bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138743
 13.02.2017
In Saratov find out why Katfalk came to the retiree before the ambulance

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №138742
 13.02.2017
I am a teacher of robotics. I had a conversation with one of the students. I wonder what is the difference between speed and power. The speed is faster, and the power is more powerful.
Artem 9 years

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №138741
 13.02.2017
My mother’s hair was beautiful, her hair was on her hand. But my mom chose one who has thicker hair on the back than on the head.
now elegant hair I can boast only in places not intended for them in girls))) the question: mom, what x?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №138740
 13.02.2017
Politician promises are like tea in a thermos: the closer the bottom, the sweeter :)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138739
 13.02.2017
Tagged #marker_huyarker

>> clichés about the "comfort zone" - this is, sorry, marker, <<

About the “comfort zone” now only the full down doesn’t know, and only the stubborn “personal growth” seriously use this evil combination. Others are choking.
A marker is, sorry, the person who counts the points on the billiard.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138738
 13.02.2017
What about the zombie apocalypse?
BBB: Guy, I have been striking Pionierskiy every morning at the peak hour for three years! This is where the zombie apocalypse was!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №138737
 13.02.2017
A few weeks as I work in a new place. I look around, learn to understand what my colleagues are representing - I look for everyone on social networks.

One is quite active on his page, writes a lot of posts about girls and, in particular, about what they are all the same and not individual at all, get stuck for nothing. He even writes in principle not bad - literally and complexly. But in reality, I have a problem with him – all the time I’m afraid to confuse with someone of the very same bearded tattooed young people in glasses and with waves.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138736
 13.02.2017
...
If you let a person go, do not control him in any way, he will immediately slide into a hole, that is, turn into an ordinary, insecure animal. In order for him to go to the mountain, he needs to be pushed there, and it is best to drive him with his pencil. In order not to get an extra penalty, he will start to optimize the climb, invent any useful on the way up, improve the climb, and still get to the top.

This is the sad donation. The whole, his mother, world and historical experience, which literally cries out that a person should be free, motivated, educated and have a sense of self-worth. But not. We have little of the Soviet pushers, little of the European dark ages, little of the two-thousand-year-old concept of original sin and man as dirt under our feet, little. The next "for the skin and into the paradise" came out. After that, we have what we have. by Tifou.

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138735
 13.02.2017
Oh you suicides! And you can’t do the society a favor...to silence any corrupt before you give up???! to

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №138734
 12.02.2017
Causal and consequential isolation

I have such in my wife.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №138733
 12.02.2017
(On the bootstap 4)
xxx is. He just came out, right?
YYY: This is the web. You have to study it before it becomes obsolete.
xxx: yyy, if I have time to learn it before midnight, what is the probability that it will not get obsolete afterwards?
XXX is no chance.
zzz: Cinderella, remember - exactly at midnight the car will turn into a pumpkin, and the framework will be updated without reverse compatibility!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №138732
 12.02.2017
No, not a legal one.

.............
The Legal Case

= "Negers are raping a dead donkey"

And why "violate", but the animal did not resist? = is

On the other hand, to say that by consent, also can not. A dead animal cannot be persuaded.
.............

It just meant a completely different verb. But the writer is too well educated to say "ebut". Not that I myself was very uneducated; but I remember one of my first lectures on linguistics in the Volgograd ped. by Зав. and cafe. Prof. Shakhovsky then spoke to the whole stream of pioneers: "The true linguist pronounces the word 'n' not red."

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138731
 12.02.2017
xxx: But, by the way, it was wildly funny when some guy said to me "Oh, right she is rushing here, equality wants, go to the factory to work! ", and I am like "I am working at the factory, BULVAN! And I do a lot of hard work, like the hundreds of women I see there every day, who take 12 hours in day and night shifts to pull concrete with their blades, repair huge machines, put jewelry with many tons of items, sit on the crane, work on a break-up, break off products from the pads, climb into the oven, within which 60 degrees to push the stuck pad, work with chemicals from which the skin runs.

This silence responds to you. A striking detachment from reality in people))

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138730
 12.02.2017
XXX: Imagine the pushes were on the street before. In the frost! Before it, you still have to go through the N number of steps, and then sit in the unheated cabin!
YYY: Therefore, before, they fought quickly...
XXX and rarely.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138729
 12.02.2017
In manic states, people begin to commit reckless acts, make unreasonable financial expenses, build unrealistic projects, become euphoric, joyful, careless, discouraged in the sphere of inclinations, create conflict situations.
Fuck, we have half a country like that.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138728
 12.02.2017
And tell us what you need to do to survive in the falling elevator cabin. I, as an electromechanic on the maintenance of elevators, really interested) Until they found out that you can do nothing, lie down, sit down, pray to any of the gods - the result is roughly the same. What else?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №138727
 12.02.2017
Have you been to the funeral?
and yes.
And how did it all go?
- What do you expect to hear that all those present have overrun, or that the dead man has stood up and gone?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138726
 12.02.2017
New Opportunities

The surgeons replaced the penis with a surrogate, made precisely from the least needed FINGER of the victim. > and >

Beautiful - you drop the stickers and characteristic movement: "Go here"...
Or, as in that children’s movie: "The Debt!".

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138725
 12.02.2017
Retirement is an assault on the government.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №138724
 12.02.2017
During our trip to Elbrus, when we were already in the mountains, the tour guide told us about the following local legend:
“You see that rock? It is said that a long time ago in the neighboring halls lived a wonderful young man and a beautiful girl. The first time they saw each other, they decided not to get married, so strong was their love. But their parents were categorically against their marriage, because the bride's father was rich, had a large house and many lambs, and the young man's parents were poor and barely brought ends with ends. But the young man's parents came from an impoverished, but ancient and noble family, and the parents of the bride could not boast of a noble origin.
And here, completely desperate to get married, the young man and the girl decided to reduce the accounts with life. Together, they climbed up the mountain, found a steep cliff, took their hands and, running away, planned to jump. The young man jumped, and the girl, scared of death, in the last second dropped his hand and stopped at the very edge.
The young man fell to the bottom of a deep pit and crashed, and in the place where he fell, a plant grew. What do you think it was called?”
The wild rose! and Lily! The Mac! “Barbary!” I heard the passengers of the bus.
"Lop" - a loud bass authority said the driver

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna