the mid-1990s, the second-year-old dissolved in time, but there were no relapses.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №150808
 14.08.2018
I make mistakes so well that I only learn from them. Other mistakes are of very low quality.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №150807
 14.08.2018
“And I know what you’re looking for,” said the taxi driver on the way to Vnukovo. “I’ve been driving people to the airport for five years, I recognize that look right away. You are looking for a passport. Turn off the alarm and look into the front pocket.
Oh, here is he! But how do you know...
and five. The flight.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №150806
 14.08.2018
Pete, do you know what a prospect is?
Vasily Ivanovich is good. I have enough explanation for the nuance.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №150805
 14.08.2018
I had three aunts, two dads sisters and one mom. We didn’t love her very much – she was cold, ulcerative, often rude. The fathers were kind, constantly chatting with us, three nephews, constantly saying that they love. But one day, my dad died, and my mom went crazy of sorrow – for a few months she could not recover. Daddy's sisters were constantly coming, talking about something with her, grabbing us sympathetically on the head. My mom’s sister came less often, but she brought us food, cleaned the house, bathed my mom, scratched her.

One day good aunts came and locked up with their mother, as suddenly came a bad aunt, and almost kicked them out of the house. We wanted to rush to their defense, but suddenly our beloved aunts began to curse us, cry out and wish death to our mother. We hated my aunt, but she lived with us for a few months. She never gentled with us, but the house was always clean, there was a hot lunch, my mom took her medications on time. When there were problems in school, my aunt went and got it all right; when I broke my arm, my aunt on her arms ran with me to the injury point.

Later my mother recovered, life re-entered, and a long time later we learned that my sister’s daddy after his death tried to persuade my mother to sign papers to renounce all real estate and assets in their favor, thus leaving us poor without a roof over our heads. Aunt died at the age of 72, without changing her cold temper, but this did not prevent us from constantly saying that we love her and there is no person dearer to us.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna