Eugene
I am proposing an exchange for TESCHU 1955. Exclusive, the only one in the world.
Compilation of:
The crocodile skin.
front and rear roofs;
Starting from halfway;
Every Ferrari will be jealous.
A volume of 200 liters, but is constantly increasing.
I don't know how many horse powers, I can't measure (the horses are afraid);
Eat everything in a row.
Unbeaten, but painted (so better)

One thing is bad with the landers, they are drunk and swimming in the fountains every year, not in the capital where you would like to see them.

Paint the honeys then.
No, I don’t want honey, it smells somewhat strenuous.
It normally smells like a tree.
Well, imagine, I lie in bed with a guy, with my name and smell of a tree.

Today in front of me was a young dad who carried on his younger son’s arms.
Suddenly the second stumbled and asked for his hands too.
The guy wasn’t confused, he raised them both, a little shuffled, and went on.
So, guys, why do you need to hike and be in shape?
You are the future attraction of your children.

I participate :

Once the requests to post funny things have increased, let’s recall some unsuccessful translations of phrases from books and movies.

— — —
A very popular online game. Some monsters can be caught and used as combat pets. In the form caught, the monster looks like an egg, it is actually called. For example, a turtle egg, a scorpion egg or even a wolf egg. It is half trouble. Now corrected, and before the mob - a deer, I don't know why, was called the "young husband". Very funny looking at the inventory of the "young husband’s eggs".

<shiroginne> I want a Saturday morning and not a Sunday
<pawle> :)
<pawle> yes Saturday was somewhere.

Yellow stickers are not suitable for the recording of urgent cases - after six months they fall away.

Picture of a cat on a tree with a bunch of sausages in its mouth

Why do you kill birds...
When they made sauces, they killed someone too!
z: not a fact )))

Buy a wheelchair, with which you can not enter the entrance without assistance, is five. Again, it is someone else’s fault.
Why are you reproducing?
and----
It would be better if you did not multiply, god. Do you think everyone can afford a nanowheel with space technology? And no one uses wheelchairs from friends and relatives or older children? Do you think when buying, without experience, you can choose a 100% mega-friendly model, and no one is mistaken when choosing simply by ignorance? Do you think there are no entrances and doors you can’t enter even with a super cool crew?

The market sells salmon....on the wall a poster:"Salmon from the Faroe Islands". I glance at it and ask loudly:"Well, where do you have this typical Norwegian salmon from?" :D A man behind the shelves, not blinking:"From Kazakhstan....even a document is available!"

We have a driver working, a woman over 50. She once went to the village with her husband and friends to a bath with vodka and meat. And on the way they met a herd of sheep, without a shepherd. Not thinking for a long time, they grabbed the lamb, drove it into the trunk and went on, dreaming of shells and arguing who would score that lamb. We arrived at the place, opened the luggage compartment and wrecked it, because the lamb was crawling all the way, no, no, it was crawling. Everything was done, from cover to cover, and the animal itself from tail to head. The sheep were thrown out with a pinch under the ass, the car was thrown into the river with the ass and washed all weekends. This is how the thirst of the hollow can ruin the weekend.

ply
What was the shit here if contextual advertising offered hair wholesale?

I go along the market, along the meat line. The seller from a distance begins to seduce me: “Sister, buy meat from the strawberries!” Here is the breast, here is the bacon! Buy it sister! See also! The system is athletic!"

An interesting fact: about 3% of all Antarctic glaciers are made up of frozen penguin urine.

“Look, this package of sausages came out of the conveyor an hour ago in a distant Estonian town. Bats – and it’s already on your shelf!
_________________________
It’s a great cake that travels in time. You can buy it in the supermarket tonight, baked tomorrow morning :)

My neighbors knew Zen. Do repairs in the style of "drunk master" - and let's swell up, and get stuck

[14:40:32] +Cats: The Pitchman
[14:40:44] + Cat: We went for a walk
[14:42:18] Kitty: I approach the house, I see two bodies out of the car, put on berets, get two huge bags with bottles and enter the entrance...
[14:43:29] +Cat: I am approaching my entrance, in front of the car, there are two more such bodies - in berets. They sit, rush and watch me try to pull the wheelchair into the entrance.
[14:44:01] +Cat: A woman came up, came out of the car and ran to me, helped to pull the wheelchair...
[14:44:19] +Cat: these are the "potsreots"

We live in a post-industrial society. If production suddenly fails, sellers will begin to sell snow to the Eskimo, sand to the Arab Sheikhs and air to each other. And a mountain of doubting services to each other. In the meantime, you, dear technicians, will die of hunger. Your age has passed, your century has passed.
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It is difficult to guess that without production there would be no post-industrial society, but any society that is not a cave.

The acquaintance dropped a link to the Akinator. I went in, I guessed "Sysadmin", I answer questions. On the 16th question, this virtually unfinished Freud suggested that I had guessed a perverse exhibitionist. I look at my profession from a new perspective.

Discuss the video, in which various metal objects are burned with high current:

XXX: How much do you pay for electricity?
YYY: Rubies for 5 for the whole video burned :)
xxx: Thank you, I think this piece will pay off if you take the metal figures of deputies, for example, and burn it with a low-voltage switch on order.
Zzzz: And if you take real deputies, you can still earn good money.