bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 68 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56044
 06.11.2011
I go home, curling in the courtyard, and I find the following picture: a tall goblin, clearly drunk, with a friend and girlfriend makes a gesture to a bad guy in a black coat passing by. Further, everything is like in a bad movie - the guy stood for seconds three, turned around and ran to the already departing stuntman and answered him a pinch. Gopnik in confusion unfolds (like who is so brave here) and with easy surprise sees how the guy gets out of under the coat of the sword!!!!! to
This is how you remember the brown jokes about hippies.
P.S It all ended banally, the hopper got a sword at the horns, the boy quietly went to the other side.

[ + 52 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56043
 06.11.2011
A month ago, a daughter was born, they named Yaroslav. A short glory. The whole family mocked, about the fact that they called the girl a male name.A month later, a sister is born. His name was Vasilis. Shortly by Vasya.
Now we are glorified and worshipped. The two sisters. They are not lucky for their husbands. What is your girlfriend’s name? by Vasia!! to

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №56042
 06.11.2011
Walked with the dog. Two 12-year-old boys on a bicycle. Fragment from their conversation:

You do not understand! Nobody "Jaguar" drinks from the bottom! No one drinks anything, you know?
Why is?
Because it is damaging!

Laughed in the voice.

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №56041
 06.11.2011


Have you ever had a young man?
YYY: Emmm... considering that I’m 25 years old... I’m not even sure what to answer to you.
XXX as is)
YYY: Of course not! I was raised in a monastery, where I was watched by 2-3 monks every minute! And the carrots were given to me only in the shredded form! I have only seen men on icons.
XXX: Are you serious?
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №56040
 06.11.2011
"To read the terms of the license, click I have read and accept the terms..."

by Cisco

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №56039
 06.11.2011
- Marishka (01:28:46 6/11/2011)
It’s all in my photos, right?

- Mister Arsi (01:30:12 6/11/2011)
Not all yet)
I have a big hard, so let’s not stop.

- Marika (01:30:58 6/11/2011)
ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

[ + 61 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56038
 06.11.2011
A bowl washed with hot water: = clean bowl;

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №56037
 06.11.2011
Polundra: I live in Peter, and my grandfather and grandmother live in Lithuania. In the summer, it was good to teach the grandfather to use the computer in general and Internet resources and Skype in particular. (For reference - 70 years of character history). It calls here in the evening on the city's ordinary human phone, with a fallen voice reports that the computer is dead.
Polundra: Well we are there with the Soviets, call the master sweet grandfather, don't be sad. They called the master, Lithuanian-razlitovsky.
Polundra: but even he is medium, in what is salt. Daddy caught a virus while walking around websites with naked girls!
Then he joyfully justified with a murderous comment. "No, well what you wanted, my grandmother is no longer that, not that..."

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №56036
 06.11.2011
The correct question is, “How do you feel about marriage before sex?” and not vice versa.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №56035
 06.11.2011
I am conducting a sociological survey.
What associations do you have with the word brand?
Tagged: brand pin

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №56034
 06.11.2011
From the explanation of the accident (748 certificate) literally:
I, a dumb blonde on Mazda, turned where I wanted, and caused an accident.
According to the inspector GIBDD FIO, it is written correctly!

[ + 63 - ] [5 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56033
 06.11.2011
I look at a torrent list of pires: a Japanese, an American, an Australian, a German, a flag that I see for the first time in my life. And all the customers have 3.0, and I have 2.2.1... something embarrassed. I thought, who of them will now look at me in the list of pires, see the Russian flag, look at the version of the client and think of the “retarded Russians.” I turned off torrent, jumped, reinstalled. I’m happy to go on, isn’t it an idiot? >_<"

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №56032
 06.11.2011
I was in the elevator at the shopping center today.
- and my one: "What a strange place for the piano"
You won’t believe how many people started looking around looking for the piano in the elevator.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №56031
 06.11.2011
In the morning I go and go through the store a bunch of clearly cuddling men, I hear a conversation from the edge of my ear:
Fuck it, I will die!
Don’t think about dying, Monday’s salary!! to

[ + 103 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56030
 06.11.2011
1: - yesterday sent a sms to friends "I can't find my phone, call him. Sps." Almost everybody has called. I think I don’t have the smartest friends :(
2: Did you find the phone?
This confirms my theory :(

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №56029
 06.11.2011
Comments to Photo
Tagged with: drunkard
Go to Go to Go! Be more tolerant!
Zzzz: gay underground, okda?

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №56028
 06.11.2011
Yulia
all who put points at the end of the sentence are dissatisfied with something in their personal life))
Evgeny
Anyone who puts points at the end of a sentence respects grammar. = is

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №56027
 06.11.2011
ZY Manager Misha, if the car doesn’t arrive at the time, I’ll break your site.
With respect, LLC “Safety Standard” Nikitin E.V.

What did they come? It intrigued!

[ + 57 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56026
 06.11.2011
Comments Off on Himki Stadium. A beautiful green grass. Thanks to computer schedule.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №56025
 06.11.2011
The famous singer and composer is no longer
This is the first time that such
The situation. In January last year
Yuri Antonov
Meeting with Inspector GIBD. Yuri
Anthony saw it as an insult.
The name of the presented
His name was Alexander Navrot.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna