bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112643
 26.04.2015
My son spends a lot of time at the computer.
My husband accused me of not getting away from the TV.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112642
 26.04.2015
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
YYU: Yes, you are not okay with the punctuation.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112641
 26.04.2015
fff: Here they will ask me:" You probably painted grass in the army?"
FFF: And I would proudly answer: "No. I did not suffer such a hernia. I painted the moss."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112640
 26.04.2015
xxx: I decided to shoot an electric car driver a cigarette and heard him talking to a cleaner, such as about the cancellation of trains. It turned out that they were driving attention... by Yandex electric cars!!! to

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №112639
 26.04.2015
The Pearl Collection:

You are positioning yourself as a sympathy in the forehead.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112638
 26.04.2015
Greek girl: I wanted to send the author in the ass, and he has already been sent. What to do now?

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №112637
 26.04.2015
The goldfish? Thirty-three years, the man could not make the grandmother cuddle, he waited for everything until it was done.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112636
 26.04.2015
Xenia: Favorite grandmother’s game: "Guess why I’m offended by you. And to be even more interesting, I’m not talking to you".

I hate this game. I immediately leave her.

Xenia: I can’t play it. Because I cannot not talk.

by Ugo. Your favorite game: Find out why I’ve offended you, listen to it a hundred times, understand how little you are, how I hate you, and it would be better if we never met.

c) Gurzillla

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №112635
 26.04.2015
From the discussion of protection from outsider forces:
Andrew Mad: By the way, if there are no silver bullets, then you can use false means. For example, include a louder B. Moiseev. The singing of the cock drives out the unclean.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №112634
 26.04.2015
Yes girl, not for nothing. I will pay money. Every year for rubles. Think of yourself. A hundred years is a hundred rubles. You will become rich!

This is from the fairy tale "How pop hired a worker". As practice shows, since then, the principle of the formation of wages in Russia has virtually not changed. and sad.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112633
 26.04.2015
The xxx:
Three lives will take a man.
The xxx:
Chief of Finance Management and their Laboratory
YYYY :
A well-planned financial plan
The xxx:
Because the night is dark and full of hungry students

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №112632
 26.04.2015
It was in Peter on the day of the eclipse. I woke up late that day, and when I went to my business, I couldn’t understand what eclipse everyone was talking about. In the subway after me in the car entered a guy with a girl of both ages about 1-2 course, I hear that they talk about an unknown eclipse again. The girl explains to the guy the reasons for this phenomenon: Panimayaesh, the sun and the moon revolve around our world... I turned around to capture in memory the face of the one who so easily turns in the tombs of Galileo and Copernicus.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112631
 26.04.2015
About the Saturday:
K: As if the current power did not overthrow the Bolsheviks, but they could not give up such a chaos, invented by them.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №112630
 26.04.2015
It is very plausible:
— — —
If you think of something plausible, we have 3 billion this week. "unnecessary" conditional term was given, and you write about 15 years to two minors for a small theft.
— — —
In our country, half the contingent is sitting "for a bag of potatoes" in all strictness, and the second half of the contingent is mashed from some serious punishment for really heavy things. Well, on conditional for 3 yards - there is nothing to say.
The only thing - the author of the book is clearly a supporter of the draconian measures: "for all - death"

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112629
 26.04.2015
It has always been unpleasant when someone insults another out of action, just because they want to. This is this comrade:
—————————————————
The love of English words for illiterate people is a fairy tale.
xxx: Today one employee brought lunch to work, according to his words in "LAUNCH-BOXE". He did not know where the red button was.
—————————————————
It is especially unpleasant if a person tries to show his superiority, that he is said to be literate, and the rest is nothing. It is especially unpleasant if a person makes the same mistakes. The English word launch, which is related to the red button, is pronounced as "panch". Maybe that’s why your employee couldn’t appreciate your humor. Let us be more tolerant with each other.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112628
 26.04.2015
by Tina Anderson:

A typical Peter.
by 14.00
I am cheerful.
What about the waters?
* is
The bar closed at 2 o'clock at night, standing out on the street. Cultural boxes are suitable.
We have a cognac. Take a drink at Mars Field!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №112627
 26.04.2015
I suspect that people are cholling about the preparation of dinner, in the idea of which "to prepare food" is to pour peelings or pasta into boiling water - with those who implicitly assume that there will be five shifts of dishes for lunch and a homemade cake with dust from the heat for dessert.
Approximately the same holiwar was about female figures, where on the hundredth page it turns out that for one athlete "thick" is "three extra kilos on the ballet norm", and for another "abandoned clinical obesity with the threat of a heart attack" - they will not agree, having in mind each of their own.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112626
 26.04.2015
The title of the news "The Chancellor of Germany asked the Foreign Ministry"...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112625
 26.04.2015
Two times removed money from the card in the store for one purchase.

This happened because at the time of the transaction the cashier instead of looking at what she is doing - told a colleague that we have everything in the country this is the way - the country is - we will never be like in normal countries.

Using the opportunity, he told her a lot.

She again applauded.
and c)

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №112624
 26.04.2015
Here Olya also got a new Finnish passport, calls and says: here take your passport.
I went, I took, I said.
Now open it.
Well opened it.
Do you see Loki? is drawn.
I see.
Let go of all the pages! Do you remember how they painted? Give it!
AAAA to AAAA!! I scream – he’s running!! Loos is running!! and 0)))

It turned out to be another degree of security, or as it is called.

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