bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №98545
 28.05.2014
xxx> today is the day of the sashnikov

yyy> and the border guard

xxx> apparently, it is because they guard our border, borders of the homeland, guard, border service, service shepherds, buy cheap military uniform

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №98544
 28.05.2014
My Uncle (What Gates Stole)
When I didn’t joke
I put myself on a netbook.
I could not invent better.
There’s a start button, it’s all known.
What is at work, what is at home
Everything flies, from Word to Chrome.
Windows 7 doesn’t need it.

What a low fraud.
Updated halfway.

Repair the register.
It is sad to add additions.
Take a breath and think about yourself:
When will I take you?

This is what a young programmer thinks.
The soft on the dot-net.
By the will of God I am's
Believing there is no other

Friends of Qi-Ti and Si-Plus!
The nightmare of the crying Hindus
Without preface, the same hour
Meet the youth now.

We will not listen to young people.
Aero to Touch.
My machine, with CNC, will serve
Happy New Year 5!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №98543
 28.05.2014
xxx> guys never talk about their shorts "shorts"
yyy> is it serious?
xxx> well real, I would never say that, I think, and any heterosexual
Yyy> what do you say is cowardly?
xxx> cowards, family members, boxers
xxx> coward - also somewhat vulgar
xxx> I still say "you can remove them yourself if you want"
xxx> has been a long time

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №98542
 28.05.2014
My friend has a dog of the Scottish Terrier breed - small, black and harmful.

I burned my dog. It is :)
A: In the sense? Who did he eat again?
Yesterday I showed myself as a heroic child.I am washing in the bathroom, and there is a night butterfly kicking on me. I eat from a surprise, and he, hearing this, with a whispering "Hold, help is near!" breaks into the bathroom (effectively opening the door with a moustache), and makes a search of the room for harmful personalities. Then I got up on my back legs and looked at me in the bathroom, and suddenly I needed artificial breathing or something else?
I was directly confused. and :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №98541
 28.05.2014
What can you talk about with a person who, listening to Still Loving You, doesn’t catch a whim?
Yyy: But I’m sick of your voice.)
XXX: We continue the conversation ))

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №98540
 28.05.2014
...We will not call you for a test drive, you come to the dates all so dressed and dressed, you build out of yourself a simple deity, and we must immediately buy a cat in a bag. And then, when after the wedding we live with you together, it turns out that this cat does not know how to cook, at home lives Scottish, and generally meant everyone. But somebody bought a standard set of female catches and married this barahlo. It is comfortable.

This is one of the most important things in the world.

To marry after the first date no one forces you, and consider the business of the girl can be for a couple of joint holidays. And you yourself, men, never say "Hello! I like you. Let us meet? I will bring you with my shots and prevent you from breathing not like my mom!" - also come all in white and look in your eyes devoutly, where it comes from then.

[ + 31 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №98539
 28.05.2014
Russian-speaking militias in the Donbass, speaking Russian, are fighting with Russian-speaking Ukrainian soldiers for the right to speak Russian.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №98538
 28.05.2014
Erudited by:

@Me one day on Mail I fell asleep in "Erudit" to play. A competitor with a low rating (and therefore experience in this particular application) is a few words of two or three letters. and my move. I put out a few words of four or five letters, press on "Send". Pops up the message: "The following words have not been found in the dictionary:". Not a short adjective, but a banal "STILL"!
Also removed.

Maybe not so categorical?
In the "Erudite" game, according to the traditions of Russian linguistic games, it is permitted to use only the names of substantive nicknames in the nominal fall of a single number (or multiple, in the absence of the word form of a single number).

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98537
 28.05.2014
From fishki.net
Excerpts from women's forums

My boyfriend wanted to sleep with me. I didn’t like him very much, and I didn’t have another guy. I decided to prevent him from sleeping with me and tossed him hot coffee in one place, but they didn’t bother much.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №98536
 28.05.2014
On the Android forum
By the way, you know who worked on the design.
Volandemort is it?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №98535
 28.05.2014
Well, men have such a feature that they do not see dust and dirt in small amounts.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98534
 28.05.2014
Standing on the balcony - such a feeling that at the entrance the bots from the stalker communicate

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №98533
 28.05.2014
XXX is:
Who is recruiting the militia? I need to go to Slavia.
Please answer who knows.

YYY :
If you have no experience, it is better to register with the National Guard.

XXX is:
Naah has gone.

YYY :
Don’t force the militiamen to tell you the same words. The National Guard is your only opportunity to be at war and cause real damage to the Ukrainian army.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №98532
 28.05.2014
to this:
News: Stas Mikhailov’s concert in Murmansk cancelled due to the absence of spectators
Maxim Sajin: It seems that it is time for Murmansk to be awarded the title of Cultural Capital of Russia.
......................
And we "anchorists" have been injured! They drive with envious regularity, although no one walks on them at all. Harsh people in the north.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98531
 28.05.2014
Alexey: Yesterday, at the Smith concert, we were faced with stupid 17-year-olds and condemned that they were faced with stupid 14-year-olds at the Timberlake concert, and behind us were 40-year-olds and I don’t want to think about what they were discussing.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №98530
 28.05.2014
... aaa: emmm... and I’m only in autumn, at best in Egypt (...

What!! With mortgages and repairs they are still riding on vacation and, S*KA, complaining that blah blah in autumn and blah blah in Egypt?
Go with these problems! 1.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98529
 28.05.2014
Rossiyaninv: Poroshenko is a Jew? What a disappointment. I thought I was the world’s first oligarch.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №98528
 28.05.2014
XXX is
I’ve eaten 3 kg since September.
XXX is
* Recruited
XXX is
But it is not all right 😉 😉

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98527
 28.05.2014
xxx> I want to get drunk with such simple cuddly aunts, only where to get such
yyy> in the houses
yyy> vegetables
yyy> you knock on the window, silently show the bubble, he cries obediently, calls a girlfriend, go for the bar and drink there from the previously used plastic glasses rolling behind the bar.
Well, I don't know, I don't need blueberries, so that you can talk to them about the hard female fate, and that they don't drink shit, but red wine, such as half-sweet.
yyy> then - aunt of flowers!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №98526
 28.05.2014
I am working as an artist, painting a wall in the children's room of the fitness center. In the plot, respectively, the sun, sky, clouds, all sorts of chips and deals are sitting on the grass. Well, and periodically, naturally, all sorts of different snoopers sneak by with the crown question - and this will be something for children?
No, fucking, I’m preparing a stage for the Rammstein concert!

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna