When I got my first child, I became a mother.

When the second child arrived, I became a referee.

How I watch TV.
I turn on the TV, there is advertising.
I switch the channel, there is advertising.
I turn off the TV.

Brotherly

Lips, nose and nose are raspberry colored. Breathed with deep wrinkles - bright blue. A bride of lemon color. The habitated eyes and a fierce, clichy smile complement the resemblance of the face to the painted ritual Nigerian mask. Looking at it from the “facade.”

From the rear, in the eyes of the viewer throws the ass with a short, almost pigish tail. From the root of the tail, the naked skin of the buttocks differs to the sides, changing the color from red-violet to basil.

Mandrill is considered the most colored monkey in the world.

Despite his brutal appearance, Ruslan, so called the hero of this story, is rarely kind, sociable and obedient. And yet, when the outer image and the soul are in sharp contradiction, unforeseen situations happen.

Mandrill lived in a moving Rostov cottage cottage with him from city to city. Every night, after the closure, he was released from the cage to disintegrate. The disciplined monkey common trust and never went outside the office territory.

Only once, in a southern town, where the animal was standing next to the market, the sensitive smell of the beast was delivered to the magic smells of ripe fruits. Probably they acted on Mandrill, like girl fluids and the smell of mommy cakes on the soldier of the first.

And Ruslan died in a selfie.

The market was already closed. Only one late Armenian re-calculated the daily income, concentrating on laying down the bills on the counter. Suddenly someone’s hairy hand lay on the money. The seller shouted angrily and looked up. In a half-meter in front of the horrifying sculpture, then silently crawled through the lips, then revealed huge, sharp like swords, spikes. Ruslan, as he could, showed his friendliness and tolerance. No one could assess it anymore. The Armenian man lay faint under the counter.

Having lost interest in a new acquaintance, the self-guided man filled his baggage bags with little stuff, grabbed paper money and joyfully rushed out to meet the staff of the animal who came out to look for him.

The seller was removed, and the incident became public. The next day, a company of young men in sports costumes approached the cage with Ruslan. They left a box with fruits next to the grid and stood for a long time discussing the appearance of the caretaker. “Brother, look at me. You’re the same when you’re angry.” What is the name of the monkey? How is? Oh I cannot! I have to tell the Russians tomorrow, let the heavy share send.”
Ruslan, sitting in a cage, smiled to people and, as he could, expressed his fraternal attitude to the world around him.

Author Igor Sitnikov

The phrase of Barbara Sergeevna Plush, the governor of the "Diamond Hand" ("and if they don't take - turn off the gas") has acquired a completely new, geopolitical scale.