bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №147680
 27.12.2017
X: As I remember arranged for work, gave a place\comp and something he started to swallow me. Drawing minerals in the intestines, to check what he goes into the rubbish. He noted that the speaker was stuck between the muzzle of the mouth and the body, curating the naked wires about the metal.
Mother of collectors for their handicraft, I begin to consider the systemic, trying to identify the enemies of mankind by it, and I see on his ass a familiar sticker...
It turns out that I collected a few years ago, when I previously worked in the service.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №147679
 27.12.2017
Here you argue about the application of efforts to improve lives... And you consider that everyone has their own thickness of the rod (shaw in the ass) and that the efforts can be completely different?
For a large number of people, talking to a stranger requires tangible effort.
For others, self-limiting yourself in food and losing at least 10-15 kilos is an impossible task.
For the third - to give up on their principles and to adjust a little to society.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №147678
 27.12.2017
xxx: 12 years ago I showed my father the MMO, we still run with him in patins =)

yyy: I showed my father the MMO - two years later my father stopped taking me in paths.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №147677
 27.12.2017
The Universal Material

>> Who needs 300 kinds of building materials when the ordinary red brick replaces everything perfectly?

It is charming!
Well, we built a house, what will we cover? A brick and cover!
I have to choose the walls. The brick will be glued, it will be stylish.
- More pipes and sanitary equipment remained... Oh, yes.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №147676
 27.12.2017
If you disassemble the English word hedgehog into components, you get:
hedge - fence, fence
hog is a pig.
They are strange, the English. What we have a goat, they have a swine.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №147675
 27.12.2017
I will answer about dembels, rolevics and Gypsies.

If the Gypsies attack the cavalry, they will become copeys and the Gypsies will become horsemen.

The rolevics are the same Gypsies, but in armor, and without the bonus of theft. They can attack the Gypsies.

It makes no sense to attack someone. They are good to keep as the guard of the castle.
They cast on slowness and stone skin in 99 moves. When trying to attack them, they impose a curse on the enemy for 99 moves. Then they attack in response three times with a thirst for blood.
I want a game like that.
And robbed the crowns.

To all the good, cats and heroes of sword and magic.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №147674
 27.12.2017
Esthetic

Rolfoster: A small observation from the past corporation. Those who constantly talked about how they love classics and classical concerts are the ones on the question of the host "what do you put?" the loudest of all the orals "Heart!and "

Have you tried to dance drunk under classical music?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №147673
 27.12.2017
I arrived, spent all the oil I could have for a month in two days, filled the refrigerator with perishable foods, and left. In a word, grandmother.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №147672
 27.12.2017

here here :
I, when I go to the forest, always take a fireplace with me ( I do not smoke), a knife ( I went on the berries), a couple of snickers ( I go for 2 hours, a tight lunch). And this is all in the familiar to each bush area. Am I also paranoid?

The fig of you is a paranoid, where the compass, where the cell phone, where the pharmacy, and so on. Exercise yet again.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №147671
 27.12.2017
A: Every time I encounter St. Zorinovka in the text, the idea automatically runs that St. Zomanovka should be nearby.
B: We’ve been joking all our lives. Despite the fact that she is Zorinovka, not Zarinovka.
C: Not far from the Ipritovka.
D: and there is a hooker - wix :)
E: And I wonder why there is a shop of women’s clothes "Zarina", but there is neither Zamani nor Chlorpicrine.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №147670
 27.12.2017
From Beer to Quasic

>> Have you tried dancing drunk under classical music?

There is a version that is how the valse appeared - when trying to keep the shifting focus during dizziness. They stick to each other so as not to fall. Only the trajectories of the valsizing legs already hint...

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №147669
 27.12.2017
It was six years ago in Prague, we and friends celebrated the new year. On December 31, around 11 o’clock, we drove to the center by metro. Our company is international - four Russians, two Ukrainians, Belarusian, Kazakh and Yakut. Who like dressed up for the holiday on the street, and Kazakh and Yakut got the red caps of Santa Claus. They go, they talk, here two Russian-speaking girls approach them, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very much.
Where do you go? ☆☆☆☆
And the boys heard that the girls were talking to each other in Russian, and they answered them in pure Russian:
“Girls, sorry, we can’t, it’s not our hats.
Well plz! One of the girls is talking, not realizing that she is speaking Russian.
Sorry, we can’t, it’s not ours.
Oh well plyiz!
Sorry girl, I do not.
The girls look angrily and depart from the boys, scornfully dropping:
Fuck the Chinese!
So many years have passed, and the Kazakhs and Yakuts in our company are called "Fuck Chinese" =)

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №147668
 27.12.2017
Men in note.
To break up a woman, you have to dress her first.
Women in note.
To divorce a man, you must first get him.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №147667
 27.12.2017
Conversation with husband.
I am in a good mood:
You are so nice, so wonderful, so clever.
My husband is melancholy:
You are smarter.
I am :
Why this?
The husband:
You sit at home and I work.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №147666
 27.12.2017
Soon, the losers who didn’t have time to buy bitcoin will be added to the losers who didn’t have time to sell it.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №147665
 27.12.2017
My five copies.

Does anyone remember the bearded toast about the people who were on the same ship?

And I offer a drink not for health and wealth, but for luck.
Because there were many young, healthy, smart, rich and successful people on the Titanic.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №147664
 27.12.2017
# housekeepers

== "the artist working at home" is not a job, but a ballerina. You are unemployed. Do not ever stumble.

Tolstoy came in. Although the initial post is also provocative - freelancing has long been not uncommon, and what friends are such that are not aware of the realities of homework or at least a free schedule...

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №147663
 27.12.2017
Here I watch all these New Year’s films about alternative Russia, where the heroes fifteen minutes before the battle of the curants put and decorate the tree, straighten the olive tree, run to the store for the butter and green peas, ask for hands and hearts from loved ones, perform fairy stupid feats and fall to sleep in other people’s beds... and I suffer with the question: How? How can you forget to buy a bucket for the New Year? Where is Russia?! to

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №147662
 27.12.2017
What about unequal starting conditions?

Ambedkar Bhim Rao Ramji - from the untouchable caste (1891-1956) - a prominent politician. and religion. He was a famous reformer and critic of Hinduism. He showed himself as an outstanding journalist, publisher, legislator. Member of the council under the Vice-King, Minister of Labor, Minister of Justice. As chairman of the Committee on the Creation of the Constitution of India and author of many articles of this document, A. achieved a legislative ban on inviolability and caste discrimination.
He told terrible stories about his school days: how he had to sit outside the classroom,
separated from other children, or as when he drank, he was ordered to throw off his head and open his mouth so that he could pour water without touching the bottle of his lips. Higher Classes of State Schools
He had no friends, and his teachers ignored him. He plunged into
I read books and studied hard. At the age of 17, the young Ambedkar became the first untouchable person to graduate from the Higher State School in Bombay.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №147661
 27.12.2017
I am in a good mood:

You are so nice, so wonderful, so clever.

My husband is melancholy:

You are smarter.

I am :

Why this?

The husband:

You sit at home and I work.

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