The paradox of homosexuals is that they cannot reproduce, but they are becoming more and more every year.

Seven quarters
It is said that in the Grand Theatre, one soloist, possessing from nature a large bass, but having serious problems with musical hearing, could not cope with the arias of Varlam in the opera of Musorgsky "Boris Godunov".
There between the lines of the text sounds orchestral music, literally like this:
“As in the city was in Kazan!” Two or three or four or five or six or seven. – is
He plays an orchestra.
“The terrible king had to have fun!” The orchestra again:
one two three four five six seven.) is
“He beat the Tatars unhappy...” – well, and so on.
Here in these seven quarters and could not get the unfortunate bass: then sooner will begin, then later.
The conductor threatened him: "You are lying again - and I'm snooping off the role!“”
Bas ran to a friend of the concertmaster.
“Help me,” he said, “think something.”
And he grumbled:
This place has been rehearsed hundreds of times. How wise you are!
Okay, let us do so. You have to sing something about yourself.
A phrase that would exactly fit into those seven quarters. Well here though.
He said, “I am a man!“”
I have tried:
“As in the city was in Kazan!” Kaka-Kai is Kaka-Kaka!) is
“The terrible king had to have fun!” Kaka-Kai is Kaka-Kaka!) is
“He is a Tatar...”
Greatly succeeded! Once ten propels, and bass, proud and all-armed, went to the show.
He came to the unlucky aria, sang the first line, sang about himself an inappropriate phrase, confidently began: "The Terrible King..." - the conductor with angry eyes points his finger: again, the parasite, entered a quarter earlier. The next line of Arias is the same. In a word, it was quite good: I finished singing - the orchestra is still playing.
Leaving the scene, shouting, “I will kill!” I went looking for a concertmaster. He put his hands apart:
I have been rehearsing ten times. Again, how did you sing?
- As in the city was in Kazan, - began to bend the fingers bas, -
Khao Khao Khao Khao!

If the government cares about the poor, it needs to be changed.
With a good government, there should be no poor.

xxx: true, today the clock was stolen, the fucks :( will be returned only in October...
YYY: not returned
There will be no more clock shifts.
Medvedev cancelled
XXX is what? The fucking...
Everyone would get rid of them.
YYYY: Yes
Babla is not enough, the space is almost all scattered.
Now is the time to go.

My longest relationship lasted eleven days. And then she got tired."

The series "The White Collar"

The real story:

Recently, my wife and I went into the elevator, and with us, Mommy and her son, five years old. From the frost, all frozen and red. He looks at himself in the mirror and says to his mother:
“Mom, look, my cheeks are like apples, red!

Well, my wife and I look so pleasantly, say, how beautifully he says, and he continues:

Here are my lips. and. and. Like a corpse. and. and. The Blue. and. and.

Gissen

A large sports store. Question of a lightweight girl (d) to a consultant (k)
Q: Tell me, and why these skies are so wide and all different
Q: Probably because you don’t need to look for skies in the snowboard department.

Have you noticed that the knives have become sharper?
I (wishing to make him pleasant, although I have not even used my knives yet): of course, thank you
Man: No... I didn’t take them.
I looked so badly.
With good intentions...

My friend works in furniture. He tells us:
An employee of the hall approaches and reports that on the sofa in the department is soft, sleeping some man. Well, he is there, really sleeping, until the snoring stands. Well he wakes him up and says he’s sleeping, yeah.
He stared at him, then onto the couch for 75 boxers and said, Ohye...your couch...I take.

ууу:I remembered how we moved - in the new house, the crossroads, the shovel under 15 degrees, we walk in jeans, hooks and shoes. Father went to the old house waiting for the new owners - keys and docks to give and in the kitchen on the floor cut off, as warm, native, quiet and cozy :)

14:59 NATO soldiers seized almost half a ton of heroin in Afghanistan
15:57 Afghan Taliban robbed a column of food for NATO soldiers

You can see who needs

The State Duma, despite the protests of scientists and experts, with the help of the parliamentary majority of United Russia ratified the treaty on the transfer of the Barents Sea sector to Norway.

One of the comments:
Can we declare war on Norway?
and quickly surrender to captivity.
I want to live humanly in a normal country.

There is something in it...

The bullets moved for an hour.
vanity on the globe.
X was in bed.
Now on the bus.
and c)
I don’t know whose, but how true.

The human nature is complicated, but predictable: first you want to eat dumb, and then die from the dull gray of life.

At the doctor’s reception:

X: Is there anything that disturbs you?
YYY: The Military Command! and :)

Sitting specifically looked at the clock on the comp, 1.59 and 3.00, oh time flies

Xxx: Girlfriend Playing Sims 3
xxx: and there the zodiac sign is selected automatically, depending on the chosen character
xxx: when children are born, the character and, accordingly, the sign of the zodiac are random
xxx: so here, she was born twins - a shooter and a waterlord
The birth is so lengthy...

I can open a bottle of beer with twenty parts of the body, although I could once open thirty-two!
I know how long you’ve gotten teeth out 😉

My mom loves the series “She wrote a murder” and re-visits it every day after work. Once again, coming from work, she inserted a scratched disk into the drive and turned on another series. After the dictionary's phrase "She wrote a murder", the grandfather whispered from the kitchen into the whole throat - "When will she write a suicide!!!" The curtain.

At the age of 16, I was left home alone for the first time. Afternoon, I looked at the pile. Shortly after the onset of darkness, a wild feeling of fear came about. I decided to sit down until I was half-blind. She sat down, fell into the bed, halfway into the dream world, her nose was wildly chested and sneezed so that the bed was thrown. Actually nothing, if in this outlying darkness because of the wall did not spread the evil-sleeping "Be healthy".

Uumas: Red Pirate, I call my genitals this.
Redcorsair: You are lulling yourself
UUMAS: It’s you letting yourself! When was the last time you took the Pink Lagoon for an abortion?
SINtez74: UUMAS, paththalome))))))))