bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №57305
 08.12.2011
urgently! As a result of a fire in Moscow, the head of the Central Committee received burns of 140% of the body! and :)
According to other data, the burn amounted to 146% ;)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №57304
 08.12.2011
Explain where do the grandmothers hide their idiotism before the wedding?

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №57303
 08.12.2011
I watched Discovery, I liked the phrase:
When the construction of the pyramid was completed, the Egyptians put it on the top.
The golden cap. Later, someone removed the caps. And nobody knows why...

[ + 52 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №57302
 08.12.2011
Barack Obama calls Medvedev and complains that there is a high probability that his Democratic Party will lose the congressional elections
The United States.

Medvedev said: “Figny! I will help you. I have a mega-special on elections, Churov his name.
He will come to you and everything will be fine.”

Elections in the United States have passed.

Medvedev calls Obama to find out.

Obama said: “Let’s all go quietly. Only here the result is strange some - in all the states with a large gap won
“United Russia”

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №57301
 08.12.2011
Why do you say I am stupid? The fact that you are seven years older than me doesn’t mean that I’m stupider... when I’m 29, and you’re 65, then we’ll see who’s stupid.

[ + 91 - ] Comment quote №57300
 08.12.2011
Plus in the news:
Churov said that all the videos about electoral falsification posted on the network are imitation. They simulated the work of the polling station, mimicked a bunch of violations and placed on the network.
In my opinion, the Churov Prize for the imitation of brain work is provided.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №57299
 08.12.2011
xxx: no, you don't understand, if I put grabbles, I won't attack them easily, I'm stationing on them

[ + 43 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №57298
 08.12.2011
Olga beats the omon with a dude
He screams for what.
I went to the store for bread.
Not to put power on the square.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №57297
 08.12.2011
> New Orleans Police deported from a tent camp members of the Occupy Wall Street movement". About two hundred police officers were involved in the eviction of the protesters.

The U.S. has expressed concern about violations of democracy and human rights in Russia.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №57296
 08.12.2011
As my smoking friend said, “Someone calls me a chicken, some smoking. And my mother gently - smoking"

[ + 54 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №57295
 08.12.2011
Discuss the strange behavior of the girl
First I sent three letters, then I looked at her and she looked at me and smiled!
Per she imagined you dead?

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №57294
 08.12.2011
He tried to cause positive emotions in people, and caused panic, police and Satan.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №57293
 08.12.2011
About the entry of troops into the center of Moscow on 6 December:
Are you there, the tanks are driving?
Duke: Yeah fuck, just preparing for May 9th
I am born ?

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №57292
 08.12.2011
Anime is not an anime! Angry *
XXX: And in general, you can think like you’ve never looked at it.
YYY: is hentai considered?
xxx is?! to
You told me you don’t watch porn.
Yyy: anime is not cartoon - hentai is not porn...

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №57291
 08.12.2011
What is "Legitimacy"?
Nothing, sunshine, you have heard

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №57290
 08.12.2011
The Female Logic:

We wander around the shopping center, she is hysterical - "and suddenly I buy, and I will not like it later".

I say, so choose the things you like first, and only then buy them.

She looked at me astonished, and thought for ten minutes, but she did not answer anything :)

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №57289
 08.12.2011
DarthSim @ HabraHaber:
The Russian Post does not provide...

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №57288
 08.12.2011
>>> a bed with a vibration device for simulating movement in a train

Honestly, if there were also a sound accompaniment (without passengers, only the external mechanical sounds of the train movement), and with a "stop" when you need to wake up - I would buy.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №57287
 08.12.2011
Call from the client:
I broke my ass before I called you.
Response of Operator:
Do you want me to kiss you? :)

[ + 60 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №57286
 08.12.2011
Where to get the number 31? Happy sent a letter.
"Please urgently send out the cash book for 31.11.2011. andquot;

UncleSAM: Dear friends (who sent it to you there)!

In connection with the recognition of legitimacy in the territory of the Russian Federation by the Decree of the Council of Workers and Peasants Deputies No. 128 of February 14, 1918 of the Gregorian Calendar, developed by the bulla of Pope Gregory XIII
On February 24, 1582, in November, the month of each year is possible only 30 calendar days.For the above reason, send a sheet of the cash book for November 31, 2011. We do not think it is possible.

With respect, Signature / decoding of signature / date (31.11.2011)

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna