The story of yesterday’s car racing. On the contrary, I have a funny story.
90 year old. End of April. The first time I was going to take a five-year-old daughter to the sea to Turkey (warm up after the winter cold). Arrived at the “River Station”, well, further standard, the bus trip to “Sharika”. Sit down and go. Only the bus moves more and more slowly, and at the end stops at all - Leningradka. Before the reconstruction. and all. The trunk does not want to move completely. In 5 minutes, the entire bus "catches" in which buttock muscle we hit. Screams like: “Our flight registration is on!” (and then it was 2 hours before departure) and “I’m already late!” collide in the air. The whole thing is that there is only one tiny possibility left - the right row, but a very narrow "foot", there barely slip through the lighthouses. People begin to leave the bus. Everyone is crowded on the side, trying to stop at least something. We go out, my daughter and I, and we understand – it’s a matter of seams. The child promised. For the first time in life – a foreign country, the sea, the sun and so on. My daughter is almost crying. In case we passed 25 meters ahead and we also try to swallow with pins, say, save, bring.
and here! A collector’s machine brakes around us, a guard in uniform rises out of it and asks, “To the airport?” “Come down, we go there!” by a bird, a whale, a fly (or who else is shusty there?) put into the car. We go without believing in our happiness. The child called the camouflaged guards “super ninja turtles” and asked to touch the machine (or what they had there). The most sociable asks, “What time is the flight?” At five o’clock, the registration begins. He says to the driver, “Dima, let’s!” Included a syrene, a flashlight and “toxic”. of your division. For the first (and probably the last) time in my life, I was moving in a collector’s car with all the pribadabases, and a few cars (most of them left behind, in traffic jams) left behind the road. We had time and passed all the controls quite calmly.
Thank you guys. There are no real men in Russia.

Twitter taught me how to express my thoughts in 140 characters.
This is good, but you could write a little more here. Diploma anyway.

Don’t think about eating a delayed baby breakfast “Alphabet” (all in the form of letters).

There is a verbal diarrhea.

Common-minded people need prushes, otherwise the presumption of hypocrisy comes into effect.

As a child, I think all mommy strictly punished strangers not to open the door. I am 7 years old, alone at home. When I knock on the door, I run to look in the eye and see an unknown uncle. The bearded uncle with a drunk voice demanded to open the door to him, saying, “That’s me, Tanjuha! “” Yes, my name is Tanya, but I didn’t open the door. A drunk uncle was sitting under the door until evening until his mother came back from work.

It turned out that it was my brother who returned from the army, and we have 13 years difference with him. He still reminds me of it, and my mother said I did the right thing.

Players in Conan Exiles were allowed to choose the size of the genitals, and the creators of Final Fantasy released a festive set for the anniversary of the series.

Developers often allow players to customize the appearance of game characters. But no one seems to have gone so far as the authors of Conan Exiles. The first users of the game discovered that, among other things, in the game you can choose the size of the sexual organ of the male characters. The developers were not even lazy to realize the physics of the male genitals.

And yet...

Talk to my wife before bed:
Let’s play the telepaths.
to go.
Read my thoughts!
-...Kolbaaska... Rhyubby... Fuck, our cat is burning up again!

AlCat: We have a cat from the morning playing, running, throwing on everyone. Father Shats came from the store, took off the coff, threw on the couch. The cat lay down on her with such a look as if she had caught and eaten the bat, and now lies on the skin of the defeated enemy.

Discussions in the Hague
SADKO>... if modern monks were to be forced to write the Orthodox code in the great Russian language, it would be benevolent and useful to the power!
Alexeyco> We’ve talked about this before. Daemon ==> ladies and gentlemen. root ==> Swarog (it would be more reasonable to use Makosh, but I fear it will cause confusion with Makosh).
Let’s say nginx ==> a strawberry.
God’s name, God’s name, turn back
Then, for example, to Cyrillize the FS...
$ name /etc/first.k/archive work
I forgot, here’s another option.
$ where
$ who
God what is happening.

(Image: a couple is sitting in a room, a third is watching them behind the window. She is "Don’t be afraid, it’s a marketer who collects our personal data to show you relevant advertising")
xxxx> and
I think, in the eyes of marketers, I am myself a seven punk of eight people.
yyyy> yyyy
yyyy> one of whom is an amateur gay porn?
xxxx> yes, by itself

Career self-driving... It sounds like an office slang. And let’s call the Downshippers, like in Russian?

Freo: In general, it is very easy to make a useful and even motivating video from porn. It is enough at the end of each film to insert participants coming out with happy persons from the nursery with a baby in their arms.
The whole film, two dozen blacks rape an unfortunate girl on the underground parking lot, and in the end, the whole crowd happily masks the camera in the nursery! and :)

Did you say you look like Kirkorov?
YYY: It’s still normal...I’ve been a bit like a beer before. And as soon as I changed my hair, he made me look like a cattle.

The guard from the entrance gave a disc. I turned on, and there are 3 gigs of records from the camera of the elevator, where I dance while I go. Leaving home is uncomfortable.

XXX: What happened today. Early in the morning, in the frost, one aunt brought two children with births in blood to us to the hospital. As it turned out, these two, brother and sister (boyfriend in the third, and girl in the second class), decided to try the language nearest pillar, will he stick or not)))) the first girl clinged, speak the eagle as cut, the tongue then from the pillar does not go away.... the boy (like the older brother) decided to help and began to show how to correctly tear off the tongue from the pillar)))) showed (it is necessary to first stick with the tongue, and then to tear it off), but calculated and the example itself)))) alcohol they pulled away, brought to the hospital))) mouths in blood, tongues swollen, the girl cries, the puppy in shock))))

I met a superman today.
In the sense?
- You know, I walk on the street, I approach the corner of the house, and there is ice under my feet, well, the man on it climbs and falls, facing to the ground, but in the same second he sneezes sharply and his head balances the body, but it seems he did not calculate the strength of the cheek and still fell, but already on the ass. It all happened in a moment... but how could it happen!? to
He has a good self-preservation instinct.
- I sneeze at the moment when I fall my face forward and sneeze to balance myself... still in shock xD

British produced minute cartoons based on Russian classics

“Crime and Punishment”, “Master and Margarita”, “Life and Destiny” – all plots fit into 40-second videos. The first place was taken by the cartoon based on “Doctor Zhivago” by Boris Pasternak. The winners received £1,000.

What about ' War and Peace?

Dominic Monaghan, who played the hobbit Merry, posted a photo on his Instagram, in which the actor's staff "Lord of the Rings" rests in one of the bars.

Monaghan's company was made up of two more hobbies: Elijah Wood and Billy Boyd, Viggo Mortensen and Orlando Bloom.

Fans of the fantastic trilogy noted how their favorite actors have aged. The gray in the hair appeared in everyone except Elijah Wood, and this leads to the thought that the Ring of Almighty has not been destroyed and is still stored in the pocket of the astute hobbit.

I transferred the system to my younger sister (20 years old).

Sister: And this file will not be deleted, right? The Truth? It is my whole life, my whole life!! to

The folder was called “FIGNIA,” and that’s all you need to know about my sister’s life.

A Russian teacher told me how he laughed when he found a button in the store. Wiping tears, he asked to call the administrator, asked if she knew who the goldmer was, and advised not to order this product anymore, because the sewage bread is not too appetizing.