A delegation of Ukrainian IT men travels to Finland by bus. The road is not close, to go long. One person in all this time has never gone to shit, a bus without a sorting, where-in any case the shit breaks, well he kept this matter to himself until Finland itself. We finally arrived, the settlement. The man as soon as he can crashes, sits on the toilet and rolls a particular bunch of shit that has accumulated for all this time. Press the wash button - screw, press again - does not work. Well, hole, like a normal hotel, and the laundry does not work. In the middle of the bathroom there is a huge bunch of stinking shit. The guy falls into the hallway, sees a aunt from the service staff, and tensing his brains includes a modest vocabulary of school English:
– Miss... Com... – calls the appropriate gesture... – Com...
He takes his aunt to the bathroom and says:
and LUCK!! - points to a huge bunch of shit and presses the slide button... slide works!!! to

We cannot expect mercy from nature; it itself expects mercy from us.

One of my sons is daughter:
The cat has a lot of wealth, and you, Katya, have a few shortcomings.
You are not white, you are not furry, and your ears do not turn.

The Dargaiah Ridaccy!
(From letters to the newspaper in the section "Sexologist Advice")

Interrupted sexual intercourse is always bad, especially when it is interrupted by the arrival of a husband.

“It happened that during our love game a leg was broken on the couch. I fell right on her cat, who, frankly, was cruel to me.”

“I persuaded her all night, and when I persuaded, I dropped everything and ran to work.”

“We decided to make love like we did in the movie 9.5 Weeks. I split up, and he anointed me with strawberries and began to sliced meat from my body. Everything was blessed well. In the evening he was caught by diarrhea from unwashed berries.

"Arthem began to gently smooth my hands, as if looking for a weapon."

“I came with a large bouquet of roses and kept silent all night. I was crying alone all night. “Is it a cowboy, just a big dog?”

“Once in 1975, my husband brought home a condom. I was afraid of him like a mouse or a rat. My husband was more experienced before marriage, he insisted on protection and, when he entered me with this Soviet condom, he took a selfie there and stayed there. And we, forgive me, tried to get the spoon for an hour.”

“The army made me a man, even though I didn’t want it.”

“I confessed to my wife that I had a passion for Mila, but I didn’t sleep with her. So she arranged for me that I’d better sleep.”

“On my first date at the age of 15, I took ten condoms. And all of them were useful: We filled them with water and threw them out of the lodge to the passers.

“When we sat at the table, I was between two Valers. They told me to make a wish. I guessed, but it was not my wish, but theirs."

"She said that she went to the country with her mother, and returned all in the meadows.
“Strange,” I say, “you have a relationship with your mother.”

<edd> pct. The cat ate cellophane again. Sitting with such funny brikets... cats in envelope... need to be patented...>_<

"...how to watch the smsks and made calls, and I know for sure that he’s crawling with his fools from work!! I can’t catch him now!! to
Help me! What to do???and "
____________________________

On that day, Stirlitz was closer than ever to failure.

After a long dispute, we came to the coitus.

Kirill SheLLest:
I stand early in the morning on Saturday at 7 a.m. at the tram stop, well, the people are all, a man five.The button comes - a boy 7-8 years old and waiting for the tram, like everybody.One of the grandmothers, the most heart-hearted, approaches the baby and asks in a deliberate tone:"Where are you grandson so early then you wait?!"To what she"innocent"tone of a sea wolf:"To school, babylon...to school..."

CherryPah has joined #******-techsupport
<CherryPah> Hey, is there anyone alive?
<xxx> hello
<yyy> Do you have a question?
<CherryPah> Guys, I love you
<xxx> thank you very much ?
<CherryPah> I love it so much that I would fuck you all for such a crazy tech support

Reporting an error
Remember in technical support.
All employees own
Telepathy for the Five
Details of Errors
Do not know completely.
Let them guess themselves.
What happened to you
The program informs you.
What suddenly happened wrong?
He writes a lot.
Other incomprehensible words?
Appealing to Tech Support
He says “writing something.”
Do not add the full text
No one needs him.
Do not write to technical support.
What did you do with the program?
Before it ended
A terrible trouble with you.
What are the buttons
What was introduced and where
Why know technical support?
How to repeat the mistake?
Of course, all in the world.
As one without exception.
They use the same
Browsers like you.
Even the program version
Same for everyone
Technical support
They know her better than you.

From the forum:

It’s terrible, there’s no smiley like that.

Have you ever done a girl’s cunnilingus?
VelKro: No, only the Cunivids...

The xxx:
I bought a chicken instead of a peel.

The xxx:
What to do with her?

I came home today, went to the kitchen and I see that the dishes are dirty full, well I think I will help my mom, I will wash. About an hour washed, washed everything and with a sense of duty done went to shudder.
My mother woke me up with the screams "Sasha!

watched today with his brother the match Russia - Liechtenstein, in the second half of the replacement of V. Berezutsky with A. Berezutsky, looked at the brother on this case and said that they were fools to spend the replacement? During the break in the dressing room, Mike would be changed, and this is the whole replacement...

The news:
"The body of Chupacabra was found in Texas"
Wait until the unknown body is found.

Vasilisa
I got tired from work! 20 children in 6 hours

Alomorf
0 - O

Alomorf
I’m even afraid to ask...who are you working for?

Vasilisa
I am an animator.

Alomorf
The fucking! Why do you sometimes start talking to someone like kids?

Vasilisa
You got to the point! D. Sometimes I get hurt.

Alomorf
I have a friend, she’s a dog.

Alomorf
So she often says to me with such a stretch: ma-a-aladez

Alomorf
I liked it, and then I heard her telling the dogs.

Alomorf
The worst thing is that she gives them sugar, but I don’t.

You even hanged your clothes in a different way, you didn’t fold the cloth halfway! - Oh mom, there was enough space, it would dry sooner, the area was bigger. Leave your physical stuff to the school.and "

It is strange! I am one of those generations for whom the radiation icon means not Duke Nukem or Stalker, but, singing, radiation!

We have fun. I try to play something of raw metal on the acoustic, the younger brother in turn tries to repeat this after me on the battlefield.