bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №141403
 17.05.2017
to this:
May God let these people, who are outraged by child cowards, never fail to pass the laws.

And the Millions?? to

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №141402
 17.05.2017
Who is? Who is? WHAT are these four hundred people with a tail, who licked another sad discharge of a pedophile friend? And they still walk among us and pretend to be normal people.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №141401
 17.05.2017
In the eighth grade bought a book - "training a skiing athlete", three times a week after lessons ran on the ski track, mastering different techniques of running. And here, finally, comes the day of my triumph - the count on physical education (skiing).



I start, I work clearly with my sticks, I keep the pace. In a few minutes I’ll hear – skiing! Healthy as a salmon twin from our class, holding both sticks under the mouse and smoking a cigarette (! It moves around me and moves forward.



After this episode, the skies went to the balcony, and the book - to the maculature.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №141400
 17.05.2017
About the fashion virus Wanna Cry, from some news site:
The authors approached the writing of the virus non-trivially. This is the first time a virus spreads on its own. This means that it was clearly not written by students", says the information security specialist."
Does the phrase seem strange to me?? to

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №141399
 17.05.2017
From the factory, both socks in a pair come absolutely the same, but when you stretch one socks on your left leg, the other automatically becomes right) And instantly, regardless of the distance between your legs

This is genius, genius :)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №141398
 17.05.2017
XXX: It seems that the three laws of officials are:
XXX The First Law. An official cannot by his actions benefit the people or by his inaction allow the people to benefit.
XXX: The Second Law. The official shall obey the instructions of the chief, unless this is contrary to the First Law.
XXX: The Third Law An official shall take care of his own safety unless this is contrary to the First and Second Laws.
YYY: The first and second places need to be changed, right?
XXX: I do not have to. If the boss went crazy and came up with something useful, it is not a reason to execute his orders.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №141397
 17.05.2017
He decided to re-read the Constitution, but on the first pages realized that he had already grown out of fairy tales.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №141396
 17.05.2017
It was in the 70s. We arrived at the headquarters check. The construction inspection. There is an inspector, a colonel. He approaches one of our officers and asks, "Well, captain, because the mouth is so red, you probably drink without drying? (and the captain had to resign from the armed forces after a month of service, and his face in life was always red, like a tomato). To this ham question the cap replies: No, Comrade Colonel, I just want to fuck, I wait for you to let go, I tolerate. The colonel jumped away from him as if he had been squeezed. This look is over. The commander of our cap of course then tried to "strike". But Tom was already like Dembele.

[ + 31 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №141395
 17.05.2017
I am afraid that we are going to the point that in the end believers will insult the existence of atheists and we will all be transplanted.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №141394
 17.05.2017
Today as an argument on the internet heard, genius! On the accusations of the opponent on what to say visavi, minor and school. Chel replied that he was a reserve student for a long time,

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №141393
 17.05.2017
Yesterday on the street (in the school area!) During the school class, a woman came with a large dog. On my comment to take her on the lead, I noticed: "she is good". A minute later, something else followed. Maybe she is good. But the housewife is no longer there, because the fact that the housewife was broken.
As a result, she remained on the school territory with a dog without a mummy, who was good at crawling and writing there.

[ + 32 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №141392
 17.05.2017
Stay away from vegans and the like. Let them eat what they want, so they will die out faster. Long live natural selection! We’ll get more meat.

[ + 13 - ] Comment quote №141391
 17.05.2017
Recently in the general local intrus chat someone hard, but in a good joke that the Russian state took everything, even the eyes from the smiley.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №141390
 17.05.2017
XXX: Looking back at WALL-E, I realized something.
xxx: All the problems from the fact that the captain forgot to give an admin from the steering wheel

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №141389
 17.05.2017
12:25 _IOJIbKA_ » Ovcepes: Are you from Omsk?
12:25 OVCEPEO » _IOJIbKA_: God has mercy.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №141388
 17.05.2017
XXX: I wait for a taxi, knocking out on the street near the parking lot. The guard suits. He says: I need your advice, you are working in Tanks. I say OK. He carries the head of a wool with horns (real horns) cut out of a tree and asks if another layer of lacquer should cover the tree.
xxx: I am a respected person)))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №141387
 17.05.2017
Yesterday watched a picture of a young girl (23-25 years old) leading the hand of a six-year-old girl, who is crying very loudly, the girl on a T-shirt adopted "enjoy the silence"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №141386
 17.05.2017
A 9,000-year-old artifact was found in Israel.

It was a 9,000-year-old local resident Solomon Markovich Zilberstein. "Do not wait" and c)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №141385
 17.05.2017
HH: How is it?
Two tickets left, and that’s all.
HHH: And then what?
And then I go to sleep.
HH: And then what?
WOW: And then I will sleep.
HH: And then what?
Then I wake up. To tell further?
HH: Probably not. Interesting, you have a life.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №141384
 17.05.2017
by Luckystar
When I eat a crochet with cream popularly, I begin to bite it off from the wide side. But when alone with you, then you can allow yourself to eat it, as if exhausting, and, almost exhausted, finally taste the whole cream at once. You can also scratch the cream with a spoonful, you can try to dry it... you can bite it in the middle, you can cut it in half... Darrell in one book had a story about the scratch, each of which ate a banana in its own way. One threw a peel and ate a banana, a third ate a banana with a peel... the question of the scalp is not so simple. It needs discussion.

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