A colleague yesterday, during the interruption, issued:

“I don’t consider myself a sexist. I would be a sexist if I thought that the place of a woman is in the kitchen. But I don’t think so, because men objectively prepare better than women.”

One day in a sample store where I work, a woman long persuaded her husband to sample another jeans. On the offer also something to look after, she replied, "I have everything, I don't have time to wear! “”

Here is the dialogue between the cabins:

Someone: Man, and where did you find such a woman? There is more there?

Our man from the cabin: no more, I will not give.)

Women: I have a lot of disadvantages, I drink and smoke))

Somebody (admired): So you can even bump! ? )

At school, a math teacher replaced a geographer and asked about the highest mountain on the planet. Everyone is screaming about Everest and it’s with them, and I’m picking up the Olympic peak on Mars. The teacher wanted me to get a pair, but I said I was right, because it was necessary to clarify on which planet! 10 for cleverness and cleverness.

Lunch at work. I ask the new one:

What year will you be born?

by 1997.

I went to school this year!

A man from the neighboring department:

In 1997? I finished school that year and went a long walk.

This was how I first felt old, and immediately realized that it was not quite yet.

Once at a literary lesson, the teacher asked what was the essence of the silent scene at the end of Gogol's play "Revizor". I had a book with excerpts from Gogol's letters to friends, I quickly reviewed them and found one where he wrote about this scene, said, will best show the shock of the heroes, a spectacular ending. And I sounded. The teacher said that this thought only pulls the four. I told my mother at home, they burned. The fourth is the thought of Gogol. On the four...

If the lady opens her mouth, and the man does not get any pleasure from it, then you have to change the entire lady.

sadly
I will be 53 years old in December. Pension under the new law. Since January I fall under the law that those who are 5 years before retirement, those not to be fired.
I was very happy to be able to work for 5 years and pay my bills. Salary is good, conditions are good, a dream, not a job.
Last week my boss called me and announced a reduction.

This is so. And with this new law I may not be able to work now.
I worry.

Soon we will see the first case in history where a prosecutor, a defender, a midfielder and an attacker will appear in court.

A couple of weeks ago I went to the cinema with my kids. We bought tickets 5 minutes before the start, and then they remembered that they hadn't taken anything from food with them, so it turned out that they hadn't eaten since morning. I say to my wife - go to the hall, I'll run to the KFC, I'll buy the little things and coke, I'll come back in a few minutes. I go back with a bag in which there are whistles, in the hands of a couple of large glasses with a collar, and here my way is blocked by a guard. Sorry, but not with your food and drinks. How I begin to get angry. - These are the rules, read here, and point to the tablet on which it is written - you can not bring food and drinks purchased outside the cinema area into the hall. Everything needs to be purchased in a local cafe, where it costs times more expensive.



The security guard explains that there are cameras everywhere and the management monitors this. Hm, and what should I do now? I ask him a question.



“You can put it on this table and take it after the session,” he said. How is it? They will disappear! I’m already preparing to leave them there because the session has begun. And then the guard approaches me and quietly says: you can buy in the neighboring "children's world" package, put your food there and pass, it's not forbidden, nobody sees what's there. I thank him, I go to the “children’s world”, I buy a package, I put my purchases there and I quietly pass by the guard who pretended not to see me. We were the only ones in the room.



Thank you guard!