bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №138643
 10.02.2017
The boredom has attacked. The grief is green.
Do the bonding. It takes time, hands and brains. It distracts from everything. One of my classmates saved 50 times.
From boredom or from grief?
From a broken nose. I had the habit of hanging in the breaks. She had the habit of showing me up. But when she had to break into the shrub, my hands and brains were busy counting the cock.
WOW: Definitely not boring.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138642
 10.02.2017
The trousers are turning...

This is when a man is a fool, but at the same time is silent - everyone around is well, and he is not bad too.
When a girl tries to be smart

Classically, when discussing stupidity, a man suddenly turned into a girl by a smooth movement of his hand.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №138641
 10.02.2017
In China, a factory producing batteries for Samsung smartphones burned

The timers on the finished batteries were misplaced, they should have worked in a couple of months.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138640
 09.02.2017
TV shows dancing with the stars, stars on the ice, now like stars with dolphins.
And I dreamed of a great idea: and today by the sound of the merging water the stars will determine and eliminate the breakdown in the toilet. The Sanitary Show!
In the dream, the idea was a fierce success.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №138639
 09.02.2017
News headlines on Yandex
Arguments and facts: Boeing interrupted the take-off at Norilsk airport due to the signal of opening the door
Russian News Service: The door of the Boeing during the take-off in Norilsk opened
Echo of St. Petersburg: the S7 aircraft could not depart from Norilsk because of the opened door
In Norilsk, the aircraft with 666 kg of cargo at take-off opened the door

To the last, it is asked to clarify that the door to hell has opened.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №138638
 09.02.2017
# throwing
Here is, seemingly, a simple question: Why do many people want to chew them when they see animals?
Why do many animals like it?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №138637
 09.02.2017
xxx> No money
yyy> More specifically
xxx> what is it?
yyy> 5000p before receipt? A thousand rpm?
xxx> "Take the points from the card, please."

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №138636
 09.02.2017
AAA: What is the movie about?
BBB: Aaa, a bunch of babs are shaking at Colin Farrell.
ccc: bbb, documentary, what is it? :D
ddd: bbb, just like about our forum :lol:

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №138635
 09.02.2017
Moscow police officer refused bribes in 65 thousand. by Ruth"

Such a miser as a plum in the soul.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138634
 09.02.2017
I broke up (confirmed bankruptcy) insurance, where I did CASCO on the car. I have a new policy today. I found out that the insurance incident is not a nuclear explosion. It is offensive.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138633
 09.02.2017
Q: Do you need to wake up?
YYY: I am working. and then

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №138632
 09.02.2017
With Geektimes.

Everyone can have their weaknesses. For example, Zuckerberg is clearly not a messenger, but his nearby neighbors are clearly stressing him. Someone, on the contrary, has a house of 100 square meters on 4 cents of land (how many acres?), and squares 20 in the house occupies the wardrobe, filled with an inexpensive cloth.
Someone is buying crazy cars. Someone is spending money on yachts. Someone likes to have their own fleet (helicopters, planes, maybe even a personal airfield).
I don’t turn off the water when I brush my teeth.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №138631
 09.02.2017
Disqualification of Olympic champion from the United States.

In Norway, asthmatics set records, in America - hypertensive. The whole sport is on sick heroes :)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №138630
 09.02.2017
Psychosynthesis: <...> Some strange scientists have gone now.
100% of rape victims ate cucumbers. and c)
Shchepin: I also eat cucumbers.
Psychosynthesis: Well, it’s a matter of time...
sleeply4cat: And I’m made up of 85% cucumbers.
WildHorn: Sooner or later you will be eaten. by 85 percent.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №138629
 09.02.2017
Pregnant wife (J) observes how a tired husband (M) carries furniture for the tenth time to the elevator/out of the elevator, etc.
It’s good to be a girl!)
M: You will soon change your mind.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №138628
 09.02.2017
A woman tells a story:
We are all in a chat: three married, three unmarried and I...

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №138627
 09.02.2017
xxx: I remembered something... One group of people from the community brought a laptop for couples, and right in the middle of the presentation a cockroach came out of it.
xxx: Half of the group, a crazed choir: "fuow, cockroach!!!". The second half, joyfully: "o, the cockroach!".
XXX: Express test on the communal, fucking :)

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №138626
 09.02.2017
A French detective from the 1970s. Hey, these wild French served meat not red, but white wine, the bagel was cut, and not broken with their hands... our snobs are better not to watch such a nightmare, so that in terrible seizures to die.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №138625
 09.02.2017
Tagged with: Spectacle
<<In the work, part of the collective former military. Here is the eyewitness of the next.The old man is studying the young man.
<...>
He closes and can’t answer anything. The old men began to study it.... >>
.............
Wikipedia: "Study" - study carefully. What do old people do with young people? Where are you working? But all, I see it. You are working "for work".

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №138624
 09.02.2017
xxx> a colleague calls, says, comrades alone do not pay and do not answer the phone. You can "how in movies" by mobile phone number to determine where a person is now?"
yyy> Oh, I was asked the same!
xxx> well, of course, because "eyehacker"
zzz> Well what are you cuddling, just "look at the computer"
zzz> it is easy
xxx> a, right now
xxx> I have forgotten, I have to look at the computer.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna