bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №58126
 03.01.2012
Questions from Miley:

Q: How to install Windows 8 SP2 on a tablet home phone?

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58125
 03.01.2012
Corporate, at the table opposite each other are sitting a young lawyer (you - 26 years old) and deputy. Director ( Z - 65 years old )
A: You understand, now is the New Year, celebration, family affairs...
YU: Listen, I understand, you hope for a New Year’s miracle, but you don’t get it!

Half of the office is under the table.

[ + 2 - ] Comment quote №58124
 03.01.2012
Tell me what anime you’re watching and I’ll tell you that you’re wrong with your head.

[ + 58 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58123
 03.01.2012
Dimka: Shas called from home credit. Hz why. Congratulations on the New Year. I asked if it was comfortable for me to talk. I think I’m going to say 'I’m going to be doing a good job'. The man swallowed. I will call back later :D

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58122
 03.01.2012
Nothing makes you feel the proximity of the future like a scream from the toilet "Please dictate me the password from the wifay!".

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №58121
 03.01.2012
I play WoT, a wife is sitting next to me.

I: Look, the French tanks added, you see how round they are?
Just like a croissant :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №58120
 03.01.2012
Do you have a personal list of people you would like to sleep with?
2: the census of population? )))

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №58119
 03.01.2012
When communicating with the girl came to mind the thought that phrases like this:

The Malvinas.
I thought I misunderstood it, and the excuse for this was that you did not forgive me for what happened, and everything else could be because, as I understood, you wanted it because of what you love, and not just because of your instinct, or you only spoke instincts?

...used from the morning after the New Year, you need to be prohibited by law %)

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №58118
 03.01.2012
Discussion on the premiere of the new film
Plohisoft: Where can we see it in the city?
Piranha: Is there anything in the movie?
Plohisoft: No, I’m interested in where in the city there are sofas in front of the house that you can see the TV through the window.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №58117
 03.01.2012
bh> but the most epic ban I’ve earned on online mafia. announced a closed theme game for friends, the theme announced - eggs. I’m a fucking clever man, I picked up my nick. For what was funny, such eggs were not meant and this is a game for cultural people. I mean the Latin word ovo, that is, a bird’s egg, not such an egg.
bh> I didn’t really get along with these cultural people :)

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58116
 03.01.2012
Mother watched the "Let's get married", at the end show who gave the ad or type of such, read the wishes of one: "HIGH BRUNET..." the hysteria came instantly.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №58115
 03.01.2012
From the reply of mayl.ru:
xxx: Give a link to download a completely transparent theme for Windows 7.
YYY: Did you know that a completely transparent topic will be invisible?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №58114
 03.01.2012
Books "How to Become an Effective Manager" and "How not to Become a Fool" are sold in pairs, but, usually, managers read only one of them.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №58113
 03.01.2012
In the chat:
Oh sorry, I have gone.
WOW: What happened at least?
The cat, the cattle, the nail woke up. had to collect.
Zzzz: Then it came quickly.
I am a magnet.
It is genius...
You are the third person to say this to me.
Zzz: Then I was the fourth... I would also gather my fingers...

[ + 40 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58112
 03.01.2012
What can you do with the neighbors that turned on the perforator at 3 a.m. on January 1 at 10 a.m.?? to

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №58111
 03.01.2012
The police police were modernized, modernized, not modernized.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58110
 03.01.2012
BONTON

Twenty years ago I went on a dialectical expedition to the North.
The Urals. We traveled, of course, through the most remote villages.
Here lived mostly Kerch, and they even used the usual "All-Russian" words in an unusual meaning. I will not abuse them here.
The village we stayed in was known for its very high quality beer. Secrets of Generations. There was no more like that anywhere. The refusal to try this drink was considered to be a deadly insult, a deadly sin for the owners, although not all of the expedition (8 people) loved beer, in addition, half consisted of women. But all of us, of course, were at the table, except for the local women – either by tradition or because of the lack of space. They poured somewhere a corner from the bush on the two-liter banks, which were served on the table, and already from them on the half-liter bushes.
Beer turned out to be exceptional – Moscow’s new product, as they say, rests (along with the Czech Republic and Bavaria). My attention was drawn by this episode. There was a couple in our group – Masha and Gene. The rough crack grandfather Egor suddenly struck Genoa – for the fact that the first poured beer to his girlfriend, not to himself. “You respect her,
A beautiful “Love”? And in the meantime, on the surface any sickness can swim - a walnut or a non-man. From the top, you need to pour from the bowl into your bowl, and then pour the girl! Then go into your bowl! We have been doing this in the village for hundreds of years.”
My grandfather’s speech impressed me and somehow unnoticed in my memory.
But 20 years have passed and I get a magazine with advice from a famous French restaurant. So, he thinks it’s wrong to pour wine (especially to the gardens) initially to the ladies.
After all, the top of the bottle can float the remains of a dispersed block and other infections.
I understand that we have traveled around Europe in bonton for about half a thousand years.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №58109
 03.01.2012
Which race is coolest in Starcraft?
Tagged: Koreans

[ + 68 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58108
 03.01.2012
Have you watched Medvedev’s New Year’s address?
and no. To whom did he turn?

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №58107
 03.01.2012
Tagged with: hello
Yea: Ku
Q: What is Q?
Yea: Do I need it?
Tagged: to talk
Go find yourself a peer.
Go to Fuck! I love adults and I love adults!!! I am dating a 16-year-old.

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