The cleaner in the gym, watching how we jump and kick our legs, said loudly - all your karate only to say one day to her son, "and I was able to do this."

I go for my daughter to kindergarten, in the closet she and three boys. My daughter pulls me three balls - jongle. I swallowed them, the daughter joyfully turns to the guys:

This is how my dad can do it!

The first guy:

And mys can do that!

The second guy:

My husband can do that too!!! to

The third shit:

My dad doesn’t know that because he’s not a clown.

96 years old, I am 5 years old, in kindergarten morning. Children with parents are joyful, happy, there are rabbits, and snowmen, and other dressed characters.

And of course Santa! Santa Claus, as usual, was a dressed teacher. Lovely children sat down on her knees, told a poem, or sang a song, received a gift for their efforts and ran away happy.

All this kindness lasted until one of the "snowmen" - the five-year-old I - sat on my knees to Santa Claus) I told the poem, received a gift, and hugged Santa Claus with joy. She hugged, froze, turned to her mom and asked, "Mom, why does Santa have breasts? “”



The mother is punctuated by shame, the rest of the parents from barely constricted laughter, the children are confused. The celebration was successful! :)

Only his mother is waiting for the prince on the white horse.

Benefits of Fundamental Science.

At the Bolsheokhtinsk Cemetery in St. Petersburg there is a tomb with a butterfly wing. When you look at it, you can see that it is actually a tank. And the story will be about how an ordinary entomologist, all his life forging with insects, saved Moscow and Leningrad. The name of the scientist was Boris Švanvič. He spent his entire life studying butterflies, an absolute stupidity, according to the current people. And even then, from the point of view of the dictatorship of the proletariat, this was a real harm, an inadvertent spending of state money. Thank you for not being shot. And when the war began, it suddenly turned out that our cities and the army were completely defenseless against German bombers. The question arose, and how to actually disguise, so that the Germans could not see the same Kremlin or Smolny with the Winter Palace. Titled academics like Fersman could not say anything specific. It was then from hopelessness and pulled out this murky intellectual, washed, fed and ordered to work for the good of the Motherland. He once wrote books about the mimicry and masking of butterflies, let him describe how the masking grid for the Kremlin, the Great Theatre, the Winter Palace, etc. should look. What a guiding thought!! But it worked and literally a week later Boris Nikolaevich had already to Stalin on the layouts how to use the peeling of butterfly wings and the laws of stereomorphism to mask Moscow and Leningrad. In fact, it really saved our cultural values. And then it protected our tanks, our airfields. This is why, literally immediately after the liberation of Leningrad from the blockade in 1944!!! In Leningrad University was organized the department of entomology. And the touching arrival suddenly for everyone turned out to be a knight of the Order of Lenin - the highest order of the USSR.

What am I? Just learned recently that as a result of the optimization of science and education of this department, and others too, there are no more, as are the faculties. Indeed, why do we have the scaly wings of worms, when we need to squeeze oil and gas bubble, to squeeze mani mani mani mani...

and lifhack. After putting sugar in the tea, don’t mix it until you get to your computer. The peel that you make along the way will be sleek and unsweetened, and you can quietly wipe it with your socks.

Xxx: I once returned to Gomel from Surgut, through Moscow, did not calculate the expenses and I did not have enough 5 Russian rubles to travel in the subway. I am still terribly ashamed to remember how I asked people who passed by for these pennies.

Yyy: Yes, in Moscow, when you ask for 5-10 rubles, you get a hundred. I gave myself

Zzz: I was given an apartment in Cheboksaars in Moscow, there was no less, they say.

My grandmother raised me and we lived in a single-room apartment. This is important because the bed was one for two.



And then one evening, in My Family, I heard the word “lesbian.”

Of course, I asked the older generation, “Who are these?” She replied, “These are the women who sleep together.” Naturally, I didn’t know anything about sex, so I didn’t even feel a double bottom in the word “sleep.”



Here is a family celebration. I am proud to stand on a chair to tell a poem and think it is necessary to share such an important event from my childhood life. I say, “I and my lesbian grandmother.”

Everyone is in shock. My aunt is falling out of her hand. My grandmother died in a pre-infarct state.

And I what? Sleeping in the same bed? Everything as said!

After that, we found the opportunity to place a second bed in our room.

My 3-year-old son, when he missed his grandmother, cried and shouted, “I want my grandmother!”  My husband always rejoiced and said, “Oh, the man is growing!”

Every summer I went to my grandmother. We lived in the city ourselves. And the next summer my grandmother came up with what to do with me while she was at work and sent me to the playground to school. The type of summer camp, but without residence - from 10 am to 5 pm. Once in the dining room, they gave apples for lunch, but not whole, but half. I was upset because there were always whole apples in the city. That was what I said to my aunt who gave them. She passed through her teeth something like, “Here and go to your city.”

This affected me. I was sure that my aunt was wrong. The best thing my child’s brain has invented then is to talk to the school director (or suddenly she doesn’t know about this mess). And most surprisingly, it worked! On the same day, we were given half an entire apple, and on the other days we were given only an entire apple. You would see my aunt looking at me.

This is how the 8-year-old won a small victory over injustice.



P.S I have never loved apples.