bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №14605
 19.02.2009
People, explain, please, if you are putting on the phone call dubble calls (like children’s voices, stupid phrases, etc.).And then when you are called in a public place, you are in angry convulsions trying to pull out the phone faster and answer so that no one hears this nonsense?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №14604
 19.02.2009
Sooner or later you will get married. A good man or

Condoms are bad.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №14603
 19.02.2009
Three facts – one positive, the second negative, the third terrible.

Together, there is a very black humor.

1st Muzzammil Hassan founded a television station in New York.

Overcoming negative stereotypes about followers of Islam.

Good thing, necessary, because there are such stereotypes.

2nd His wife, with whom he has two children 4 and 6 years old, complained to the police

For acts of violence by the spouse and filed for divorce.

Three He cut off her head.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №14602
 19.02.2009
Yesterday in the news heard that Lužkov proposed to take away the property from

The oligarchs. Probably argued with his wife.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №14601
 19.02.2009
K to:
" From the forum:
I work in the universe. The only color printer ES-no is with me (well engineer though ;-) )
A teacher (a grandmother-historic) arrives, asking to print on a color printer, large, the name of the newspaper "Russia of our days". It is printed in the colors of the Russian tricolor. When I said that it’t work, I started screaming and quarrelling.
Okay, figured with her, to argue with herself is more expensive. Printed on 3 pages:
"Russia and Russia"
"Our" is blue.
"The day" is red.
The grandmother went to complain to the rector that I was sabotaging my job and brought her a clean sheet. Get rid of this work..."

It is right, fucking! Get rid of! Is it a guy who doesn’t know about the contours?

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №14600
 19.02.2009
Conversation of 2 friends (p1) and (p2)
p1 in the innet for virginity a quarter of a million backs given
P2 I stepped down.

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №14599
 19.02.2009
It is when in the abyss you read only short quotes.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №14598
 19.02.2009
Only in Siberia can you find a red black.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №14597
 19.02.2009
Where is the dollar going now?
FANTOM: The dollar is going to the ass, but on the road is constantly jumping!

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №14596
 18.02.2009
I bought a cooking costume. The girl said we were going to play a role-playing game: I was going to be in a chef costume and she was going to be in a turkey costume. And I’ll cook it...
c) Nigmat

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №14595
 18.02.2009
Oh, youth... There was a time when I was explaining to my son why the Mermaid and the Terminator are talking in one voice!

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №14594
 18.02.2009
and Anchay:
I read the news on Yandex over the last few days:
1st The French Defense Ministry confirmed on Monday the collision of French and British nuclear submarines in the Atlantic Ocean.
2nd Two passenger trains collided in the Czech Republic.
Three On February 11, two satellites collided over Siberia for the first time.
On the 14th of February, the two find each other.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №14593
 18.02.2009
My 3 year old son is in the bus. A grandfather standing next to the child begins a conversation:
Where are we going with my mom?
To my grandfather.
What are you and your grandfather going to do?
Drink the vodka!
There is no scene, the laughter of my mother. Everyone around me had to explain that they were just going to paint the boat to grandfather.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №14592
 18.02.2009
<chrome> how these shoes with wheels are called
<chrome> type of rollers
<chrome> wheels are removed and you can walk
<Spring> and Spring>

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №14591
 18.02.2009
We start gymnastics for those who read Bach.

The minimum program:
Straighten the back.
Remove the hand from the beard.
I closed my eyes for 5 seconds.

The optimum program:
They stood up, stood up, and made a couple of easy fastenings.

The maximum program:
- Press the cross in the upper right corner and push to work-sleep-eat-have sex-feed a cat-walk a dog-prepare for the exam (need to emphasize)

Do not eat at the table!! to

P.S Thank you very much to the one who first wrote about the left hand on the beard! Your contribution to the health of the nation is invaluable, friend!

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №14590
 18.02.2009
<Loki iv Kusto>Today was on medical examination in the military department. (D) the dermatovenerologist is hot=)
Are there complaints on the skin?
I do not.
Did the girls have sexual contacts?
I was.
D is protected?
and yes.
D Why?

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №14589
 18.02.2009
xxx: what is "Nastja is typing" in the window, and nothing appears?
YYYY: Well... how... Nastia is stupid ;)

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №14588
 18.02.2009
The companion was in the army, the combat gave them the task to the clerk to peel the branches on the trees to a height of two meters, well, the clerk said to the deputy, the deputy gathered the clerk and said, it was necessary to peel the trees to a height of two meters, well, the boys took the gasoline seals and peeled, left such beautiful clean pni two meters in height, the clerk when he saw the oral pleased, "you're going to cheat the pydoras tomorrow the branches back you'll be knocking".)))))

[ + 48 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №14587
 18.02.2009
From the forum.kaspersky.com

SvetlanaSemenenko
28 July 2005 08:20
Dear Defenders of Viruses.
I have a problem with viruses. My computer is starting to behave inappropriately. As long as I did not insist on it (on myself), it started to turn off in the middle of the day. Sometimes it turns off, sometimes not.
Our computer engineers said that this malicious virus has stolen into my folders and could destroy everything there. It was recommended to ask for help here, from leading virus engineers.
And another problem. A neighbor’s computer has a Kaspersky program installed, which shows us a umbrella every morning. There was no rain and there was no rain. Computer scientists say this program is just catching viruses at this point, and we think it’s lying about the weather. Who of us is right?
Thanks in advance. and Svetlana.

Tristram
28 July 2005 09:53
5 Points

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №14586
 18.02.2009
What is the name of the new GTA? Who knows?
Tagged: gta4
zzz: Captain Evidence is back with us.

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