bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №13389
 02.01.2009
Have you watched Star Wars?
Yes, the episodes

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №13388
 02.01.2009
Bachelor's Rules

Quote should be missed:
- If it starts with the words "Interesting, I am one..."/"Interesting, I am one". No, not of interest. No, you are like millions of others.
- If it starts with the words "Mom today burned out"/"Prepod today burned out". Don’t prepare us for funny things, it’s not a Zadornov concert.
- If instead of it we are coupled with an "unbelievable" case from student/office life. There is a parchment for all of this.
- If it contains the words "kot", "odmin", "shredder", "huyace" or a variation of the emoji "o_O". Fight the readers.
If there is a mother in it. Even if she grew up a dumb ham (in the true biblical sense of the word), it is somehow a pity that he will so calmly shame her.
- If she ends with the words "I should have seen her face". If "should have seen", did you get a quote without a photo?
- If it ends with the words "The whole office". We will somehow mock what you were lying there, your dumb quote in front of us and we can appreciate it ourselves.
- If after the description of any stupidity follows the conclusion "This people is invincible". They win not with stupidity, but with intelligence.
- If after the description of any stupidity follows the conclusion "Only in Russia can". Do not give yourself exclusive to stupidity.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №13387
 02.01.2009
Please please! Let this quote hit the top and it will have a rating in 2009!! All with New Year!

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №13386
 02.01.2009
There are rumors that if a person has a pathological passion for cleanliness (for example, every 5 minutes a cup with chlorine is washed), then he has done something very dirty in his life. So here. I think in my room I am a saint.

[ + 50 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №13385
 02.01.2009
We had a late Ramstein.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №13384
 02.01.2009
... the end:
The office shook a terrible scream:
“Huyas, the cat is gone in the shredder!”! to

... the beginning:
There is a cat in the building. Almost completely white, healthy, lazy. Odmin loves him and feeds him. The shredder broke, carried to Odmin to repair. The shredder is very large, 40 liters. Half of paper. In the meantime while the odmin was forged, the basket was pushed out halfway and the cat went there. and slept. Well, white on white, they didn't notice it, closed it, took the device to the place. Because of the weight of 30 kg, no one noticed an increase of 5 kg. But when the shredder earned, the kitten woke up and said MEU (very loud). Defoe noticed him and...

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №13383
 02.01.2009
IV (00:03:46 31/12/2008)
What do you need to be happy?

Netherlands (00:04:11 31/12/2008)
I want a family, a loving wife, ready to feed my children.

Netherlands (00:04:18 31/12/2008)
Blessed

Pevs (00:04:23 31/12/2008)
Give me children.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №13382
 02.01.2009
Shakherezada said: “Health cannot be bought with money, but it can be bought with money.”

can be lost.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №13381
 02.01.2009
The New Year Christmas.

Estonia is predominantly Lutheran, so Christmas is here

They are celebrated in Western, and Russian speakers also Orthodox. before

Christmas children - both Estonian and Russian-speaking - put on the window

special boots for gifts, and local Christmas boots

An old man (an analogue of Santa Claus), who is accompanied by gnomics, gives

Gnomes are tasked with bringing gifts to children while they are asleep.

The story took place in the early 90s. Children up to 10 years of age believed in

The gnomes. It is now in 4 years to check who brings the gifts. by V

That time with sweets was tight, and with money too, and one mommy.

Because of the lack of tastes, she gave her little son a bowl.

The gnome.

The family woke up in the morning, and the child went to check the shoe.

He walks into the bedroom and cries, “Mom, go see, there’s a dwarf.”

The breath...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №13380
 02.01.2009
The man slapped the girl. He leads home, something fills joy. They go

through the yard to the parade. She is (thinking):

You can walk in a wheelchair and the air is clean.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №13379
 02.01.2009
Loneliness is when half an hour before the New Year, sitting in an empty apartment, you read.

[ + 76 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №13378
 02.01.2009
Even now that my three children have become teenagers, we continue to go to the Calgary Zoo every summer. One of our favourite places in the zoo is the Night House.
There are night animals. Here we are again there. When the door closed behind us, we were in total darkness. Suddenly, I felt somebody’s little pipe grabbed my hand. Not wanting to scare the child, I leaned to him and asked, “Who are you?”

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №13377
 02.01.2009
Nothing burns a man as much as the word "Top" written on his flashbox.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna