bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 80 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26808
 04.03.2010
I took my sperm for analysis to the local laboratory.
So they gave me a bowl, they called the office_I will go... I think it is time to start a friend to crack, and some fool apparently clung to me... short instead of porn magazines lies "Behind the wheel")
I'm off, but I didn't get confused with the BMW X5.

[ + 126 - ] Comment quote №26807
 04.03.2010
to this:
Vacation is when you find a bottle of champagne in the refrigerator in the morning, you think - and why not!
= = = is = is = is = is = is = is = is = is
Oh yeah yeah!!!and 😉 😉

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №26806
 04.03.2010
I stand with my mother in the store, she buys, I wait. She makes purchases in her bag, and the next person, a man of uncertain age and obviously with mental disorders, asks the seller:
I have a kilo of potatoes.
There are no potatoes.
The name of the vodka.
Mother on the side:
Look how disappointed you are.

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №26805
 04.03.2010
Again the blonde.
Recently tried fried lamb eggs (but if you cook properly not bad at all) and shared the impressions with a friend. This corresponds to his girlfriend. The dialogue:
You can imagine what the wolf ate?? to
She : What?
He is: the lamb eggs!
She: What are they carrying?! O_O

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №26804
 04.03.2010
I am collecting collection models...Give "Kamaz".
Everything is like the present - even the cardigan immediately fell away!

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №26803
 04.03.2010
to this:

The man in the black car, respect to you! I saw how you stopped today at the intersection when you went out on the road, went out by turning on the emergency signal and helped grandmother to get through the slippery straw on the sidewalk, behind you stood another 2 cars and they hid all of you material to meet their rod and nail, and you real respect, grandmother was in shock for another 2 minutes and broke on...

This country begins to change... where to look...
___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

I thought to write it or not, but when I saw this quote, I decided. Yesterday, I am leaving the house, walking 50 meters, I bowed to scratch the jeans (from the timberlands coming out constantly) as I see in the darkness, the lights of the car standing in front of me turned on, when I was straight, they went out. The driver of the journey thought I chose something, and decided to light up)
Something is wrong with our country...

Sash

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26802
 04.03.2010
I have a Chinese phone on my phone. Therefore, the alarm offers options: Stop and Lie down.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №26801
 04.03.2010
If a person spends more than 2 hours a day sitting in a classroom, his life has failed.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №26800
 04.03.2010
The Red Army is out.
I saw with my own eyes!
At work, you have to face computers supplied to the troops by some organization on a daily basis. These machines usually have one of the many varieties of Linux pre-installed.
The system is very much simplified, and so russified.
(militarized) that the CHANGE button in the dialog box is called
Leave it up!! to

The first time I was crying. The Captain

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №26799
 04.03.2010
During the next session of the State Duma, two armed bandits broke into the session hall. They apologized for the delay and took their seats.

[ + 131 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26798
 04.03.2010
to this:
Abyss you are doing miracles, I need a miracle of your collective mind very urgently! I am, of course, not an angel, but there are a few like me, a virgin at 21 all my life helping others and not asking for help and support in response. I am sick, very much, and I am getting worse. What is difficult to understand with me, I think and doctors in our republic will not be able to, but I can’t eat almost anything, the body does not take any foods, I get worse day by day. Please Collective Mind help me! Let me be cured, I don't want to die, I promise not just to live, but to appreciate every second and to enjoy every day, all the rest I will myself, just wish me to be cured! I want to eat and not pay for hellish pain, wish me this! Make a gift for March 8th

Leave an electronic contact.
Bring to the best, I want to try to help.

[ + 76 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26797
 04.03.2010
8 What will you give to your wife?
I will prepare dinner with my own hands.
Eat at least humanly.

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №26796
 04.03.2010
come to the photographer and say:"make me an avatar on the passport"-it’s too much.. o_0

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №26795
 04.03.2010
The xxx:
Wow the cat.

Hands of Hands:
He is not high yet.

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №26794
 04.03.2010
Every day I go to the universe by metro (St. Petersburg). I recently heard a strange advertisement on the escalator. I don’t take it literally, but still:
Your money will come back from where no one has ever returned. From the Internet..."
Imho, very vital

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №26793
 04.03.2010
The first time I had sex was at 16 after graduation)))
Q: Did he marry you?
I remember what it is 😉

[ + 96 - ] Comment quote №26792
 04.03.2010
Going into the bathroom in trousers and socks, I proved to my mom that I was sober.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №26791
 04.03.2010
News about the introduction to the technical institute of the MIFI specialty "theology", one of the comments:
"Olo’s technocracy attack"

[ + 201 - ] [14 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №26790
 04.03.2010
Abyss you are doing miracles, I need a miracle of your collective mind very urgently! I am, of course, not an angel, but there are a few like me, a virgin at 21 all my life helping others and not asking for help and support in response. I am sick, very much, and I am getting worse. What is difficult to understand with me, I think and doctors in our republic will not be able to, but I can’t eat almost anything, the body does not take any foods, I get worse day by day. Please Collective Mind help me! Let me be cured, I don't want to die, I promise not just to live, but to appreciate every second and to enjoy every day, all the rest I will myself, just wish me to be cured! I want to eat and not pay for hellish pain, wish me this! Make a gift for March 8th

[ + 85 - ] Comment quote №26789
 04.03.2010
to this

This is how you buy a car when you were a child, and then you jump off and buy yourself Coca-Cola.



Fuck, I bought a guitar, and recently...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna